Dating Game

[ParisianJin]

Dear All,

I am a french man, recently (6 months ago) arrived to Tokyo for work, mid-30s, athletic,..etc
Trying to learn japanese, now able to communicate basically
Looking for some advice from experienced people here about the dating game.

1) looking for SF, FWB, NSA, ONS, ....
2) target : from 18 to 45 years
3) my experience during these 6 months.
- 17 ladies : from 21 to 42
- 3 gaijin and 14 Japanese
- 3 of the japanese spoke good english the rest was terrible
- 3 (japanese) in real contact (river, dotour, pub) and 14 (japanese and gaijin) from apps (Tinder, okc)
- had sex with 12 over 14

I had 2 to 3 ladies in parallel and used to meet them one a week each and switching for the weekends.
It was tough because most of them wanted a boyfriend and to be honest i was horny and i faked the relationship but at a certain point it was hard to handle, the other were ONS and no real chemistry to keep in touch or bad sex.

The reason i detailed all this, is to show that I did my best to find out SF or FWB (in real, apps) but I keep ending with woman who want a relationship.
It was easier for me in Europe but here i am kind of lost.
You will probably say that the language is a barrier, I do agree and I am actually working on it and learning.
So while improving my japanese I would like to get an advice on :

where is the best place to find SF, FWB ? (any districts, places,...), (any specific app?....)

Thanks in advance

 

[oLUXo]

Dear All,

I am a french man, recently (6 months ago) arrived to Tokyo for work, mid-30s, athletic,..etc
Trying to learn japanese, now able to communicate basically
Looking for some advice from experienced people here about the dating game.

1) looking for SF, FWB, NSA, ONS, ....
2) target : from 18 to 45 years
3) my experience during these 6 months.
- 17 ladies : from 21 to 42
- 3 gaijin and 14 Japanese
- 3 of the japanese spoke good english the rest was terrible
- 3 (japanese) in real contact (river, dotour, pub) and 14 (japanese and gaijin) from apps (Tinder, okc)
- had sex with 12 over 14

I had 2 to 3 ladies in parallel and used to meet them one a week each and switching for the weekends.
It was tough because most of them wanted a boyfriend and to be honest i was horny and i faked the relationship but at a certain point it was hard to handle, the other were ONS and no real chemistry to keep in touch or bad sex.

The reason i detailed all this, is to show that I did my best to find out SF or FWB (in real, apps) but I keep ending with woman who want a relationship.
It was easier for me in Europe but here i am kind of lost.
You will probably say that the language is a barrier, I do agree and I am actually working on it and learning.
So while improving my japanese I would like to get an advice on :

where is the best place to find SF, FWB ? (any districts, places,...), (any specific app?....)

Thanks in advance

Most apps or sites in Japan are for finding relationships or just wasting your time. Yes, still easy to bang, but they want a relationship. You should just find one that you really connect with and just be honest. Tell them you're not ready for a relationship, but still want private time together. It's worked for me for a while until they somehow think we are dating and getting too serious. Still worth a gamble.

 

[ParisianJin]

Thanks man,
Up to now, anytime i said something like : not ready for a relationship, just arrived, too busy with my work (which is true),...etc do not work. It worked when I faked a beginning of relationship.
Anyways, I am still up for any good place where it is possible to meet up.
I would rather avoid the foreigner places like, roppongi, shinjuku,...etc.
If anyone know some quiter area would be great

 

[majimekun]

48 yo here and I have 3 regular sex friends (24yo, 22yo, 37yo).
I speak Japanese almost native level.
None of them are looking for a real relationship with me.
IMHO The only way to find sex friends is via apps or dating sites.
No way you could pick up a random girl in the street and have her become a regular sex friends.

You can match with real sex friends mostly under these circumstances:
- They live only a couple of minutes away from you ( two of mines are 10 mins away )
- They are young (older women who want sex friends are married ones most of the time )
- They are way too busy with work (they have no time for a real relationship and work related stress makes them want to fuck).
- They are either Japanese or Korean ( other Asian nationalities are way too conservative ... with the exception of filipinas but you should avoid them anyway )

If you don't speak good Japanese, you'll only appeal to the ones who want English practice for free and these don't want to fuck anyway.

 

[MikeH]

You can match with real sex friends mostly under these circumstances:

I agree on many points generally but here are my two yens anyway:

- Whatever they say in the beginning most of the girls will end up wanting more than just sex; of course that's maybe just because I am so awesome. So you need to talk them down occasionally.
- Distance isn't a deal breaker; my longest lived around 3 hour trip away. So we met halfway about once a month.
- They are younger than me because I am old, but any age works for me; I am not going to pry their private life like their real names or marital status. Because I am a decent person.
- Everyone over 30 is busy at work; and that's a good thing. I leave the 20 somethings to other people (my hard limit is 26 though )
- You can make friends everywhere you are; as any decent fisherman knows you catch most fish with the lure you are using. In other words if you spend your time in the apps that's where you find your friends; if you are outside in the bars and pubs then you find them there.
- I have had Japanese, Koreans and Chinese; but because I am a small minded racist I also have avoided Philippinas. Because I like my skin without holes.
- Regardless of the nationality you need good level of Japanese; same experience with English speaking ones, they just want free lessons.

 

[Lars Lust]

Now I’m really curious. I never had a Filipina SF, GF or other -F. What have I been missing?

 

[MikeH]

Now I’m really curious. I never had a Filipina SF, GF or other -F. What have I been missing?

Kitchen knife between your ribs?

 

[Sweet as hunny]

I agree on many points generally but here are my two yens anyway:

- Whatever they say in the beginning most of the girls will end up wanting more than just sex; of course that's maybe just because I am so awesome. So you need to talk them down occasionally.
- Distance isn't a deal breaker; my longest lived around 3 hour trip away. So we met halfway about once a month.
- They are younger than me because I am old, but any age works for me; I am not going to pry their private life like their real names or marital status. Because I am a decent person.
- Everyone over 30 is busy at work; and that's a good thing. I leave the 20 somethings to other people (my hard limit is 26 though )
- You can make friends everywhere you are; as any decent fisherman knows you catch most fish with the lure you are using. In other words if you spend your time in the apps that's where you find your friends; if you are outside in the bars and pubs then you find them there.
- I have had Japanese, Koreans and Chinese; but because I am a small minded racist I also have avoided Philippinas. Because I like my skin without holes.
- Regardless of the nationality you need good level of Japanese; same experience with English speaking ones, they just want free lessons.

Well I’m a female looking for a female. FMF

With luck she will be interested in a 3some But I’m having a really hard time finding her because I’m not a guy and girls don’t suspect that I want an intimate woman. Does anyone have any advice?

 

[ParisianJin]

48 yo here and I have 3 regular sex friends (24yo, 22yo, 37yo).
I speak Japanese almost native level.
None of them are looking for a real relationship with me.
IMHO The only way to find sex friends is via apps or dating sites.
No way you could pick up a random girl in the street and have her become a regular sex friends.

You can match with real sex friends mostly under these circumstances:
- They live only a couple of minutes away from you ( two of mines are 10 mins away )
- They are young (older women who want sex friends are married ones most of the time )
- They are way too busy with work (they have no time for a real relationship and work related stress makes them want to fuck).
- They are either Japanese or Korean ( other Asian nationalities are way too conservative ... with the exception of filipinas but you should avoid them anyway )

If you don't speak good Japanese, you'll only appeal to the ones who want English practice for free and these don't want to fuck anyway.

Thanks for the answer buddy,

From my small experience and from what you say I do agree.
Most of what I had is from meeting apps.
Right now, I have a regular 45yo japanese as fuck friend and my last one is a chinese 23yo.

The reason I was asking for dating game is except few I met (the chinese 23yo with amazing body, long legs and like to fuck), is that you find surprises between the photo on the app and the real person.
Sometimes, I try to shorten it and runway.

As for the japanese level, I would love to learn of course, I am already speak in 4 languages but I just arrived (since July 2019), no time to learn due to work and personal life.
I do practice sometimes at work or when meeting/texting with the matches.
So now I can read hiragana, katakana and can distinguish around 100 (but still lost on how to say them)
Main problem for me in Japanese is the logic of the sentence, the particles and the endings depending on the context.

 

[ParisianJin]

I agree on many points generally but here are my two yens anyway:

- Whatever they say in the beginning most of the girls will end up wanting more than just sex; of course that's maybe just because I am so awesome. So you need to talk them down occasionally.
- Distance isn't a deal breaker; my longest lived around 3 hour trip away. So we met halfway about once a month.
- They are younger than me because I am old, but any age works for me; I am not going to pry their private life like their real names or marital status. Because I am a decent person.
- Everyone over 30 is busy at work; and that's a good thing. I leave the 20 somethings to other people (my hard limit is 26 though )
- You can make friends everywhere you are; as any decent fisherman knows you catch most fish with the lure you are using. In other words if you spend your time in the apps that's where you find your friends; if you are outside in the bars and pubs then you find them there.
- I have had Japanese, Koreans and Chinese; but because I am a small minded racist I also have avoided Philippinas. Because I like my skin without holes.
- Regardless of the nationality you need good level of Japanese; same experience with English speaking ones, they just want free lessons.

I mostly agree with you too,
Except that I am really into the very young ones, early 20s
I usually date with japanese, korean, chinese, taiwanese, honkongese, vietnamese.
But to be honest even before you mention the knife in the ribs, I am not attracted at all to philipinas and they are quite a lot on dating apps

I usally also filter them and say from the beginning that I want sex, so if no fuck in the first date I will just skip.

 

[ParisianJin]

Another questions guys,

1) Can you recommend a decent love/fuck hotel
2) Is there some love hotel in less busy places ? I would like to avoid ( Shinjuku, Ikebukuro, Shibuya, Uguisudani, Meguro, Gotanda,...)

 

[MikeH]

Another questions guys,

1) Can you recommend a decent love/fuck hotel
2) Is there some love hotel in less busy places ? I would like to avoid ( Shinjuku, Ikebukuro, Shibuya, Uguisudani, Meguro, Gotanda,...)

There are hotels everywhere. Take a look at couples.jp or happyhotel.jp

The longer you go away from the Yamate-line the bigger and cheaper the rooms will be.

 

[ParisianJin]

Thanks man

 

[sewbed]

What apps are people using to meet?
I’ve used badoo, and found 4 girls that have met for sex. There are mostly foreigners on this app though.
Any recommendations greatly appreciated. Particularly interested if there are any Japanese apps.

 

[Lasagna]

What apps are people using to meet?
I’ve used badoo, and found 4 girls that have met for sex. There are mostly foreigners on this app though.
Any recommendations greatly appreciated. Particularly interested if there are any Japanese apps.

Free ones: Japancupid, Okcupid, Tinder, Bumble
Paid ones: Omiai, Pairs, Tapple

Paid apps are best. Price is steep but in the long run it's worth it.

 

[just4fun]

Free ones: Japancupid, Okcupid, Tinder, Bumble
Paid ones: Omiai, Pairs, Tapple

Paid apps are best. Price is steep but in the long run it's worth it.

Free to look maybe.........

 

[Lasagna]

Free to look maybe.........

On JC you can see the first 7 letters of a message so make sure your LINE ID is 7 chars or less ending with 2 or 3 numbers so they know it's an ID and not a random sentence (for example joey528)

If you open JC in browser (not the app) you can send a message with the subject "Please accept my contact" and then just write your LINE ID. If they don't get it on first try them write a follow up "LINE?" If she is interested she will add you. Works 99% of the time.

This works on all cupid sites. So for Koreancupid make a kakaotalk. For western sites use KIK etc. Make sure all msg apps you use the same ID. This is well known but funny enough it still works after all these years.

For clarification: dont send your ID to random girls. Send interest first and wait till you get interest back. Else you could get suspended if too many ppl report you.

 

[Triforce]

On JC you can see the first 7 letters of a message so make sure your LINE ID is 7 chars or less ending with 2 or 3 numbers so they know it's an ID and not a random sentence (for example joey528)

If you open JC in browser (not the app) you can send a message with the subject "Please accept my contact" and then just write your LINE ID. If they don't get it on first try them write a follow up "LINE?" If she is interested she will add you. Works 99% of the time.

This works on all cupid sites. So for Koreancupid make a kakaotalk. For western sites use KIK etc. Make sure all msg apps you use the same ID. This is well known but funny enough it still works after all these years.

For clarification: dont send your ID to random girls. Send interest first and wait till you get interest back. Else you could get suspended if too many ppl report you.

Thanks for this need to find some fuck friends to fuck regularly.