What do Japanese friends/coworkers/neighbors think

[inaka]

Outside of close friends, do you feel cautious or secretive about other Japanese people knowing you dip into pink salons, soaplands, etc? If a Japanese coworker saw you coming out of an establishment could that become a problem for you with your job? (and does it depend on the job?)

I have heard of after work spilling over into "snacks" and hostess clubs, but is that the limit?

I just realized there is a pinsaro not far from a school I work at (just) 4 times a year, and it got me thinking about this.

 

[MikeH]

I just realized there is a pinsaro not far from a school I work at (just) 4 times a year, and it got me thinking about this.

Schools would fire you on the spot if anyone notices you coming out of a pink salon. Businesses it depends what kind of a place it is, cheap one with old girls you'd get high fived for bravery, more upscale place with young girls you get promoted.

 

[Sudsy]

If a Japanese coworker saw you coming out of an establishment could that become a problem for you with your job? (and does it depend on the job?)

As an HR person I can comment.

Most companies have a moral behaviour clause in their rules of employment, and being caught coming out of a fuzoku establishment would be a clear violation of such.

Of course, for any discipline to take place, it would also have to be proven, so if your colleague didn’t take a photo it would be your word against his/hers.

It would further only be a serious offence if you were identifiable as an employee, wearing a uniform or a company pin, for example.

 

[MikeH]

Of course, for any discipline to take place, it would also have to be proven, so if your colleague didn’t take a photo it would be your word against his/hers.

Just be sure the only coworkers who could even theoretically see you also come to the shop with you and there are no problems. That's what I did when we were travelling in a group.

 

[Frenchy]

I’d rather not know what my neighbors think... but they change often anyway

As for colleagues , not sure. On the opposite we also have strong guidelines about protecting employees’ private lives. The one who may be fired or sued is the one who snitches, in fact...
as long as there is no impact on job performance, and company funds , name cards etc are not used, then what I do with my dick is not their business

 

[MikeH]

then what I do with my dick is not their business

That would be the reasonable assumption. So from that you already know it won't apply to Japanese companies.

 

[Frenchy]

That would be the reasonable assumption. So from that you already know it won't apply to Japanese companies.

Yes , they have a weird tendency to mix the two, on the opposite. “Entertainment accounts” and so on... not my cup of tea

 

[TAG Manager]

Can't be seen doing it, but I know there are a few guys who do some off-color stuff but it's extremely hush-hush in most offices, large or small.

 

[Durg50]

Hostess clubs wouldnt even raise an eyebrow in a lot of japanese companies.

As for the harder stuff ie places that explicitly provide sexual services; i guess it depends in the company.

 

[inaka]

I do think it is none of these peoples business but there are those that consider it to be. My neighbors have not changed in the years I have lived in my current place, except for new babies and a few elderly that have passed. I am the only foreigner in my residential neighborhood, I am sure they have created a rumor mill just for me. I live in the countryside. I have been playing about 90 min away, and want to find something good but closer. I stumbled into this search engine which is how I found this nearer pinsaro. http://u-10000.com/ . Of course I would go alone. However it appears to be across from a major super market. Maybe 30 min from walking out my door to walking in theirs. I am invited to teach in a school as a "guest teacher" 4 times a year, not far from their. This pisaro is only open after 5PM iirc.

 

[Simonka]

Once my old Japanese manager forced me to stay after office hours.. only to complain about various stuff (I wasn’t even the target of those complaints, it was just random office gossip)

Before I managed to escape he called me to his desk only to show me some Facebook pictures of Japanese hostesses that he used to hang out with. He boasted about his old glorious days when he could splurge on hostess clubs. Then he closed his eyes, took a deep breath and murmured “mmmh the ladies smelled so good”. At this point the 23 year old doe-eyed semi virgin me thought I was going to get raped by a Sukebe oji-san, I clutched my belongings and quickly left.

We had to keep up with his shenanigans for a little longer because the big boss was a vegetable with no interest whatsoever in the office environment or the well being of his employees. Finally he got the boot about six months after this incident.

 

[Frenchy]

Once my old Japanese manager forced me to stay after office hours.. only to complain about various stuff (I wasn’t even the target of those complaints, it was just random office gossip)

Before I managed to escape he called me to his desk only to show me some Facebook pictures of Japanese hostesses that he used to hang out with. He boasted about his old glorious days when he could splurge on hostess clubs. Then he closed his eyes, took a deep breath and murmured “mmmh the ladies smelled so good”. At this point the 23 year old doe-eyed semi virgin me thought I was going to get raped by a Sukebe oji-san, I clutched my belongings and quickly left.

We had to keep up with his shenanigans for a little longer because the big boss was a vegetable with no interest whatsoever in the office environment or the well being of his employees. Finally he got the boot about six months after this incident.

... as he deserved!
Nobody can force you to stay after hours anyway... i know its Japan and social pressure bla bla bla but times have changed. If anything now, especially after the Dentsu karoshi suicide , we force our staff to NOT stay after hours

 

[Simonka]

... as he deserved!
Nobody can force you to stay after hours anyway... i know its Japan and social pressure bla bla bla but times have changed. If anything now, especially after the Dentsu karoshi suicide , we force our staff to NOT stay after hours

Mind you I was very young, inexperienced etc etc. now if the same thing ever happened to me not only i would show the middle finger but give them a glimpse of what could be done legally under such circumstances..

 

[SatoKM]

Back in 2009 I used to work, well actually it was more like an internship in a consulting company in Gotanda area. I was new at "Fuzoku" but I kind of knew what was going on in many stores around Gotanda Station.
Some of my coworkers "indirectly" encouraged me to visit some places in Ikebukuro and Shibuya, as they knew that I was single.
Hostess bars seems to be aceptable, as my boss used to openly invite me and others colleagues to those places.
When I started to use "Fuzoku" services while living in Tokyo, I went to places located in Yokohama so the chances of see someone from work was close to zero. Few times I met by chance at the same train with some workmates that lived in Kanagawa and if they asked me where I was going I replied: "to visit my cousins in...."

 

[Frenchy]

Back in 2009 I used to work, well actually it was more like an internship in a consulting company in Gotanda area. I was new at "Fuzoku" but I kind of knew what was going on in many stores around Gotanda Station.
Some of my coworkers "indirectly" encouraged me to visit some places in Ikebukuro and Shibuya, as they knew that I was single.
Hostess bars seems to be aceptable, as my boss used to openly invite me and others colleagues to those places.
When I started to use "Fuzoku" services while living in Tokyo, I went to places located in Yokohama so the chances of see someone from work was close to zero. Few times I met by chance at the same train with some workmates that lived in Kanagawa and if they asked me where I was going I replied: "to visit my cousins in...."

And how were the cousins then? gaijin-friendly? FS included?

 

[e-smile]

Outside of close friends, do you feel cautious or secretive about other Japanese people knowing you dip into pink salons, soaplands, etc? If a Japanese coworker saw you coming out of an establishment could that become a problem for you with your job? (and does it depend on the job?)

I have heard of after work spilling over into "snacks" and hostess clubs, but is that the limit?

I just realized there is a pinsaro not far from a school I work at (just) 4 times a year, and it got me thinking about this.

a friend of mine went once in his life to yoshiwara and he met a coworker he doesn't like in the waiting room
both are married

 

[SatoKM]

And how were the cousins then? gaijin-friendly? FS included?

LOL! Actually I was more worried about giving information about locations that were out of the train's route.

I guess sometimes my coworkers were naive or just pretend to be dumb. As I am such a bad liar!

 

[scorpioni6ths]

neighbors i really don't care

some friends know they can ask me if they want info about HE massages ... some "friends" are ex-DH girls ... one friend knows i've used escorts

coworkers don't know my hobby ... i work witn a pretty old school J company (most people have families, with one or both of them working in the same company) and try to be a goody goody. most of my friendships in the office are typical ... try to go w/ them during nomikais but nothing other than that. the people in the office are too uptight sometimes they don't even say hi/hello if you see them outside the office but they're probably rumor mills.

in the office .. i put on a pair of glasses and for a few minutes nobody recognizes me.

i don't mind being spotted in LH alleys ... but being seen coming out of establishments can be problematic.

 

[joeking]

If you are teaching, I'd say you need to be a lot more careful. Company might ignore it if it were he said/he said, but for a school, depending on the other person saying it, you might find your work drying up really fast.

 

[inaka]

Thanks. I have come to the conclusion that I have been naive (stupid) for considering a pisaro so close. Maybe the 90 min to Kyoto is a comfortable distance. There seems to be too many ways it could go wrong. I had thought, "well, it's legal so what could happen?" . Yes! Naive.

 

[MossBoss]

A company tied to the company I work for had a company trip to an onsen resort. Some of the guys ordered a couple of ‘middle-aged escorts’- the only ones available in the area.

The brave souls took turns while respecting the company hierarchy in which order they went. Although some of the guys bailed because of the lack of attractiveness of the ladies.

The upshot was that the news spread to the far-corners about the guys and their escort with a mustache.

 

[JohnnyWalker]

As an HR person I can comment.

Most companies have a moral behaviour clause in their rules of employment, and being caught coming out of a fuzoku establishment would be a clear violation of such.

Of course, for any discipline to take place, it would also have to be proven, so if your colleague didn’t take a photo it would be your word against his/hers.

It would further only be a serious offence if you were identifiable as an employee, wearing a uniform or a company pin, for example.

I was lost and stepping inside to get directions. Everyone was so nice there.

 

[SatoKM]

A company tied to the company I work for had a company trip to an onsen resort. Some of the guys ordered a couple of ‘middle-aged escorts’- the only ones available in the area.

The brave souls took turns while respecting the company hierarchy in which order they went. Although some of the guys bailed because of the lack of attractiveness of the ladies.

The upshot was that the news spread to the far-corners about the guys and their escort with a mustache.

Uuughhh! Disgusting and nasty!

 

[warubuta]

Remember Ross Perot? He was a billionaire magnate back in the early days of computing. He ran for US President but lost. Think it was in the 90s. I can’t remember. Anyway, I saw an interview where a young reporter, trying to tease out Perots Christian conservative social values, asked him what he would do if he found that a trusted married employee was having an affair. Perot said, without hesitation, that he would fire him on the spot. The reporter said that maybe Perot is a bit old fashioned and that the country has changed. Perot said it had nothing to do with anything other than trust. If a guys own wife can’t trust him, why should Perot trust him? A great answer. And this is why I never, never enjoy P4P with work associates. Nobody can really trust anybody. But if you work with someone in a company, you should at least maintain the facade that you can be trusted by your wife. If you are not married, it is a bit different, but you shouldn’t put yourself in a situation where you are aware of married guys cheating on their wives. You may say that it is different in Japan. It isn’t. Every successful senior exec I know has a rule to never do P4P with colleagues. Sure all of the second rate guys do, but the real winners do not.

 

[MikeH]

Sure all of the second rate guys do, but the real winners do not.

Then again I know no foreigner who would like to be a real winner when we are playing by the Japanese company rules.