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Who takes the lead?

  • Me!

    Votes: 7 25.9%

  • The provider

    Votes: 10 37.0%

  • It depends

    Votes: 10 37.0%
  • Total voters
    27
Depends on who it is........first time meeting? A regular? What they look like? A lot has be thought about when it comes to this question.......
 
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If the 1st meeting is with someone like you......maybe right at the door.......if it's with someone I've never talked with before then probably a few minutes of eyeball2eyeball to see where there at.
 
Hmm so I have had a couple times with very westernized Japanese girls were we chatted too long and got a serious friend vibe going. (still haven't popped my western girl p4p cherry)

It made the physical stuff more awkward. After the second time this happened, I have specifically not lingered on the initial chatting and kept things moving.

Also, I LOVE it when girls take the lead or at least communicate what they like. I am the lead 90% of the time but the girls who are more aggressive/direct are my absolute favorites.
 
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Usually after sorting business I'll make a little small talk for 10 minutes I find it's better to at least break the ice with a new person and get comfortable with them we will be getting intimate soon so it's nice to connect with them at least a little even if it's just talking about my day so far and sharing a joke to relax the mood. Of course it's different when language barriers are an issue there is not much conversation to be had so starting with some cuddling and petting isn't a bad idea just as long as we connect somehow before getting more intimate. Talking is also a chance to find out things they enjoy in bed.

I prefer to take the lead with women I prefer generally more submissive ones not that I want them to go dead fish on me but I like things a certain way and it's hard for me to get myself in the mood if they have their own routine and are pushy about keeping everyone they see in that same routine. I like to start with doing stuff to them first because if I can get a good response from them I find that a turn on and then I can tell them what I want them to do to me once I'm more in the mood. I'm just more of a giver than a taker in bed if I'm laying there having them do stuff to me for too long I just get bored lol. Just prefer to take things slow and build up to the sex and not have them go right into a BJ and FS. It's like some providers just want to rush and get it over with.
 
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Not really fair for me to comment on this, but I'd probably want some direction from whomever I was meeting. I have next to zero experience, so I'd be a total noob....

In my 'regular' relationships, if you want to call it that, it's been a 50/50 situation.
 
The most experienced escort I've ever known really well told me that it is possible to learn to read a customer's body language really fast when you lay eyes on him to find out if he will be comfortable with getting physical immediately or needs a warm up conversation first. She said it is not very different from reading whether or not a guy is about to "make a move" or is contemplating doing so on a conventional date.

-Ww
 
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I think I like to chat first. Also, yup, prefer the girl to take the lead. Each one seems to have different rules and I so don't wanna cause problems breaking them.
 
My answer to the survey was "It depends". It depends partly on my mood of the moment, but mostly it depends on how I read the SW in question. If I get the impression that she has a "game plan" or script she wants to follow, I normally let her run with it to see where it takes us. I figure this is more likely to get her best efforts than if I throw her off track and enforce my own ideas on the encounter. However, if she seems to be looking to me to see what I want (which is a good sign, of course), then I am happy to take the lead. All this assumes that it is a first date/encounter and that my own mood isn't unusually passive or active at the time.

-Ww
 
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I don't pay the girls to have a lengthy chat, if I wanted that I would go to a girls bar or similar place. That being said there is usually quite some opportunity to chat while fondling /kissing /undressing etc.
I prefer the girl taking the lead mainly because for some reason in my relationships I often end up being the one who takes the lead. It's also a bit the notion of "I want it too" instead of "I let you proceed ".
Her leading of course doesn't mean that I'm passive all the time

This jumping me right after the doorsteps would be a pretty attractive scenario for a second date

Sometimes in the mood too for taking the lead, so I voted it depends. For further dates once you learned a bit more what she likes that also has its own appeal
 
i would like a provider to act as if she can't wait to get my clothes off.. so yes her take the lead.. maybe that's just me!
 
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i guess if they were acting like that then i would reciprocate.. then no one is taking the lead.. a power struggle!
 
That's a good question ! I've tried two escort Kaori from AM and Saaya from JK, and my experience is that by speaking a lot with Kaori I felt more "unique", I like to speak on interesting subject, I may even forget sex if you push too far.
But at the same time I remember getting slightly annoyed when she spoke a bit too long...

Saaya was all sex, no speaking. Wonderful body, wonderful experience, but I did not felt the need to see her again as I did with Kaori, and the lack of chat was the only reason I can see.

I prefer the provider to take the lead, but I often ask to take it for my "sexual education" which started not long time ago. :p
 
I always take the lead. This isn't a prom date so if I'm paying its about getting the pompom. I let them know I'm very interested with soft touching if they act shy but if they are down from the get go I'm caressing their buttocks. And if they have big tits I'm starting the conversation with that. Small talk is cool but I let them know I'm horny as hell but I've always made them comfortable but also made them feel like they are sexy to me. 9 times outta ten they are but its about bringing that erotic energy out of them.
 
I generally prefer some contact immediately, maybe a little making out. We can get to know each other a little in the shower or after the first round. If a girl isn't super-comfortable with that, I'm fine with sitting down for a few minutes and talking while escalating physical contact, though. That's pretty hot, too.
 
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Amusing...the poll is currently split perfectly (40%-40%-20%), so not even a statistical hint for the OP as to which is the best choice/tactic for her!

-Ww
 
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it seems very "un-gentlemanly" to me to just go in there and get very physical straight away (that is exactly what i want to do and what i pay for though). jb just go in hard .. and take it from there ;) my 2 cents
 
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On a first meeting, I generally let the provider take the lead, at least until her comfort zones are sort of established.

On subsequent visits, it varies depending on the vibe i have with the lady in question, whether they're more naturally inclined towards being submissive or dominant, and even on my own mood that day.
 
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User#16452 said:
Yes, not even a slight lead. Let's see if it's still the same in a week's time.

If anything though, perhaps we can learn from the poll that if a provider or gentleman seems passive or hesitant when you first meet, it isn't necessary that they doesn't like you but that they might just be waiting for you to take the lead.
Click to expand...
Yup, yup, yup!
 
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there is nothing hotter than sexual assertiveness.. no man in their right mind would not love being come on to by you jb! ;)
 
Hey guys ill be with my first ever escort ever on the 16th and i was reading this post and ive just a question on any tips to do with leading and easing up with the girl/ letting her ease up aswell. Im kinda a bit nervous but on the otherhand personality wise i always like meeting new people so i kinda feel like i should be alright.

I feel like i am also the youngest here in my twenties, but i could be mistaken, but then again its been fun lurking and hearing of all the stories of you veterans :D
 
Ajkula42 said:
Hey guys ill be with my first ever escort ever on the 16th and i was reading this post and ive just a question on any tips to do with leading and easing up with the girl/ letting her ease up aswell. Im kinda a bit nervous but on the otherhand personality wise i always like meeting new people so i kinda feel like i should be alright.

I feel like i am also the youngest here in my twenties, but i could be mistaken, but then again its been fun lurking and hearing of all the stories of you veterans :D
Click to expand...

here is a tip, i wouldnt give out your age here for self identification reasons :)
 
Unless it's a repeat meeting I think it's kind of sociopathic to just jump on someone with no preamble, unless of course you've both discussed that beforehand in email. Needless to say I'm a 'warm up with a glass of wine and inch ever closer' type. I like to treat it like a real date, but one where we both know the outcome.
 
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