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What’s the most culturally insensitive thing you ever said to your partner in bed?

Frenchy

Peace, Love and Camembert
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I know, weird topic , but I have time to waste and again had another Pink Panther (or rather OSS117, for those in the know) moment recently about just that.

so PhilSB was riding yours truly and saying various sweet (I suppose) things in Tagalog and usually I like that but dunno why... was not in the mood this time and it started to bother me.

so out of nowhere I suddenly blurt out “Stop talking to me in ... Arabic!” . She looked at me quite shocked and then exploded in laughter. I lost my erection but hey, its better than getting strangled or whatever. I heard bad things about Filipinas if they’re really pissed off.

So here you go.. what were your own OSS117 moments with a lady (or a guy , or anything inbetween ) in bed?

(an excerpt here to show you how totally politically incorrect and dumb this French pseudo-James Bond parody can be... this part makes me laugh each time, cannot help it).

 
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I know, weird topic , but I have time to waste and again had another Pink Panther (or rather OSS117, for those in the know) moment recently about just that.

so PhilSB was riding yours truly and saying various sweet (I suppose) things in Tagalog and usually I like that but dunno why... was not in the mood this time and it started to bother me.

so out of nowhere I suddenly blurt out “Stop talking to me in ... Arabic!” . She looked at me quite shocked and then exploded in laughter. I lost my erection but hey, its better than getting strangled or whatever. I heard bad things about Filipinas if they’re really pissed off.

So here you go.. what were your own OSS117 moments with a lady (or a guy , or anything inbetween ) in bed?

(an excerpt here to show you how totally politically incorrect and dumb this French pseudo-James Bond parody can be... this part makes me laugh each time, cannot help it).



Reminds me of a hotel where I stayed in during a visit to Indonesia! Fortunately, the hotel was girl-friendly. Unfortunately, it was way too close to an especially loud mosque.
 
You should have accepted the challenge and seen if you couldn't make the girl(s) scream louder.
Then the muezzin would have barged into their room to silence her! :)

By the way don’t assume OSS is only a dumbwit with muslims, he acts pretty much the same with Jews, hippies, women, Americans , Chinese...

I love the way he’s tracking an ex-Nazi war criminal in Brazil: going to the German embassy and asking seriously if they have a list of the local Nazi associations.

 
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I used the "m-word" in bed with a Japanese girl and she said, "No! You must never use that word with a Japanese lady!" That relationship didn't last long. :p
 
I used the "m-word" in bed with a Japanese girl and she said, "No! You must never use that word with a Japanese lady!" That relationship didn't last long. :p
I have honestly no idea which word it could be... Mama?
 
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I understand I am very late to the game, but I was in shock for days just a couple of weeks ago when I discovered Filthy Frank and Joji are one and the same….
 
I understand I am very late to the game, but I was in shock for days just a couple of weeks ago when I discovered Filthy Frank and Joji are one and the same….

Yup. Frank and his buddies were also responsible for starting the viral Harlem Shake videos back in 2013. He moved away from comedy a few years ago to do R&B music. Not my thing, but he sounds pretty good.

 
I used the "m-word" in bed with a Japanese girl and she said, "No! You must never use that word with a Japanese lady!" That relationship didn't last long. :p

You should have used the honorific o-prefix.
 
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You should have used the honorific o-prefix.

I'm pretty sure I did, but she was just too uptight. Reminds me of this one time I was walking back from lunch with a gaijin co-worker when he stopped to ask these little old Japanese ladies selling traditional sweets if they contained "anko" (red bean paste), but he used the wrong word. :eek: After her initial shock, she replied that they did not contain any anko.
 
I'm pretty sure I did, but she was just too uptight. Reminds me of this one time I was walking back from lunch with a gaijin co-worker when he stopped to ask these little old Japanese ladies selling traditional sweets if they contained "anko" (red bean paste), but he used the wrong word. :eek: After her initial shock, she replied that they did not contain any anko.

That sounds kind of dangerous. What if he asked if they sell any and they answer "yeah, surely for a hulk like you".

I mean I have been raised properly so I would not be able to leave a damsel in distress.
 
I used the "m-word" in bed with a Japanese girl and she said, "No! You must never use that word with a Japanese lady!" That relationship didn't last long. :p

Makes them feel old? "Mommy".
 
Speaking of old..............
 
Another Indonesian story from many years ago. Not sure how the topic even came up in conversation, but I once casually mentioned to an Indonesian bar girl that I had sampled dog in Korea. She was really shocked at the idea of eating dog meat.

Admittedly, many Westerners would also repel at the notion of dog restaurants. In her case, the common Muslim dislike of dogs might have been a factor. Not all Indonesians are Muslims, but many are including even some bar girls. Of course, she wasn’t wearing a headscarf.

Can’t recall if we tried doggie style...
 
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Can’t recall if we tried doggie style...

That reminds me of a Malaysian nurse I met at a bar and who I then woke up the next day. She casually mentions something which made some connections on my tiny brain and I go "Oh, you are Muslim? I thought you guys don't..." at which point she interrupted me "I am a Muslim but I am not an idiot".

I almost answered "well that's debatable, not because of the sex but because it was with me" but for once I was able to keep my mouth shut.
 
Nothing like being in a small and romantic hotel in Italian Tuscany with my ex-wife in our first year of honey, right next to the Catholic church that rang the clock bells every hour and every fifteen minutes.
 
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But the worst was a few years later. I met a beautiful Arab girl in a private club in Casablanca. She came with me to the hotel and after a good sex session she looked at me seriously and she said "Well, now you have to marry me. Tomorrow I'll introduce you to my family." My face must have been so scared, because she immediately said ... “I'm kidding!”.
 
But the worst was a few years later. I met a beautiful Arab girl in a private club in Casablanca. She came with me to the hotel and after a good sex session she looked at me seriously and she said "Well, now you have to marry me. Tomorrow I'll introduce you to my family." My face must have been so scared, because she immediately said ... “I'm kidding!”.

ah ah! Yeah Moroccans are probably the most “cool” with it, among arab countries. But my very modest experience in the muslim world was that Indonesia/Malaysia are the safest and I found Turkey (well, Istanbul at least) rather open minded too. And Dubai doesn’t really count