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  1. bergmann

    Solo vs Intercourse

    Don't worry, the same thing happens to everyone.
  2. bergmann

    Pandemic reaches Kabukicho

    Oooh, there's one with a megaphone too: https://headlines.yahoo.co.jp/hl?a=20200410-00000040-jijp-soci.view-000
  3. bergmann

    Pandemic reaches Kabukicho

    Well, here you go - another bergmann prediction coming true. A bit younger than I was imagining but close enough: (source)
  4. bergmann

    Pandemic reaches Kabukicho

    Is that the family restaurant Jonathan's or the happy ending Jonathan's?
  5. bergmann

    Pandemic reaches Kabukicho

    Not quite Kabukicho but the square next to Takadanobaba station where students tend to congregate in large numbers, particularly at this time of the year (and which has been shown on TV as an example of how the youth of today are Not Getting The Message) was being patrolled by a couple of...
  6. bergmann

    Pandemic reaches Kabukicho

    Well I TOFTT and cut through Kabukicho on the way back because YOLO and all that and fuck me it was dead, reminded me of the week after 3/11 but with more lights and less background radiation.
  7. bergmann

    Pandemic reaches Kabukicho

    Westbound Chuo Line at Kanda just before 6pm Thursday evening: had seats available. Stayed remarkably uncrowded to Kichijoji, where I got off. Estimated 97% of passengers wearing masks. Windows open. Unless you're going round licking the grab straps, need to be damned unlucky to pick up a spray...
  8. bergmann

    Pandemic reaches Kabukicho

    No shutdowns, the Japanese Way will be to reassign large numbers of sprightly ojisans from the Bicycle Parking Enforcement Teams and the Please Do Not Smoke on the Street Teams and the Municipal Illuminated Baton Waving and Whistle Blowing Reservist Pool to flood the area (between 10am and 6pm)...
  9. bergmann

    Killing Kittens

    Try the local 保健所, they might have some no-one will take off their hands :(.
  10. bergmann

    Good Adult Jokes

    Some people would pay for that experience.
  11. bergmann

    How to get my blowjob here?!

    What you probably saw is actually 力・フェラ・テ, "力" being chikara (easy to confuse with katakana カ) and テ being slang for "手" (hand, as in テコキ), so what's on offer is most likely what can only be described as a "powerful hand-assisted blow job", I'll spare you the details but it will make a 20 minute...
  12. bergmann

    So I decided to marry my new Sugar Babe

    I self-identify as a trans wombat on my days off, if that helps. Though if Mikey is a priest of one of those religions which likes sacrificing small animals, I might pass.
  13. bergmann

    So I decided to marry my new Sugar Babe

    Any vacancies for bridesmaids?
  14. bergmann

    Starting amateur porn company looking for male actors

    It's an equal opportunity law - actual sexual genital bits from either gender are not allowed. Heaven forbid that Japanese youth grows up with the idea that the naughty parts aren't actually pixelized in real life. Still, Japan is liberalizing, it was as recent as the 1990s that the depiction of...
  15. bergmann

    Hooters

    The Akasaka branch is pretty busy on weekday lunchtimes, or at least was when I worked in the area a few years ago. It wasn't particularly great for actual hooters, mind you this is Japan.
  16. bergmann

    Hooters

    Going tits-up?
  17. bergmann

    Porn story lines

    Three minutes? Is that with or without the closing credits?
  18. bergmann

    Some requests for porn producers

    I might be a bit weird with this, but here are some things I'd rather not see: ob/gyn close-ups of the girl's naught bits - a nice shot of a welcoming wet slit is fine, but a screen-filling close-up of the urethra fails to be sexy for some reason shots of the guy's bits from behind/underneath...
  19. bergmann

    Porn story lines

    Wait, porn has storylines??! You'll be telling me there's dialog next.
  20. bergmann

    What sexual service do you miss in Japan?

    Not something I've ever felt I've missed out on. What I do miss is the opportunity for a decent massage where you can bonk the masseuse for a little extra.