Pua For Busy People

[hkAlone]

My first post in this section.

Basically, I'm way too committed and busy to have actual dates. I have quite a lot of business trips this and there, staying usually one or two nights in some of the Asian megapoles.
Except from p4p, I have quite a lot of opportunities to meet interesting women on my way. If I feel some mutual attraction, I am usually not really shy and manage my way to "kino" escalation and hot conversations.
My only issue is that most of the time, i end up with their phone number, which I will never call anyway as I'm going to fly back the very next day.
Basically, I usually enjoy the whole process, even if the end tend to be a bit frustrating.
In any case, I would feel horrible to have a dinner date knowing I'm committed.
I'm much more relax to chat in a bar, let it go and enjoy the ride.
I would just appreciate getting your recommendations to increase my probability to settle the same night...
In other words, in my world getting a phone number is considered as a failure

 

[Wwanderer]

In such a situation, why not just tell the woman (who is giving you her number) that you are flying out the next day (or whatever) and would love to spend the night with her having some fun before you go? In other words, why not just go ahead and proposition her with an explanation of why your availability is very limited.

In my experience, talking to women in a polite and respectful but adult way works just fine (at least for the sort of women with whom I enjoy spending time.) Aside from working pretty well, it is simple, easy and saves both people from a lot of uncertainty, frustration and disappointment. They may be a bit startled that you are not working/gaming them, but for many/most, it is a pleasant surprise.

-Ww

 

[Wwanderer]

And btw, why not save the phone number for your next visit and tell her when that will be, at least roughly, if you know? I used to do that routinely back in my road warrior days.

-Ww

 

[hkAlone]

In such a situation, why not just tell the woman (who is giving you her number) that you are flying out the next day (or whatever) and would love to spend the night with her having some fun before you go? In other words, why not just go ahead and proposition her with an explanation of why your availability is very limited.

In my experience, talking to women in a polite and respectful but adult way works just fine (at least for the sort of women with whom I enjoy spending time.) Aside from working pretty well, it is simple, easy and saves both people from a lot of uncertainty, frustration and disappointment. They may be a bit startled that you are not working/gaming them, but for many/most, it is a pleasant surprise.

-Ww

I guess I'm enjoying too often the conversation and the physical contact... and I'm forgetting the final goal. I naturally tend to take their
hands, wrapping their waist, having long eyes contact, making out... I was wondering if my style was may be too romantic. I tend to be quite ok at creating a comfortable atmosphere but I guess I'm not decided enough to settle quickly or my "target" is more willing of longer term relationship or had enough fun and social time for the day. It's not falling in the friend zone but more in the boyfriend zone.
When I finally propose to come to my room after making out for an hour, most of the time, I am getting a no.
You're right on one point... I'm not emphasizing enough my limited availability.

I'm a bit fed up actually about this boyfriend thing. I once ended up on some stupid conversation with a girl I met on adult friend finder. After some hot conversation online, we ended up masturbating in front of our webcams. I met her fit real a few hours later. we went straight to a LH and f.cked for like two hours.
At the end, she complained that I was not a serious guy, as I was having such kind of affairs even if I already have a girlfriend. She was a bit aggressive telling me that i should not do such kind of things... And finally she cried telling me she wants a boyfriend like me but doesn't want to get hurt. I was bewildered...
I never replied to any of her texts or calls later...

 

[hkAlone]

And btw, why not save the phone number for your next visit and tell her when that will be, at least roughly, if you know? I used to do that routinely back in my road warrior days.

-Ww

Usually I'm losing the motivation to call back after a few months. It feels weird to me to call back someone after two months.

 

[Wwanderer]

It's not falling in the friend zone but more in the boyfriend zone.
When I finally propose to come to my room after making out for an hour, most of the time, I am getting a no.

Where is it that you are making out if not in your room or some other suitable private place? I am picturing you DFKing and fondling each other in them middle of some posh restaurant or bar or hotel lobby or other public place, but surely that isn't it. Anyway, I'm not getting the picture here.

You're right on one point... I'm not emphasizing enough my limited availability.

If it were me, I'd mention my limited availability (both in the short and long run) fairly early in the interaction, pretty much as soon as it is apparent that she is interested. This would probably prevent her from starting to think of you as a potential bf and, more importantly, would avoid misleading her a bit by omission. You would perhaps lose the interest of many of these women much earlier in the evening, but on the other hand, those who proceeded with you would know the score/situation and be much more likely to be looking for the same outcome you are.

To be more clear, I wouldn't always do that. I don't always do the same thing; it depends on my mood, current situation, level of attraction, impression of the woman, intuition of the moment etc...just play it by ear and impulse. Imo, it is boring at best to have a system or always do down the same roads. However, in general, I lean toward putting all my cards on the table and being extremely clear, direct and honest...fwiiw. I definitely do not claim that I maximize the number of times I end up having sex, but then that is not my goal.

-Ww

 

[Wwanderer]

Usually I'm losing the motivation to call back after a few months. It feels weird to me to call back someone after two months.

Maybe keep in touch a bit while you're not there...email occasionally or whatever? Just a thought/possibility.

-Ww

 

[hkAlone]

Where is it that you are making out if not in your room or some other suitable private place? I am picturing you DFKing and fondling each other in them middle of some posh restaurant or bar or hotel lobby or other public place, but surely that isn't it. Anyway, I'm not getting the picture here.



If it were me, I'd mention my limited availability (both in the short and long run) fairly early in the interaction, pretty much as soon as it is apparent that she is interested. This would probably prevent her from starting to think of you as a potential bf and, more importantly, would avoid misleading her a bit by omission. You would perhaps lose the interest of many of these women much earlier in the evening, but on the other hand, those who proceeded with you would know the score/situation and be much more likely to be looking for the same outcome you are.

To be more clear, I wouldn't always do that. I don't always do the same thing; it depends on my mood, current situation, level of attraction, impression of the woman, intuition of the moment etc...just play it by ear and impulse. Imo, it is boring at best to have a system or always do down the same roads. However, in general, I lean toward putting all my cards on the table and being extremely clear, direct and honest...fwiiw. I definitely do not claim that I maximize the number of times I end up having sex, but then that is not my goal.

-Ww

Haha... I may be forgot to mention my French origins. I have no particular issues to make out usually in a bar after midnight, on the street, in a cab or in hotel lobbies.
I hope it helps picturising it...
On a side note, it's funny to mention how much Japanese ladies are into public mark of affection out of Japan (particularly in Paris).
To come back to the topic, i never lie but I won't insist on my marital status neither.
The topic can arise once in a while with single ladies. I tend actually to be more physical in such moments and reply elusively to the question.

 

[hkAlone]

More generally, in my experience same night lays are unusual.
I am not starving for it, but for a guy who is going out on business trip 60 nights a year, I may count one or two snl in average per year.
After discussing with my junior staff, I realized that even if these guys were going out basically three times per week, are considered locally as rich expats in a city full of material girls, they basically very rarely experience SNLs.
I was very disappointed after reading the Game that most of the thing was about getting phone numbers, having a date and then settling.
I thought that the art was the ability to create the right atmosphere of comfort to have sex the same night...
Imo, such moments are the results of a strong chemistry where desires and trust are built instantaneously. I just feel they are to rare...