Communication etiquette between SB/SD

[scorpioni6ths]

Just out of curiosity , how did she explain the 1 month wait? And did you not feel neglected , like, at all? (Come on, be honest )

she was out of the country .. but given her situation i think it's her way of saying i got a richer SD that can pay for my vacations ... it's something i can't do.

neglected not really ... but i've got my own limits ... and they surely don't really control how i should feel ... i passed the time doing other girls ;-)

 

[Frenchy]

she was out of the country .. but given her situation i think it's her way of saying i got a richer SD that can pay for my vacations ... it's something i can't do.

neglected not really ... but i've got my own limits ... and they surely don't really control how i should feel ... i passed the time doing other girls ;-)

Wise man!

 

[scorpioni6ths]

Wise man!

most of the stoopid though ;-)

 

[warubuta]

Frenchy, although you would like to pretend otherwise, SBs relate with you almost completely because of the money. So if you don’t like the ghosting, late responses etc. just change the terms and conditions of the contract. Write up a simple Statement of Work that specifies exactly how many hours they have to respond etc. Make them sign it and send them a copy. But you will not do this. This is because you have convinced yourself, that it is not just the money. You think that they relate to you ( and you are correct to some smaller extent than you think) maybe mostly because of the money, but also because you are a nice guy, maybe even funny, and not bad looking, with a good suit and tie etc. Because of this, you are doomed to live this bitter sweet existence of trying to buy what can’t be bought: Amore!

 

[Frenchy]

Frenchy, although you would like to pretend otherwise, SBs relate with you almost completely because of the money. So if you don’t like the ghosting, late responses etc. just change the terms and conditions of the contract. Write up a simple Statement of Work that specifies exactly how many hours they have to respond etc. Make them sign it and send them a copy. But you will not do this. This is because you have convinced yourself, that it is not just the money. You think that they relate to you ( and you are correct to some smaller extent than you think) maybe mostly because of the money, but also because you are a nice guy, maybe even funny, and not bad looking, with a good suit and tie etc. Because of this, you are doomed to live this bitter sweet existence of trying to buy what can’t be bought: Amore!

There’s a lot of truth in that. But I also think that amore is overstated and better not engaged in. So go figure. It’s less romantic and more selfish than that: I’m just a sucker for respect, attention and fairness.@scorpioni6ths has a healthier outlook : he would not become a cry baby like me, just see another girl. Which is ultimately what I do anyway, just need to get over the butt-hurt feelings asap and ideally not feel them anymore.

 

[Coda87]

It is especially rude if you are using an app where u can see when they were last active .. Shows that they are ignoring you . .Unless they have sooo many in the que ur not getting visibility ...I'm old school as well ...Reply when written to same day if possible otherwise no point in the reply at all .
One technique to try is ask the schedule for next free day and just wait. ..If they reply then take the same amount of time they did.. .I know a bit immature ..But it often helps for future communication .

Don't forget ..It's all about "me" or "them" when exchanging msgs . . So easy to get offended

Haha, I have done this before, delay replying when they do it to me. One time my SB gave delayed responses all week. Then as we got close to our usual weekend date, she asked when we were gonna meet next. Like Frenchy I usually reply quickly (its a reflex probably related to my business manners), but this time I didn't reply. Then she texted me again the next morning all anxious and apologetic, sensing that she pissed me off.

 

[Frenchy]

Haha, I have done this before, delay replying when they do it to me. One time my SB gave delayed responses all week. Then as we got close to our usual weekend date, she asked when we were gonna meet next. Like Frenchy I usually reply quickly (its a reflex probably related to my business manners), but this time I didn't reply. Then she texted me again the next morning all anxious and apologetic, sensing that she pissed me off.

Well, it worked then!
Just for the sake of clarity though I did not mean I expect fast (of even any) answer for ALL messages I send , nor do I answer all of theirs if it’s not something which requires an answer. But in a context where it’s obviously needed (like : “so when can we meet next week?”) I find it rude to wait for, well, the end of next week

 

[Frenchy]

Update: so this pot SB (rather non-pot-anymore tbh) texted me again after ... 9 days. Well I’ll do the same, we’ll see. Reminds me the good old days when we were communicating with letters and postcards handwritten , with ink. Sometimes answers came quicker though.

 

[BB0523]

Update: so this pot SB (rather non-pot-anymore tbh) texted me again after ... 9 days. Well I’ll do the same, we’ll see. Reminds me the good old days when we were communicating with letters and postcards handwritten , with ink. Sometimes answers came quicker though.

Hand write a note and take a photo..... then send that to her next time you get a response... in the meantime.... you have about 9 days to find 7 other SB... yes.... 2 days of rest

 

[Rusty Trombone]

Update: so this pot SB (rather non-pot-anymore tbh) texted me again after ... 9 days. Well I’ll do the same, we’ll see. Reminds me the good old days when we were communicating with letters and postcards handwritten , with ink. Sometimes answers came quicker though.

Why even play that game? It's not worth it.
If it bugs you then send her a text saying she is to slow to reply, and you're not gonna see her anymore.

Personally I try not to even worry about this sort of shit. If it's just random chit chat, then I don't care how long she takes to reply. If it's for setting a date and she doesn't get back to me within a decent time frame, then I consider the invitation revoked, and if she replies later, then I'll say "sorry but you are too slow to reply, I've made other plans".

I get more bugged by the ones that need constant texts.

 

[oLUXo]

Why even play that game? It's not worth it.
If it bugs you then send her a text saying she is to slow to reply, and you're not gonna see her anymore.

Personally I try not to even worry about this sort of shit. If it's just random chit chat, then I don't care how long she takes to reply. If it's for setting a date and she doesn't get back to me within a decent time frame, then I consider the invitation revoked, and if she replies later, then I'll say "sorry but you are too slow to reply, I've made other plans".

I get more bugged by the ones that need constant texts.

Same here. The constant texting bothers me. If you can constantly text me, then ask to meet in person. Maybe it's because I sit all day in front of a computer and fix other computers, but sometimes it feels good to get out and away from a screen.

 

[Frenchy]

Why even play that game? It's not worth it.
If it bugs you then send her a text saying she is to slow to reply, and you're not gonna see her anymore.

Personally I try not to even worry about this sort of shit. If it's just random chit chat, then I don't care how long she takes to reply. If it's for setting a date and she doesn't get back to me within a decent time frame, then I consider the invitation revoked, and if she replies later, then I'll say "sorry but you are too slow to reply, I've made other plans".

I get more bugged by the ones that need constant texts.

You’re wiser than me!
And yes I don’t like too much texting either. As usual it’s all about balance and context.