Two random nights in Osaka - what the F should I do with myself?

[dolceandbanana]

Hey gang, decided to jump on the shinkansen on a whim this morning and booked two nights at a hotel in Osaka just go get a change of scenery. Haven't been down here in like 3-4 years and had mostly only come here for work stuff, so I am at a complete loss over what to occupy myself with. The SOE is obviously in effect until 20th, but a lot of places in Tokyo were openly flouting it so I assume it's the same here (Osakans are heathens, so I suspect even more so - right Keihan?). Where do the horny OLs go after work during a pandemic? Is tobita even open? Any bars that I can sneak into after 8pm? Anyone wanna link for some tag teaming?

 

[dolceandbanana]

Good God, the subway is a rolling corona incubator. Do these savages not turn the aircon on until August?

 

[MikeH]

Tobita should be open but closes at 8PM like all restaurants.

 

[Frenchy]

Answer is in the question, I guess

 

[Keihan]

Hey gang, decided to jump on the shinkansen on a whim this morning and booked two nights at a hotel in Osaka just go get a change of scenery. Haven't been down here in like 3-4 years and had mostly only come here for work stuff, so I am at a complete loss over what to occupy myself with. The SOE is obviously in effect until 20th, but a lot of places in Tokyo were openly flouting it so I assume it's the same here (Osakans are heathens, so I suspect even more so - right Keihan?). Where do the horny OLs go after work during a pandemic? Is tobita even open? Any bars that I can sneak into after 8pm? Anyone wanna link for some tag teaming?

Sorry I missed this one and I'm assuming you're back in the civilized world by now, but to be perfectly honest I wouldn't even know where to begin as I have no idea how Osakans are handling the SOE. A couple of Osaka girls I know living here stateside have gone back to Osaka for the summer and one mentioned that people still weren't taking the situation seriously, hence the numbers. According to accounts here, Tobita is definitely open with limited hours. Otherwise, I wouldn't even want to venture a guess how the sly hole-in-the-wall establishments in Umeda, Minami-ward or otherwise are handling this.

Honestly, if you teleported me to Osaka right now and forced me to spend two days there, I'd probably just book a hotel near Kyobashi/OBP/Osaka-jo, spend my mornings jogging around the Castle keeping an eye out for underground porn shoots, lunch at Miyako Soba and strolling around Kyobashi feeling nostalgic, and then hopping on the Loop down to Tennoji/Imamiya and spending the entire afternoon at SpaWorld, sitting bareass naked in the lounge, getting fucked up on the SuperDry/Edamame snack packs and then lounging around outside at the rotenburo feeling useless.

There's just something about Osaka that makes you not want to do anything of any use or substance. Seriously, some days when I'm back in town, by lunch I'm so fucking bored and tired of being back that I just go back to my hotel room, shotgun a few Asahi tallboys and a couple of those 9% chu-hais and sleep until the sun goes down and/or I feel obligated to wake up, go out and get shitfaced somewhere. Unless I'm seeing old friends, I'm basically killing time until I can get back on the Shinkansen and go somewhere better.

 

[dolceandbanana]

Sorry I missed this one and I'm assuming you're back in the civilized world by now, but to be perfectly honest I wouldn't even know where to begin as I have no idea how Osakans are handling the SOE. A couple of Osaka girls I know living here stateside have gone back to Osaka for the summer and one mentioned that people still weren't taking the situation seriously, hence the numbers. According to accounts here, Tobita is definitely open with limited hours. Otherwise, I wouldn't even want to venture a guess how the sly hole-in-the-wall establishments in Umeda, Minami-ward or otherwise are handling this.

Honestly, if you teleported me to Osaka right now and forced me to spend two days there, I'd probably just book a hotel near Kyobashi/OBP/Osaka-jo, spend my mornings jogging around the Castle keeping an eye out for underground porn shoots, lunch at Miyako Soba and strolling around Kyobashi feeling nostalgic, and then hopping on the Loop down to Tennoji/Imamiya and spending the entire afternoon at SpaWorld, sitting bareass naked in the lounge, getting fucked up on the SuperDry/Edamame snack packs and then lounging around outside at the rotenburo feeling useless.

There's just something about Osaka that makes you not want to do anything of any use or substance. Seriously, some days when I'm back in town, by lunch I'm so fucking bored and tired of being back that I just go back to my hotel room, shotgun a few Asahi tallboys and a couple of those 9% chu-hais and sleep until the sun goes down and/or I feel obligated to wake up, go out and get shitfaced somewhere. Unless I'm seeing old friends, I'm basically killing time until I can get back on the Shinkansen and go somewhere better.

Osaka apparently got hit hard as fuck by covid. It was a mess, way worse than usual. All the old shotengai that were previously ~50-60% occupancy are now like 5%. Way more homeless than I remember last visit pre pandemic. People were way more sober, and thus way more xenophobic and awkward than I recall. Even the massagie massagie girls in the usual spots looked haggard as fuck. Osaka truly is the asshole of Japan, never going back unless I have to for work.