Approaching a Japanese woman in public

[yeti]

Losing weight is just good in general. There are no upsides to being fat, it's all shit. When my friend from Hokkaido visited at the end of November and said that I got leaner, it made me feel incredible. Once I am back home, I'm hitting the gym to get muscle too. It's just a net positive.

Amen

 

[yeti]

Et tù, Brute?

I have never really been in amazing shape my whole life and have had a decent string of girlfriends.

Granted, access to SOME girls denied because of the belly, but I would still argue just having a way with words and being interesting always goes farther than any physical appearance.

Considering the vanity in this country l, though, as a good start I jog every evening so that I can continue positive weight loss through this year as well.

....perhaps being chubby wouldve saved ceasar from that stabbing, I knew a fat guy who survived a mugging and stabbing in Miami because of his rotund physique.

anyways... you'll get no arguments from me when it comes to the power of conversation

that being said, you are severely handicapping yourself if all 3 scenarios are present.

,,,I point out "fat" simply for the momentum killer, when that shirt finally comes off.

 

[Cinnabums]

Weight! For the few here who has seen me IRL, I was close to 60kgs some 10 years ago, not a beautiful sight. Definitely looks better a bit overweight.

 

[Barabbas]

The best line... is not a line but a point. hahaha Im just messing with you but I do got a point as in - you make a point about something that is contextual to a situation.

bla bla da neee wink wink jk aside - I hear its a good tip to ask her for a favor first like "can you pass me the xy" or whatever the fuck is situationally adequate. When she does that you can open with something.


"I like your shirt" when it comes from nowhere sounds a bit less suave than "do you know the time, my sumaho died.." time is now or never sailor "Oh bdw nice shirt, I like flower patterns".

From my experience and if anything I have experience approaching girls.

Have a nice smile, look your best, establish a safe atmosphere, be casual and relaxed and fun. The mental state you are in speaks louder than your words.
Id first try to establish a rapport via body language, like, be in observable distance from the girl, try to see if she's looking, exchange few looks or smiles if possible. Maybe even a wink if you feel dandy.

Then approach and comment on something about her that captured your attention. And be genuinely interested in her day, what is she doing, but not in FBI type of way, but more like rub the lamp until the spirit comes out by itself. Kinda nudge conversation into being.
Keep things fun and light. You could ask her for a coffee then and there, its not impossible. Even if there is more of them. Think in terms of making friends.

My rule of thumb is - the goal is not the number, or the kiss, or the hug. The goal is to GET TO KNOW the person. Dont forget the forest for sake of trees. See the big picture. You want an LTR so you do want to become intimate, intimacy is getting to know the person. This is not seduction in terms of "best lines" or "what to say to get her to do xyz". Its being socially adept while rising levels of intimacy.

So be interested into her, in a respectuful non intrusive way, be fun and show her you are a man after all in some comfortable way, more and more as time goes - if she is responding well, if not, then get back to establishing more rapport. But the point is - if you really want LTR - you will know which girl vibes with you and which one doesnt.

Another rule - if it feels like you are fighting a one man battle, usually its time to back off. A girl who is feeling you will be on your side very quickly and help you even if you fumble, to get to know her better.

Also dont ever get butt hurt over anything, just water of ducks back. Respect yourself but dont be emotional and childish.

Women sometimes are just surprised by being approached, or inexperienced or lack confidence, and sometimes they lose the opportunity because they may appear cold but they are just shy and surprised.
You cannot be her clown and do everything but dont always assume worse just because she seems lagging in a way. An exchanged contact and "what u up to?" here and there can lead to something over time.

And biggest fucking thing ever, talking especially to myself - first throw a wide net, then harpoon. Which means - arrange many dates, meet many women, think in terms of abundance build abundance mindset in yourself and then when one bites properly you can let others go. Dont make the error of finding a quirky girl u like and then becoming all over her and giving her too many chances to learn you lost all self respect since u met her.

I used to feel it was immoral from me to approach girls while I was "working the girl I liked into being mine" but I lost a lot of opportunities that way and only acted too desperate.

Just keep your options plenty, they do it too. And its a bigger compliment to choose one from many you have prospects with, than one because thats the only one.

 

[MrDuBois]

lost all self respect

I do not know what this is!

 

[Barabbas]

Thankfully Im forgetting it as well.

 

[Barabbas]

Bdw guys where in Tokyo is a good place to meet girls in the good ole' way?

Whats the verdict - bars or clubs what is better? Im down for whatever, one night stand preferred tho since I wont be in the city for long time.
Any other tips?

Im still dealing with the big culture shock that gay stuff from my country is macho stuff in Japan, what else is new?

 

[Combat]

Bdw guys where in Tokyo is a good place to meet girls in the good ole' way?

Whats the verdict - bars or clubs what is better? Im down for whatever, one night stand preferred tho since I wont be in the city for long time.
Any other tips?

Im still dealing with the big culture shock that gay stuff from my country is macho stuff in Japan, what else is new?

This answer is not popular on these forums, but honestly? The street.

 

[Barabbas]

Opening lines literally don't matter, it's all about how

This answer is not popular on these forums, but honestly? The street.

I have experience cold approaching, a lot. So I like this answer. Any tips for Japan?

Any examples, experiences you had? Do girls in Japan appreciate ballsy guys?

 

[Combat]

I have experience cold approaching, a lot. So I like this answer. Any tips for Japan?

Any examples, experiences you had? Do girls in Japan appreciate ballsy guys?

Street nanpa is a huge thing in Japan, there are dudes (including gaijin) getting laid every day in Tokyo via street approach. I have SNL'd a couple times from street.

@Sinapse's content is a good starting point.

 

[Barabbas]

Street nanpa is a huge thing in Japan, there are dudes (including gaijin) getting laid every day in Tokyo via street approach. I have SNL'd a couple times from street.

@Sinapse's content is a good starting point.

Man every day I find out something new about Japan that I like.

Sounds like my type of thing. Pick up your balls and go for it type of thing.