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International Party?

Did you try? Or just scan the room, see a bad ratio, and give up without even giving it a shot?

If you would have more chance on the streets, did you go out and do it? Or just use the greener grass of the streets which you didn't approach on either to justify leaving the party where you didn't want to approach?

Remember the battle is against yourself, not other dudes. It's about what you did not what you imagined or thought might be the case from a distance without actually trying it. For all you know those girls were bored to death by the six dudes talking to them and were waiting for someone real to come along
No I didn't as my friends had other plans, I totally get your point .. So far I have made two "approaches" both resulted in a hello and then run away lol.. On the plus side I don't think I annoyed anyone
 
there were like 6 guys around each girl.. i think i would have more chance out on the streets, it was the shibuya one

Also realize that just because there's 6 guys around one girl doesn't mean you can't get the girl. Go up, talk to some of the guys, engage the group and eventually isolate the girl. Don't try and out do the other guys, just be social and be inclusive with everyone in the group. It can be difficult to pull off, but its not like every situation is going to be perfectly ideal for gaming your girl of choice; street or not. I remember walking down center-gai one night and a guy in my group liked a girl inside a group of like 10-12 people. He and I went in together, and I occupied the other 9 people allowing him to talk to the girl he wanted to talk to. I think he even got her number from that encounter (don't remember). I never thought that being an English teacher and having to occupy a room full of uninterested people would have become relevant with game. =P
 
In my limited experience women who hang out exclusively with men are damaged goods, but to each his own.
 
In my limited experience women who hang out exclusively with men are damaged goods, but to each his own.
We're talking about a girl who goes to a party with a bad ratio and is surrounded by men. This has no bearing on her social circle, or even any evidence indicative of her social circle.

Besides, there's no reason to be judgmental about the girl that others are attracted to. Different strokes for different folks. If she's not your cup of tea, don't talk to her :)
 
In my limited experience women who hang out exclusively with men are damaged goods, but to each his own.

In my limited experience, men who treat or think of women as "goods" in the first place face an uphill struggle with relating with women
 
I wouldn't put much emphasis on "damaged goods" as its a set phrase used about people:

Someone who was once healthy and/or normal but isn't anymore due to unfortunate, traumatic events in his/her life (i.e. physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, drug abuse...u get it).

Then again, it wasn't long ago that people were defending the use of the term "pinks" in reference to women.
 
In my limited experience, men who treat or think of women as "goods" in the first place face an uphill struggle with relating with women
Not sure how that squares with selling tips to marks with wallets as fat as their heads. (n)
 
We're talking about a girl who goes to a party with a bad ratio and is surrounded by men.
And she chooses to stay because?
 
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i think if more girls knew it was like that...more would have come.. I told one of my friends about it who is a girl and she was like I AM DEFINITELY GOING NEXT TIME ARE THERE JAPANESE GUYS THERE lol
 
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I think a lot of Japanese women know exactly what it's like, so stay away. If they wanted to go somewhere and have every desperate gaijin tourist hit on them, they'd just hang around outside Shinjuku station, or in a Hub (if reading these forums is to be believed).

Whilst some women certainly are looking for short term action, there are many places with better quality potential dates for them than international parties.
 
And she chooses to stay because?
Because not everyone hate to talk to men.
Why would someone go to an international party? Kanaaaaaaa? Maybe she just wants to practise her English and doesn't care if it's with men or women.
Maybe she likes foreigners and doesn't have chance to meet them in her daily life.

Who are you to judge about other people anyway?
No one is normal and we all got a little damaged by life in one way or the other.
 
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i think if more girls knew it was like that...more would have come.. I told one of my friends about it who is a girl and she was like I AM DEFINITELY GOING NEXT TIME ARE THERE JAPANESE GUYS THERE lol
Haha, probably.
A more men than women ratio... How about making it a gangbang sexparty in another venue? :p
 
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And she chooses to stay because?
Because *gasp* she wants to get laid? She likes being the center of attention? She likes meeting new people? She wants to practice her English? She wants to be entertained? She wants these 6 nubs to spend their money on drinks (assuming it wasn't free drinks)? She wants more orbiters in her daily life? She's trying to network with other people in a situation where she's got the higher social status to help her get ahead in her career? Maybe she's trying to get a gang bang? Reasons-a-plenty! And even then, why does she need a reason to want to stay?

All of these are regular, healthy human behaviors, I have no idea how you think otherwise.

On the other hand, do you think that a guy who talks to groups of women at parties are damaged as well?

Not sure how that squares with selling tips to marks with wallets as fat as their heads. (n)
No PUA thinks of women as a good or commodity, even those that offer classes. The mere fact that you try and equate those two shows your ignorance on the subject.

Anyhow, that's enough derailing out of you.

Whilst some women certainly are looking for short term action, there are many places with better quality potential dates for them than international parties.
It depends on what you're into really. I've known several girls who have gone to live in other countries, come back and find that they don't quite fit into Japanese society anymore. I don't think that's bad on them really, especially with how closed the society is in general. Those types of women (hell, people in general), international thinkers, open mindedness, etc typically don't fit in that well into Japanese society and are going places where there are other like-minded people. A lot of these girls typically start at IP's for meeting people, then branching out from there.

I've met a lot of really amazing women at IP's, HUB, Roppongi bars, etc and I would never begrudge anyone for going to an IP if that's the kind of girl they're looking for. I would only begrudge someone who goes there because it's "easy for a quick lay" and isn't pushing themselves to get the kind of girls they really want.
 
.. those actually happen? invite me please!
Not sure if this ever happened at an international party and i don't have that much experiences with big groups.
I know Bali An has party rooms that accept big groups... And in happening bars sometimes thing... Happen. But i've never seen super large groups going at it in happening bars. Usually two swinging couples or a girl with two guys.
Not sure how popular group sex is in Japan but i know gangbangs are popular in Germany.
 
I've been to a couple of gaitomos before. It's a bit hit and miss depending on location I think.
Sometimes you get some ultra cute girls there in their late 20s. There was once there was this really cute petite Japanese girl there; she said she was like 19/20 years learning esute... The gaikokujins just flocked around her.
The most interesting thing I found was that the Japanese guys sometimes pretend to be foreigners there to talk to chicks. There were these two guys in another separate gaitomo I went to who claimed they were from Taiwan and Korea. My friend I brought along with me spoke mandarin and basically called their bluff when they couldn't reply. Pretty hilarious
 
I have never been to one of these parties but i think they sound like a great option for meeting new people. It can be very hard at first when you get here to make connections on a plutonic level; especially when you are new to the language and culture too.

I am sure there are a lot of gaijin hunters and yellow fever freaks there but they have a right to happiness don't you think so?


Anyway i reckon this is not really a thread for this subforum would be better in a general section or dating and relationships; though i guess any thread is welcome in the nanpa section now that it is a graveyard due to mods failure to keep out the troll population.
 
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A bit late to post in this thread but I will anyway. I've been to more than a couple of these. The one time I went to a gaitomo sponsored one, it was like the others have said in this thread: more guys being there than girls. The few girls were always surrounded by guys; it was hard to truly engage them and try to pull them to go drink somewhere else more private. However I also concur that it is not impossible: my friend who I always went with to these kind of parties was able to go out with two girls (on separate occasions) and sleep with them. From that one time we went to gaitomo. Compared to me he had all this pickup thing figured out so it really set him apart from the other guys flocking the girls.

On other occasions, it really is a hit and miss. There was one time where the venue was packed, felt like I was inside a subway car during the build up to rush hour. And with a good ratio too! We were able to engage a group of two girls, and we managed to get them to come with us to karaoke. It was prime time too as Japanese guys (whom we actually befriended earlier in the same venue) were trying to get the girls away from us @.@
 
Who are you to judge about other people anyway?
No one is normal and we all got a little damaged by life in one way or the other.
Also read what I wrote:
In my limited experience women who hang out exclusively with men are damaged goods, but to each his own.
I only have a sample size of a few dozen Japanese women who fit this profile, so I qualified my statement accordingly.
 
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The international parties are often highly overrated, lots of exaggeration about any sexual escapades (as often few of any), and many Japanese women are overly defensive and paranoid.

Many xenophobic or jealous people/groups will speak badly about foreign men to scare the women going there, while at the same time and strangely, there is often a high percentage of Japanese guys coming. Sometimes under the presumption it's "easier" to get/meet women from there, and trying hard to compete or block foreign guys at the "international" party. Ridiculous.

It also depends on who is organizing the party and the location. Believe or not, some of the organizers are unbelievably anti-foreigner (have talked to such), and are just out to get money. Be careful of such. Those can be the odd parties full of Japanese guys acting strangely and Japanese women acting afraid of their shadow and full of fear, based on being told all kinds of horror stories and directed to simply "chat only" and not become friends with foreign guys. Some international parties also use "sakura" style women, who are friends of the organizer, and simply there to bait men and make the party appear to be good. Old Japanese style trick used at many bars.

If you go the international party route, would suggest trying a variety of different organizations and locations. Then settle on those that work best for you.

I look at international parties as more of an opportunity for foreign guys to practice approaching and speaking to Japanese women (using both Japanese and English). To learn how the flow of the conversation with Japanese women can possibly go and how they react. Then you can take that skill outside to other situations such as clubs, trains, coffee shops, etc...
 
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i have only been to an international party once, when a friend of mine wanted to meet foreigners for some discussion about world politics (no joke, dude studies politics and philosophy), so i joined and was of course expecting the worst party ever...
in the end it wasnt even the sausage fest everybody expects it to be, i would say it was 40% women and 60% percent men, all between 20 and mid 40s, maybe some dudes have been late 40s...
we even got in touch with 2 girls pretty fast and there was no flirting, or anything like that involved... i might have just been lucky, though i guess thanks to my friend we had good company later...
as for the rest, sure my friend was probably the only person there naive enough to believe that there are people who are not looking for ons/sf/a partner, but to me it didnt seem much different from any other club...
i just tend not to go, because usually im in trouble pretty fast at events like this and i cant stand the music...

im also sure those parties dont have the best reputation, but thats also most of the time foreigners bashing other foreigners, which i never really understood... but apparently it is their japan and not mine, so who am i to say anything about it...
a former coworker explained his disdain for international parties to me years ago, his problem was that because the only thing that makes foreigners special is being foreign, otherwise they all have the same interests, hobbies, jobs and so on, so the more foreigners there are, the less possible it gets to score with japanese women, to which i replied, that i would be very happy to have a foreign friend, who shares remotely the same taste and the same interests and that he should be glad to meet like minded people... looks like some people are happy enough already and prefer to remain on their cloud...

so at the end of the day i also think those parties are not as bad as they think for most people and its maybe also hit and miss...
good advice from solong, though, if you manage to be on one of the horrible ones, just practise and try somewhere else...
 
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I have yet to find a place where I am surrounded by beautiful eligible young women who are all interested in yours truly.. If I ever find it.. Im sure as hell not telling anyone else about it ;)
 
well i think that that happened also because my friend just didnt give them the chance to flirt, or do anything else... i do remember that one of the two seemed to be very interested in him, which he didnt notice at all... i was busy killing the bar, though...
 
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