Differences between "GFE" and actual interest?

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caseykei

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Sorry if this is a very naive question, but I'm still quite new to P4P.

I started seeing a provider a couple of months ago. First time I saw her at her shop, she gave me a lot of free options (hugging, kissing, fingering) and just seemed really into it. I assumed it was just good GFE service. Went there a few more times to see her, same type of GFE.

Last month, she told me she was quitting the shop and going to another higher paying shop. She told me the name of the new shop and I recently saw her again at the new place. The new place is much more expensive, so I'm hoping to eventually do some kind of arrangement where I can meet her privately and pay her directly without the middleman (or some kind of discount.

Obviously, this is a bad idea. But I figured that if she is really into me, I could try to get her contact information or something.

Are there any obvious signs to tell the difference between a provider with GFE or is actually interested? I assume that most providers are quite talented with their "acting," so I probably won't be able to tell. But if it makes any difference, she is still fairly new to fuzoku, having started those two months ago, working a couple times a week.
 
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caseykei said:
Obviously, this is a bad idea
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I dont think its a bad idea to ask to meet her outside of the shop. If she gets upset and tells the shop, they may blacklist you, but since its pricier than you want to pay, that doesn't sound like a very bad thing.

Yes, worst case you might not be able to see her at all anymore, but how is she benefitting from losing a customer? If you ask politely, even if she refuses to meet you outside of the shop, she probably wont make a fuzz of it and you can still see her in the shop if you want.


As for her behavior, if she is new, maybe she likes the job or just wants to make good regulars? She may also like you as a customer, its hard to tell. But its probably no romantic interest.
 
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Well, did you get her contact info like Line or something? If you didn't then she certainly likes you as a customer.

And normally if you need to specifically ask then the answer is no.
 
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I always assume it's just good acting until someone gives me some (non-sex) reason to assume otherwise. However I also appreciate good acting, so anything's fine really. I'm not looking for a girlfriend.

A girl doesn't have to actually like you to meet you outside work either, maybe she just thinks you're nicer/more reliable than the shop punters. Doesn't hurt to ask I guess, although I never do myself. I like having that middleman in between us, it keeps things simpler.
 
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Everything Alice said, and...

As others mentioned, the fact that she gave you extras and took you to a new shop doesn’t mean she likes you. However, she’s breaking the shops’ rules. Thus, you two are now in a conspiracy together. You don’t have to worry about inquiring about her contact information to plan a date. Worst case, she’ll tell you the same thing she told the last 10-100 guys that asked.
 
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MikeH said:
And normally if you need to specifically ask then the answer is no.
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Is it possible that most girls who are asking clients for contact information are doing so to hang onto a client? Either by meeting outside the shop for ¥ or calling him into the shop/arranging appointments? On the other hand, might girls that give their contact when asked (but don’t offer unprompted) be more likely to be open to a more normal relationship?

Providers probably are good at suppressing any feelings and viewing all customers relatively equally as “customers”, unless by some action or circumstance the customer moves out of that category. If the provider takes that action herself, she’ll be risking that the customer will always see her as “just a p4p provider”. In other words, she won’t have any evidence of his feelings through his own actions.
 
jelle said:
Is it possible that most girls who are asking clients for contact information are doing so to hang onto a client? Either by meeting outside the shop for ¥ or calling him into the shop/arranging appointments? On the other hand, might girls that give their contact when asked (but don’t offer unprompted) be more likely to be open to a more normal relationship?

Providers probably are good at suppressing any feelings and viewing all customers relatively equally as “customers”, unless by some action or circumstance the customer moves out of that category. If the provider takes that action herself, she’ll be risking that the customer will always see her as “just a p4p provider”. In other words, she won’t have any evidence of his feelings through his own actions.
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Well, from what i heard a lot of shops encourage the girls to exchange contacts and to get the guy to come back, sometimes they even let the girls make direct bookings with the guy.

I also think that for girls who want to move to another shop, its a good way to keep customers they personally like and dont want to lose.

But yeah, a shop is not a dating site. Someone can sincerely like her clients but not want a relationship with them.
 
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User#8628 said:
But yeah, a shop is not a dating site. Someone can sincerely like her clients but not want a relationship with them.
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Exactly this. Of course it works the opposite direction too; someone can really like a girl and want to keep it strictly a client relationship.
 
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MikeH said:
Exactly this. Of course it works the opposite direction too; someone can really like a girl and want to keep it strictly a client relationship.
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I second that. And perhaps you really like two, or three, or different people for different reasons.

Remember also that "liking someone" isn't an exclusive or specifically-defined thing. It includes an entire spectrum of feelings and needs, from the shallow to the practical and to the complicated. All friendships & relationships are on this spectrum of course, the main difference here is that it involves sex at every point on the spectrum.
 
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The difference is quite simple in my dumb frenchy’s opinion : in one case you pay, in the other case you don’t
 
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