Guest viewing is limited

Dating Apps I Recommend (2014-2015)

Randy Jinx said:
I've met up with well over a hundred women from various dating sites over the years here in Japan and have only ever been stood up once. I've been postponed a few times as well but the reasons seemed legit and we did meet up soon after. Heck, I even met up eventually with the one who stood me up but she was a complete nut case!

Long story short, if you have good approach online and get a reply, you can most certainly turn that into meet-ups.

I paraphrase Yoda now: "meet-ups lead to dates, dates lead to beds, beds lead to sex, sex leads to pleasure"

YMMV
Click to expand...
You should teach your 99% effective online hook-up to date methods. Why do you believe that you are so much more successful? Here is the place to explain.
 
Vulkan said:
My past experiences with tinder and okcupid more recently are that i usually get no reply after a match. It's like women there are playing a video game where the target is to accumulate matches.(n)
Click to expand...
I get hit with a certain percentage of this silliness myself. Tinder, OkCupid, and POF... My best guess is attention whoring type women, childish pranksters, or the website gaming and playing guys to update their account. Fake and bullshit profiles to keep guys interested, so they don't cancel. However, seems dumb, as it appears to anger many guys.
 
Last edited:
Solong said:
You should teach your 99% effective online hook-up to date methods. Why do you believe that you are so much more successful? Here is the place to explain.
Click to expand...

no massive secret to it. When sending a message, make sure you actually read their profile. Comment and ask questions about stuff they mention in the profile. If they reply, be funny and be the man. After a little back and forth, ask them out directly, no wishy-washy shit like, 'hey why don't we meet up sometime?'. Have a plan, some good date ideas to propose right from the start, something like 'I;m planning on doing blah blah on Saturday, night. Why don't you join?'. If she says yes, get off that site as quickly as possible and use Line or direct texting (it's been mentioned in other posts above). Set a firm time and place and the rest should be easy unless you have the social skills of a 47-year old Pokemon collector.
But each case is different. The real commonality amongst most of my successes was being funny, being fun, being the lead.
 
Randy Jinx said:
no massive secret to it. When sending a message, make sure you actually read their profile. Comment and ask questions about stuff they mention in the profile. If they reply, be funny and be the man. After a little back and forth, ask them out directly, no wishy-washy shit like, 'hey why don't we meet up sometime?'. Have a plan, some good date ideas to propose right from the start, something like 'I;m planning on doing blah blah on Saturday, night. Why don't you join?'. If she says yes, get off that site as quickly as possible and use Line or direct texting (it's been mentioned in other posts above). Set a firm time and place and the rest should be easy unless you have the social skills of a 47-year old Pokemon collector.
But each case is different. The real commonality amongst most of my successes was being funny, being fun, being the lead.
Click to expand...

I do pretty much that, but not getting such a high 99% online reply to meeting up for the date rate. Maybe also, we are using different dating websites.

Still getting some flakes, prankish types, or last minute or that day cancels. About 1 out of every 10. 90% is good, but that 10% seems to lock on to the worse time possible or be quote annoying. That's why I double stack or plan B, especially on the weekends, where I will have 2 dates, or 1 online date in reserve, on the same day.

The double stacking counters the flakes. If the online date pulls a no show or last second cancel, it doesn't matter to me.

And I pull the women off the site before asking for dates. Which I find interesting about your style. Seems you are playing with them and asking for the date on the website. I don't use that style, because many websites have fake chat profiles or attention whore females that loving playing on the websites.

When I do that style, ask for dates on the website, I still get a certain percentage of women that won't exchange contacts. That's another point.

So for me, the litmus test is to see if she will exchange contacts or not. If not, then will cut her off right there. Then from LINE or e-mail, will ask for a date. If no or some odd time beyond 2 weeks, might also drop her contact then too.
 
just in case my previous postings were a bit muddled (thanks vodka!) I feel I should be a bit more clear on my 'success' rate.

re: 'likes', I never use them as a communication method. I used sending them as a way of keeping another list of potentially interesting people. 'Likes' I received at best may have indicated someone who didn't show up in my usual search pattern.

I read a lot of profiles and sent a lot of messages. I did not get a 99% reply rate. I'd estimate 20-25%. If the reply message inspired me, we'd chat. Of those 20-25%, I'd probably ask 80% or so out. Of those 80% I'd guess that over 50% said yes and we'd set it up. Of those 50+%, I actually did meet all of them. Women that I made a date plan with, I met.

My maths are pretty shite but someone could do the calculation to see what the real ratio of messages to meet is. As I've said, I've met over a hundred women using PoF, OKC, Tagged and JapanCupid (I don't date anymore, married with a kid on the way. Tinder was before my time). If you wanna take it a step further, my game isn't the best so of the 100 or so I met, I only slept with about a dozen.

And whatever that ratio turns out to be, I don't feel bad (or good, really) about it at all. Even the shitty dates will give you a chance to practice your skillz and learn yourself something. My ratio and your ratios will be what they will be. It's what you make of it moving forward that matters.

My whole point originally was that I believe my messaging and personality led the women to feeling comfortable meeting up. If you want to get to the actual date, don't dick it up by being impatient, needy, weird, over-aggressive, in your messaging. Use your upper brain not the lower one. And once you meet, you're on your own. Use what some of the other boys here talk about to make better connections.

And keep it Randy!
 
  • Like
Reactions: Solong
A question about Japancupid.com. For US citizens/residents, there is IMBRA ( international marriage broker requirements act) requirements to disclose information to a foreign person before initiating any communication. Does anyone have details? Even if one does not want to marry or bring anyone into the US, i.e. just for friendship, there does not seem to be anyway out. The act was designed to prevent immigrant abuse but does not make sense for just friendship. Any US folks have used Japancupid? Provided needed information?
 
JapanCupid is still pretty good. I met 8 women this year. I think I met more than 50 women from JC in about 4 years. But the women are mostly 'mature' of 35 to 50 years. Which is great if you like that age group.
 
  • Like
Reactions: owlet and cabbie
rednose72 said:
JapanCupid is still pretty good. I met 8 women this year. I think I met more than 50 women from JC in about 4 years. But the women are mostly 'mature' of 35 to 50 years. Which is great if you like that age group.
Click to expand...
i only got messaged by unfuckable older ladies on JC lol
 
What's the best "free" site in your opinions?
 
just4fun said:
What's the best "free" site in your opinions?
Click to expand...

You know what... from what I'm hearing now, Tinder is the best 'free' option as long as you don't pay for the service.

Tinder also updated their Gender profiles: http://blog.gotinder.com/genders/
So, you can weed out the people that you probably woudn't want to meet anyway. (or at least, help)
 
  • Like
Reactions: just4fun
Tinder is for phones only it seems. Thanks for the update though TM
 
dmzone said:
A question about Japancupid.com. For US citizens/residents, there is IMBRA ( international marriage broker requirements act) requirements to disclose information to a foreign person before initiating any communication. Does anyone have details? Even if one does not want to marry or bring anyone into the US, i.e. just for friendship, there does not seem to be anyway out. The act was designed to prevent immigrant abuse but does not make sense for just friendship. Any US folks have used Japancupid? Provided needed information?
Click to expand...

I got married through Japancupid several years ago and the reason I'm here now. still married to her and never heard of this law but was never married before meeting her. US is so arrogant thinking that everyone wants to immigrate there. my wife doesn't want to live there. even the consulates have that brochure that says with a us passport "the world is yours" of which they are oblivious how offensive that comes off to foreigners.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: cabbie, AliceInWonderland and just4fun
split said:
US is so arrogant thinking that everyone wants to immigrate there. my wife doesn't want to live there. even the consulates have that brochure that says with a us passport "the world is yours" of which they are oblivious how offensive that comes off to foreigners.
Click to expand...
I regularly see an advert on Facebook about how I can make my dream of becoming a US citizen come true. Every time I'm like "how about... no."
 
  • Like
Reactions: AliceInWonderland and MikeH
Gunmachan said:
I regularly see an advert on Facebook about how I can make my dream of becoming a US citizen come true. Every time I'm like "how about... no."
Click to expand...
Hah! Especially with their current president i would pass for the honor!
 
owlet said:
i only got messaged by unfuckable older ladies on JC lol
Click to expand...

Met lots of girls on JC, the four I ended up having sex with were average or even not so good-looking girls in their mid to late twenties who had just arrived in Tokyo from remote parts of Japan and who were desperate to lose their virginity, for some reason with a foreigner. There was a fifth one but she happened to be asexual so somehow she only wanted someone to cuddle once a week. Lousy experience but at least I learned firsthand what asexuality really is.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ken1988, owlet and majimekun
Des Esseintes said:
I think it's more of a nightmare for her since it is very hard to find a partner who would accept the idea of being with someone with no possibility of sex whatsoever — unless of course that person is also asexual but it's statistically highly improbable.
Click to expand...

Maybe there is a way for some sort of concession on both sides : no penetration but hand/blowjobs OK?

Did you try that route?

Anyway, I know that there are asexual guys also even if they are quite rare.
 
Des Esseintes said:
I think it's more of a nightmare for her since it is very hard to find a partner who would accept the idea of being with someone with no possibility of sex whatsoever — unless of course that person is also asexual but it's statistically highly improbable.
Click to expand...
Maybe there are special dating sites where asexual people can find each other.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ken1988
I don't think asexuality is that rare. After all, most married men are forced into it at some point in their marriages. And many of them somehow survive.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jbagz
DocMcStuffins said:
I don't think asexuality is that rare. After all, most married men are forced into it at some point in their marriages. And many of them somehow survive.
Click to expand...

How they survive is easily explained by the gazillion p4p shops all around the place. So in a way the Japanese housewives did much sooner what the industry then followed; they outsourced the processes they didn't feel comfortable with to third parties. :eek:
 
  • Like
Reactions: AliceInWonderland
DocMcStuffins said:
I don't think asexuality is that rare. After all, most married men are forced into it at some point in their marriages. And many of them somehow survive.
Click to expand...

That's not being asexual then because they still have a libido. They still have a sexuality even if they don't act upon it.

Truly asexual people are people who don't have any sexual desires. That girl was still a virgin at 29 and the thought of ever having sex was completely incongruous to her. She liked to hug and even sometimes kiss but she told me she had never felt any pleasure from being touched anywhere on her body. If we watched a film and I asked her whether she thought the main actor was attractive, she would be unable to answer. She still craved for someone's affection though and for some reason was looking for a male partner.
 
majimekun said:
Maybe there is a way for some sort of concession on both sides : no penetration but hand/blowjobs OK?

Did you try that route?
Click to expand...

If we had an exceptionally good connection that was worth trying to preserve at the expense of having normal sex, I might have tried but since it was only so-so I didn't bother (besides the fact that I would have felt stupid imposing her something that would have felt like work to her).
 
Slightly off-topic:

So just for fun, I tested out Tinder and Happn for the brief period I was in London during this trip, roughly for about an evening and a morning, around Mayfair, Soho, Camden, so for a total of maybe half a day..

And I got only a single match! Of which I ended up being unenthusiastic about! This city though definitely still has a lot of "oomph" though. Attractive women of all ethnicities and many of them have extremely impressive interests, education and professions. It was also probably where I was staying and hanging out as well..

I seldom get either impressed or intimidated by anyone but profiles that read: 32 year old former ballerina doing a post doctorate in microbiology is pretty.. wow. And super hot too. Not even the most impressive one.
 
  • Like
Reactions: AliceInWonderland
You must log in or register to reply here.