Terrible Dad Jokes Thread

[namae]

What can you make with two bananas?

A pair of slippers.

 

[IchigoDave]

Why did the golfer change his pants?

He got a hole-in-one.

 

[IchigoDave]

What’s the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike?

Attire!

 

[IchigoDave]

What do you call a fish with no eye?


Fsh

 

[namae]

What do you call a friend with an elephant on his head?

A flatmate.


( Explanatory Notes :
Flat = apartment
Mate = friend
Flatmate = roommate)

 

[Ken1988]

Why SA is so keen on hiring the Japanese PM for marketing?

Because he is the Suga Daddy.

 

[shadowboxer]

What do you call a lawyer who can cook?

A sue chef!

 

[IchigoDave]

Why did the old man fall in the well?

Because he couldn't see that well!

 

[Ken1988]

Why the Japanese believe that a panel discussion should be very brief?

Because then you and your partner can go to the room quicker.

 

[Durg50]

Why the Japanese believe that a panel discussion should be very brief?

Because then you and your partner can go to the room quicker.

Dont think dad jokes can include love hotel references.

 

[shadowboxer]

 

[namae]

What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot? A walkie-talkie.

 

[UnicornHunter]

I failed math so many times, I can't even count....

 

[IchigoDave]

I had a dream I was floating in an ocean of orange soda. It was a fanta sea.

 

[UnicornHunter]

I had a dream I was floating in an ocean of orange soda. It was a fanta sea.

You Crushed that one!

 

[Nikkei Guy]

Not really a dad joke...

My wife told me I should be more in touch with my feminine side.

So I went out and crashed the car.

Then I ignored her all day for no reason.

 

[Nikkei Guy]

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?


Carrot

 

[just4fun]

I met a gal once who was Saiko.

 

[IchigoDave]

I recently got fired from my job at the M&M factory for throwing away all the W’s.

 

[UnicornHunter]

Cat puns freak meowt.
I'm not kitten!

 

[IchigoDave]

Dad memes

 

[Frenchy]

Dad memes

View attachment 16189 View attachment 16190 View attachment 16191

wow, you’re on fire this morning Champ!

 

[IchigoDave]

wow, you’re on fire this morning Champ!

It’s all I have to offer of late.

 

[MelissaAnne]

What did the mermaid wear to math class?

An algaebra.

 

[Sudsy]

A chemist froze himself at -273.15°C.

Everyone said he was crazy

But in the end he was 0K.