How to handle falling for your SB?

[Joe2017]

Yeah, try to say that to your SBs to justify not wearing a condom. I guaranty you will be successful and a happy father later on 😂

Indeed. A friend of mine, executive at a Japanese corporation got his SB pregnant. He believed the "you don't need to use a condom because I'm on the pill." Neither his wife nor the corporation understood his contribution to society.

 

[Alice]

Indeed. A friend of mine, executive at a Japanese corporation got his SB pregnant. He believed the "you don't need to use a condom because I'm on the pill." Neither his wife nor the corporation understood his contribution to society.

They should be thankful, with the dropping birth rate.
Might have created a future company employee.

 

[static]

that's kinda what i think/feel might be the case....

and so my next question, has anyone successfully transitioned to this from a semi-SR-like relationship before?

really old thread me to but….

Back in 2022, I met an SB in seeking back in the states. I was apparently the first guy she talked to, and she fell for me over our phone call. She agreed to a stupidly low PPM for my hometown, and we met up a week later and JFC she was a solid dime in my book. So we did our thing for about 3-4 months until she dropped the L word on me. Now, I was feeling it too, but I also had a lot of my own stuff going on, so I never really said it back to her. Fast forward to 2023 and lots and lots of copious dates, and my life exploded. Told her I couldn’t give her an allowance anymore, and basically she said that was fine and she still wanted to keep seeing me.

I decided to move back to Japan, and broke the news to her and she was surprised because she was going to tell me the the same thing as she’s from Japan and was only in the US for college.

So long story short, she and I have been in a vanilla relationship for about a year and a half now…. And it turns out she was already fairly well off and I’m now the SB…. She took me on a pretty crazy vacation that exceeded the allowance I gave her thus far.

Why she’s with an overweight dude twice her age who makes a fraction of what she does, I’ll never know.

 

[Coda87]

Hello everyone, glad to see this thread still going for all these years. But I have another update with my SB.

After 5 1/2 years we finally ended our relationship last week. I would have continued but she wanted to end it. I could sense a difference in her from about 6 months ago. I invited her with me on a trip to Japan. It would have been her first time and she always wanted to go. But to my suprise she didnt end up going with me. I thought that was strange because she was always happy to go with me on vacations. Then the last couple months she was especially distant. I was about to have a serious talk with her to see whats wrong and if she didnt want to see me anymore. But one weekend she cancelled a date. Then when I asked to meetup to talk, she told me she didnt want to continue sugar dating.

I asked her why, and she said that its been so long and not sure where/how the relationship would end and thought it was finally time. To be honest I had the same thought many times. Im not sure if thats the entire truth of why she wanted to end it. Maybe she just got tired like can happen in a regular dating relationship. But I accepted her break up and thanked her for the many years of good times and memories. I also told her how much I would miss her and described the little and big things I would especially about her and being with her. It was super sad and at that point we both started crying. I told her if she ever wanted to have a vanilla relationship, I would be happy, but thats probably just my wishful thinking.
She said and I believe that she really cared about me. I know I cared about her, but I also had romantic feelings.

We broke up before about 6 months after we started. But I remember during that breakup she kept in contact with me via phone/text. And we ended up back together after about a month. But this time she has been silent, no calls/text messages. So I’m thinking its really the end this time.

Needless to say Im heart broken and missing her. But i knew from the start it was a doomed relationship. There is a small hope the she comes back to me someday. But I know thats not realistic.

Not sure if I want to continue sugar dating. It seems like the sugar scene where Im at has changed too. Im not motivated to make the effort to look. It was hard to find her.

I just have to get over the sadness and move on. She was to one thing I could always look forward to ease the stress of other things in my life. Im gonna really miss her company, cute face, and sexy ass.

 

[Ken4fb]

Hello everyone, glad to see this thread still going for all these years. But I have another update with my SB.

After 5 1/2 years we finally ended our relationship last week. I would have continued but she wanted to end it. I could sense a difference in her from about 6 months ago. I invited her with me on a trip to Japan. It would have been her first time and she always wanted to go. But to my suprise she didnt end up going with me. I thought that was strange because she was always happy to go with me on vacations. Then the last couple months she was especially distant. I was about to have a serious talk with her to see whats wrong and if she didnt want to see me anymore. But one weekend she cancelled a date. Then when I asked to meetup to talk, she told me she didnt want to continue sugar dating.

I asked her why, and she said that its been so long and not sure where/how the relationship would end and thought it was finally time. To be honest I had the same thought many times. Im not sure if thats the entire truth of why she wanted to end it. Maybe she just got tired like can happen in a regular dating relationship. But I accepted her break up and thanked her for the many years of good times and memories. I also told her how much I would miss her and described the little and big things I would especially about her and being with her. It was super sad and at that point we both started crying. I told her if she ever wanted to have a vanilla relationship, I would be happy, but thats probably just my wishful thinking.
She said and I believe that she really cared about me. I know I cared about her, but I also had romantic feelings.

We broke up before about 6 months after we started. But I remember during that breakup she kept in contact with me via phone/text. And we ended up back together after about a month. But this time she has been silent, no calls/text messages. So I’m thinking its really the end this time.

Needless to say Im heart broken and missing her. But i knew from the start it was a doomed relationship. There is a small hope the she comes back to me someday. But I know thats not realistic.

Not sure if I want to continue sugar dating. It seems like the sugar scene where Im at has changed too. Im not motivated to make the effort to look. It was hard to find her.

I just have to get over the sadness and move on. She was to one thing I could always look forward to ease the stress of other things in my life. Im gonna really miss her company, cute face, and sexy ass.View attachment 25474

Thank you for sharing. Appreciate it. Good luck with whatever you plan to do in the future.

 

[Cashew]

Hello everyone, glad to see this thread still going for all these years. But I have another update with my SB.

After 5 1/2 years we finally ended our relationship last week. I would have continued but she wanted to end it. I could sense a difference in her from about 6 months ago. I invited her with me on a trip to Japan. It would have been her first time and she always wanted to go. But to my suprise she didnt end up going with me. I thought that was strange because she was always happy to go with me on vacations. Then the last couple months she was especially distant. I was about to have a serious talk with her to see whats wrong and if she didnt want to see me anymore. But one weekend she cancelled a date. Then when I asked to meetup to talk, she told me she didnt want to continue sugar dating.

I asked her why, and she said that its been so long and not sure where/how the relationship would end and thought it was finally time. To be honest I had the same thought many times. Im not sure if thats the entire truth of why she wanted to end it. Maybe she just got tired like can happen in a regular dating relationship. But I accepted her break up and thanked her for the many years of good times and memories. I also told her how much I would miss her and described the little and big things I would especially about her and being with her. It was super sad and at that point we both started crying. I told her if she ever wanted to have a vanilla relationship, I would be happy, but thats probably just my wishful thinking.
She said and I believe that she really cared about me. I know I cared about her, but I also had romantic feelings.

We broke up before about 6 months after we started. But I remember during that breakup she kept in contact with me via phone/text. And we ended up back together after about a month. But this time she has been silent, no calls/text messages. So I’m thinking its really the end this time.

Needless to say Im heart broken and missing her. But i knew from the start it was a doomed relationship. There is a small hope the she comes back to me someday. But I know thats not realistic.

Not sure if I want to continue sugar dating. It seems like the sugar scene where Im at has changed too. Im not motivated to make the effort to look. It was hard to find her.

I just have to get over the sadness and move on. She was to one thing I could always look forward to ease the stress of other things in my life. Im gonna really miss her company, cute face, and sexy ass.View attachment 25474

Thanks for the update! That's a shame it came to an end but these types of relationships tend to always have an expiration date. I always say to myself to just be happy that it happened and you got to experience the good times whenever relationships end. And yes that is indeed a sexy ass.

 

[Ken4fb]

these types of relationships tend to always have an expiration date.

Same for any relationship really. I would say it is more fragile to break at the beginning given how easy it is to get into a new SB/SD relationship.

I always say to myself to just be happy that it happened and you got to experience the good times whenever relationships end. And yes that is indeed a sexy ass.

Totally agree with these.

 

[BigPrickRick]

I've realized as i continue to talk to my SB in Tokyo I won't be able to see for a few months that I have started to develop feelings for her. It's weird because I haven't had romantic feelings for any women in about 4-5 years (slept with a few non p4p women during this time and a bunch of p4p), I only spend a few months a year in Japan and this is obviously a money based relationship. So I know from the start it's だめ haha. I harbor 0 illusions that she feels the same way about me. I get a weird sort of sense of companionship and emotional high when she messages me and I'm really looking forward to seeing her again, but at the same time it's an pretty much the equivalent of like paying to message an OF girl or something (she doesn't work in 風俗 unless she's lyin to me but isn't SB basically 風俗). I'm even considering offering to pay for video call "dates" to just talk and practice my Japanese, which seems like a bad idea. I'm not sure if feeling this way is a good thing or a bad thing because it does add some color to my kind of dreary working life but also I feel like any relationship of this sort can end at any moment which is gonna hurt when it does. Was the best sex I've ever had where money had to change hands and she was just very fun to hang out with even on the non sexual parts of dates. Can't really talk about this with anyone IRL for obvious reasons too haha.

 

[MikeH]

but also I feel like any relationship of this sort can end at any moment which is gonna hurt when it does.

Isn't that true to any good relationship though?

 

[Maxblack]

Enjoy it while it lasts and when it ends, be sad , then move on.

 

[BigPrickRick]

Isn't that true to any good relationship though?

actually now that you mention it, good or bad, pay or not, that has been my experience here haha

 

[Cashew]

I've realized as i continue to talk to my SB in Tokyo I won't be able to see for a few months that I have started to develop feelings for her. It's weird because I haven't had romantic feelings for any women in about 4-5 years (slept with a few non p4p women during this time and a bunch of p4p), I only spend a few months a year in Japan and this is obviously a money based relationship. So I know from the start it's だめ haha. I harbor 0 illusions that she feels the same way about me. I get a weird sort of sense of companionship and emotional high when she messages me and I'm really looking forward to seeing her again, but at the same time it's an pretty much the equivalent of like paying to message an OF girl or something (she doesn't work in 風俗 unless she's lyin to me but isn't SB basically 風俗). I'm even considering offering to pay for video call "dates" to just talk and practice my Japanese, which seems like a bad idea. I'm not sure if feeling this way is a good thing or a bad thing because it does add some color to my kind of dreary working life but also I feel like any relationship of this sort can end at any moment which is gonna hurt when it does. Was the best sex I've ever had where money had to change hands and she was just very fun to hang out with even on the non sexual parts of dates. Can't really talk about this with anyone IRL for obvious reasons too haha.

What made you like her in particular?

 

[hanito]

I'm even considering offering to pay for video call "dates" to just talk and practice my Japanese, which seems like a bad idea.

I feel you. Never thought I would get into SBing, but just hit off with a girl last week after I met her on back to back days, which catapulted her into my ATF ahead of >100 other plays. K pop idol looks and body, great bubbly personality, sexy sultry sex. I’m 33 and she’s 25 so it feels just right too.

Since then, she proactively video calls me at random points in the day, even when waiting for customers in the shop. We do everything from just chill hanging to her being my onlyfans model on call, and boy is she a nympho. I am going to reward her for her time with little gifts, and a good allowance when we meet again next month.

While there is some level of emotional attachment, we’ve settled on an approach of don’t ask don’t tell, just enjoy it for what it is in the moment.

I overheard a guy talking to her, and she abruptly hung up as she felt like it would hurt me, but I reassured her that it’s just her job. Conversely i let slip that I was going to see my okini soon, and that I wanted to try a threesome with her hot friend at the shop, she went a bit cold but snapped out of it real quick that she just doesn’t want to know.

Next couple of dates already planned:
Omakase and overnight at 5 star hotel
3 day music festival
5 day ski and onsen resort, plus Disneyland.

I am fully prepared for it to end anytime, and that’s the beauty in the impermanence and excitement in the unknown. We don’t talk money in concrete terms, we know it exists, but I give it and she gives affection and mind blowing sex in return, works for both of us.

 

[Alice]

I've realized as i continue to talk to my SB in Tokyo I won't be able to see for a few months that I have started to develop feelings for her. It's weird because I haven't had romantic feelings for any women in about 4-5 years (slept with a few non p4p women during this time and a bunch of p4p), I only spend a few months a year in Japan and this is obviously a money based relationship. So I know from the start it's だめ haha. I harbor 0 illusions that she feels the same way about me. I get a weird sort of sense of companionship and emotional high when she messages me and I'm really looking forward to seeing her again, but at the same time it's an pretty much the equivalent of like paying to message an OF girl or something (she doesn't work in 風俗 unless she's lyin to me but isn't SB basically 風俗). I'm even considering offering to pay for video call "dates" to just talk and practice my Japanese, which seems like a bad idea. I'm not sure if feeling this way is a good thing or a bad thing because it does add some color to my kind of dreary working life but also I feel like any relationship of this sort can end at any moment which is gonna hurt when it does. Was the best sex I've ever had where money had to change hands and she was just very fun to hang out with even on the non sexual parts of dates. Can't really talk about this with anyone IRL for obvious reasons too haha.

I feel you. Never thought I would get into SBing, but just hit off with a girl last week after I met her on back to back days, which catapulted her into my ATF ahead of >100 other plays. K pop idol looks and body, great bubbly personality, sexy sultry sex. I’m 33 and she’s 25 so it feels just right too.

Since then, she proactively video calls me at random points in the day, even when waiting for customers in the shop. We do everything from just chill hanging to her being my onlyfans model on call, and boy is she a nympho. I am going to reward her for her time with little gifts, and a good allowance when we meet again next month.

While there is some level of emotional attachment, we’ve settled on an approach of don’t ask don’t tell, just enjoy it for what it is in the moment.

I overheard a guy talking to her, and she abruptly hung up as she felt like it would hurt me, but I reassured her that it’s just her job. Conversely i let slip that I was going to see my okini soon, and that I wanted to try a threesome with her hot friend at the shop, she went a bit cold but snapped out of it real quick that she just doesn’t want to know.

Next couple of dates already planned:
Omakase and overnight at 5 star hotel
3 day music festival
5 day ski and onsen resort, plus Disneyland.

I am fully prepared for it to end anytime, and that’s the beauty in the impermanence and excitement in the unknown. We don’t talk money in concrete terms, we know it exists, but I give it and she gives affection and mind blowing sex in return, works for both of us.

I mean, a sugar relationship without these kind of vibes is basically just p4p.
The illusion of a relationship is kind of the point of sugar dating, I think.

I love both the tension of a short and sexually charged appointment with someone you don’t know anything about, and longer romantic social dates with building a connection.
This kind of stuff is just the most fun addictive thrill.

 

[Nesanku]

Here is an update on my situation. Just as I was coming to terms with this by checking my expectations, accepting the relationship for what it really is, SB drops two more bombs on me.

1)Bomb #1 - She said she is thinking about becoming a stripper/exotic dancer. This was the smaller bomb. Basically I told her, her decision, but be careful in that shady world. I don't like it but at the same time there is some illicit thrill/excitement about it.

2) Bomb #2 - she slipped and said something that let me figure out she saw another SD. We have no agreement about being exclusive. But we did agree to at least let each other know beforehand, if we decide to see another SD/SB. And a few weeks ago she did tell me another SD made her and offer. I asked why she didn't tell me that she accepted and went through with it. But her excuse if you can even call it that, is that she just did not get around to it but was planning to tell me. I suspect, she was afraid to tell me for fear of me bailing out of the arrangement. I was not really angry, but just told her I was hurt and disappointed because I thought I could trust her. She was very remorseful, apologized repeatedly, cried, and it appeared to be all with sincerity. Said she only saw him once. And she promised to let always let me know going forward if she dates other SD. By the way, this disclosure agreement was her idea in the beginning, not mine.

So I decided I'll still continue to see her, and hopefully I can still enjoy our time like before. I'm really attracted to her, sex is crazy good, and we do really get along well. But geez, things are stackin up to make me have second thoughts about her. Hope the bombing is over for now.

You’re kidding yourself if you believe her bullshith. Think with your big head, not with your little head. There are plenty of fish in the ocean here.

 

[Ken4fb]

You’re kidding yourself if you believe her bullshith. Think with your big head, not with your little head. There are plenty of fish in the ocean here.

Wow, did you read the whole thread? Did you realize that was in 2019, and their relationship lasted for 5 and a half years?

It goes to show that each relationship is really unique.

 

[BigPrickRick]

What made you like her in particular?

Aside from the fact that the sex was fantastic. It's that she is either so good at acting interested that it doesn't seem like she's acting or she's not acting. Most of the Papa Katsu girls I saw, felt sort of awkward and job like it was either a dumb game to achieve intimacy or get date money or it was like a fuzoku girl where it was nice but felt fake, but either way it was a performance for a job. Whereas with this girl at first it was like that but the second meeting on it was more like hanging out with a friend and having fun. Of the girls I met she wasn't the hottest, but the sexual and social chemistry were very good. We also went on an overnight Onsen trip that the whole trip together was a pretty fun adventure. I think it's that its the kind of ideal relationship with a girl younger than me and out of my league that I would like to have, but can't really because that's not how life works, and she's good at selling it.

Since then, she proactively video calls me at random points in the day, even when waiting for customers in the shop. We do everything from just chill hanging to her being my onlyfans model on call, and boy is she a nympho. I am going to reward her for her time with little gifts, and a good allowance when we meet again next month.

While there is some level of emotional attachment, we’ve settled on an approach of don’t ask don’t tell, just enjoy it for what it is in the moment.

I am fully prepared for it to end anytime, and that’s the beauty in the impermanence and excitement in the unknown. We don’t talk money in concrete terms, we know it exists, but I give it and she gives affection and mind blowing sex in return, works for both of us.

That sounds like a great relationship. Enjoy it while it lasts I guess is the thing. Are you paying an allowance or do you only pay per a meet?

I mean, a sugar relationship without these kind of vibes is basically just p4p.
The illusion of a relationship is kind of the point of sugar dating, I think.

I love both the tension of a short and sexually charged appointment with someone you don’t know anything about, and longer romantic social dates with building a connection.
This kind of stuff is just the most fun addictive thrill.

I had never done it before until recently and only was really looking for a better way to meet girls I know I like than a soap/dh but it does seem to have more of an emotional component than I was anticipating. Learning as I go.

 

[DireWolf98]

I'm even considering offering to pay for video call "dates" to just talk and practice my Japanese, which seems like a bad idea.

IMO, it's not a good idea and I would advise against going that route.

 

[Strykor]

really old thread me to but….

Back in 2022, I met an SB in seeking back in the states. I was apparently the first guy she talked to, and she fell for me over our phone call. She agreed to a stupidly low PPM for my hometown, and we met up a week later and JFC she was a solid dime in my book. So we did our thing for about 3-4 months until she dropped the L word on me. Now, I was feeling it too, but I also had a lot of my own stuff going on, so I never really said it back to her. Fast forward to 2023 and lots and lots of copious dates, and my life exploded. Told her I couldn’t give her an allowance anymore, and basically she said that was fine and she still wanted to keep seeing me.

I decided to move back to Japan, and broke the news to her and she was surprised because she was going to tell me the the same thing as she’s from Japan and was only in the US for college.

So long story short, she and I have been in a vanilla relationship for about a year and a half now…. And it turns out she was already fairly well off and I’m now the SB…. She took me on a pretty crazy vacation that exceeded the allowance I gave her thus far.

Why she’s with an overweight dude twice her age who makes a fraction of what she does, I’ll never know.

Were you quite attractive when you were SD for her? And young like 30s or younger or something?

Kind of crazy for the SB who is supposed to be detached to fall in love.

All I can say is this whole p4p thing 99% of the time both parties are detached and should bethat way, but people are human and sometimes someone just clicks with someone on a personal level just because you put money on the table doesn't remove the humanity like some crazy people seem to think about prostitutes.

After all that money is literally pieces of paper representing resources. It can mean nothing in the blink of an eye with a sudden hyperinflation or catastrophe etc.