@static Thanks for the tips. I'll try more standing back. How about shaving? Is it better as a foreigner to be completely shaved? Also, taking a uniqlo model wouldn't make me look a bit Japanese-ish? Is that a good thing? (I've genuinely been wondering about that; I do like these looks though)
Btw reading the
https://tokyoadultguide.com/threads/favourite-anti-pua-methods.12593 thread was interesting, I can't answer in the topic but I'd find her methods to avoid contact disrespectful and inefficient. You know you have a voice and can tell when you're not interested, no need to avoid contact in weird ways and make your journey as well as the man's unconfortable for a big while, thinking he's supposed to get the 'hint'. Perhaps that's what happens in the street, but I really don't feel good against this kind of reactions. It's also pretty killing from women because they imply any attempt at hitting on any girl is socially unacceptable and that you're unworthy of a second of her time, instead of it being wrong *now* with her (I'd wish those girls never got approached anymore the next time they're single, just like they behave).
Recently again twice I did a compliment and walked away, and at first she seemed nice, then looked at me and expressed disgust. This morning too, I asked to the girl standing next to me if the coming train was going to Shibuya at the station and at first she answered with a smile and right away she took that same creep face (without me adding anything). I told another compliment to another one in the street about her funny design shoes while walking and got no answer and a patronizing face. I might be reassured that walking to girls in the street is not creepy in itself, but the way I do it apparently is, so I'll stop the massacre for a while.
Gonna try breaking this down into basic points:
1) There are types where being different from a girl's world can be useful, making you stand out from the crowd, also called "peacocking." This can be a useful technique when the environment calls for it. The reason I recommend you tailor your fashion more towards the way Japanese people dress is because right now, girls are thinking you're creepy. What you need to work on right now is building comfort with the girl, and by appearing outside of her impression of men is something that won't accomplish this. Most of the time you can accomplish this by adjusting your style of game over time, you can adjust your fashion overnight and *help* the problem a little bit by spending a little bit of cash and time. Remember, you can pick up a girl looking like a hobo if your game is strong enough, but that doesn't mean you should try it.
2) Shaving is kind of up to you. What's important is whether you look hygienic and clean. Facial hair isn't bad, but if you look like a scraggly mess, then it can be a turn off to girls. Personally, I shave everything but not because of girls, I shave down because summer time is humid as hell, and body hair traps odor and sweat making me go through more shirts than i really want. It has the added bonus of keeping me fresh smelling for longer though
.
3) Think about yourself when you're walking around and someone asks you a question. You're not paying attention to everything, then all of the sudden you've got someone trying to get your attention. You probably don't even hear what the other person is saying initially, and you get that daze before you're actually aware of them. Empathize with the girl in that regard. Figure that she probably didn't even truly comprehend what you said and she's just answering on autopilot. Picture this conversation string:
You - "Excuse me, does this train go to Shibuya?"
Her - "Yea"
You - "Yea, I was thinking of opening a pizza shop inside the station."
Her - "Yea-... wait what?"
She's not really aware of what you're saying until she processes it a few seconds later. Thing is, your words are largely meaningless. Picture your words as a vehicle, simply carrying your emotions and true feelings to the girl. This is how most women communicate, by reading sub-communications. Guys translate words, we're more "logical" in that respect. Of course if you say something like "I'm going to rape you at the next alleyway," her logical brain is going to understand that and react accordingly. We're talking in the context of normal communication. If you're nervous, she's nervous. If you're feeling creepy, she'll think you're creepy, etc.
Now, what you're typing here as far as what you've said doesn't appear to be anything wrong, I think we've all opened girls in the same way, yet I don't think I've ever gotten a "creepy" reaction from the girl. It tells me something is going on with the WAY you're saying it, or what you're feeling while you say it, or the way you're posture and body language are coming off to the girl, thus why most of the advice I gave you was focusing on body language and appearance. Without knowing more about the non-verbals, I can't really advise you much beyond that.
Ok that I just don't understand. See how quickly girls (usually) walk? How do you get seen by them without stopping them, not bumping in the others if you keep walking ("free path anxiety"), sometimes get her to remove her headphones or stuff, find something fun to tell her that is not related to her looks, while needing to go for numbers? Do you stop them? What kind of things can you tell to a walking girl whose you know only the looks and hasn't got that much different from the others than …… well, looks? Should I go English? My Japanese is definitely lacking impact, or might even be creepy (like the typical "do you want to go play with me?" which sounds like a pedophile from J-boys trying to hit on EU-girls) but as I said on another topic I hate doing this exercise in English
I wonder whether that's an area where I can improve: I usually have good results when I really like the girl (there's something special about her and I feel it and it becomes sincere). But then I can wander a whole hour and not be sure to find one of those.
Do you have videos of people doing it? There's a world of difference between what I'd get in France or here, so there must be some (even slight) differences between how it's done here. Thanks a lot for your answers in any case!
If you want the nerdy explanation, you want to look at what's called "pacing and leading" in NLP. Basically, what you're doing is you start by matching her pace and her aura, then once you're in sync, you start leading it in a different direction. In practice, walk fast, talk to her while you're matching her pace. Once she's interested, start slowing down your pace and she will match your pace until you come to a stop and start talking. Aliester Crawley, in an interview once, walked next to a guy for a block or two, matching his pace. Eventually when he had *control* over the other guy's aura, he stumbled and tripped, and the guy he was shadowing also stumbled and tripped. Back then, we called this "magic." Now, we applied terms to it in NLP. There are countless examples of this, as this is the foundation of hypnosis and other mind-hacks.
As far as not bumping into people, if you walk standing straight and not looking at people in front of you, most people will avoid bumping into you. Don't look at people, look past people. Another book about the art of invisibility says that if you look someone straight in the eyes, their natural reaction is to look away, meaning they're not going to perceive you and will look away, thus bumping into you. If they're the ones to do this, they'll usually take action to move (Usually, this doesn't work 100% of the time =P)
As for language, speak whatever you're comfortable with. Hell, I'd use French ( I think you mentioned that you're french) and see what happens. One of the dumbest approaches I do that usually gets a reaction is that I know how to say "Do you speak <insert language>" in probably 8 different languages. So I'll start in English, then say in Japanese "Oh, you don't speak English, do you speak Japanese?" She ignores. Then I'll switch to spanish, then to french, then to chinese, then to german and just go down the list. A lot of girls will eventually get interested or laugh their asses off. Say something in French and if a girl responds with "Sorry, I don't speak English" (as I said above, they're not actually hearing what you're saying, they're answering on autopilot and will assume foreigner = English), you can say in Japanese "That wasn't English, that was French!" which will usually catch her a little bit off guard and get you a few seconds of attention. After that, continue the conversation in Japanese. Tell her your Japanese isn't very good, laugh a little in an embarrassed way, and she'll possibly give you a little leeway in your Japanese lacking impact. Remember man, you speak your native language, English, Japanese and whatever else you speak. You're talking to some 20 year old who probably failed English class, and even if she did pass, she probably couldn't put together a sentence to save her life. Have some confidence in yourself and what you've accomplished. I mean, you're a foreigner living in another country. Most people in the world never move more than 100 miles from where they were born! Most people in the world don't even have a passport, much less have multiple stamps in it. Give yourself some credit for that! Don't think about it in terms of pumping your ego, but give yourself credit for having more bravery to up and move to a completely foreign country, into a culture completely different to your own; that takes some serious cajones.