Private Meeting Question

[fort3cred31]

No, the age portion of my reply was not directed to Homer at all, it was clearly directed to OP:



I don't care how old Homer or his anecdotal example are. I am talking about the OP here who created this thread - I want to know his age relative to the girl he started the thread about. Don't confuse that with the part of my reply saying that Homer need not educate a SW on Japanese social norms around cheating. Those are two different topics, clearly parsed out separately in my reply in post #20. Perhaps scroll up and read it again.

Haven’t opened the site and was surprised to see so much discussion haha. Thank you all!

I figured I’d drop this maybe important piece of information but the reason we exchanged LINE was because she said she would most likely quit after this last college semester ends (I don’t live in Osaka by the way). She’s super nice, professional, and even though you’re not supposed ask for something personal, I felt that it wouldn’t be a bad idea based off of our interaction. Worst case she’d say it’s not allowed and I just move on.

In response to this particular comment I’m mid 20s and she’s in her last year of college like I said, looks barely 20 in my opinion. The conversation between us still continues, just small talk. But we set on a place day and time for dinner I guess? I tried to ask this in the nicest way possible without coming across as rude, but long story short I asked about how things go, what’s it like when she meets privately, and $$. She didn’t really mention dos and don’ts but what she did mention was that she’d really appreciate a tip and that she does not care about the amount. I was going into this thinking I should/have to so no problem there. She also mentioned she privately meets with a few people occasionally but who knows what a few means these days haha.

That’s about it! I’ll keep on updating as long as the thread is still alive. T-Minus 3 weeks for now.

 

[WagyuManko]

Haven’t opened the site and was surprised to see so much discussion haha. Thank you all!

I figured I’d drop this maybe important piece of information but the reason we exchanged LINE was because she said she would most likely quit after this last college semester ends (I don’t live in Osaka by the way). She’s super nice, professional, and even though you’re not supposed ask for something personal, I felt that it wouldn’t be a bad idea based off of our interaction. Worst case she’d say it’s not allowed and I just move on.

In response to this particular comment I’m mid 20s and she’s in her last year of college like I said, looks barely 20 in my opinion. The conversation between us still continues, just small talk. But we set on a place day and time for dinner I guess? I tried to ask this in the nicest way possible without coming across as rude, but long story short I asked about how things go, what’s it like when she meets privately, and $$. She didn’t really mention dos and don’ts but what she did mention was that she’d really appreciate a tip and that she does not care about the amount. I was going into this thinking I should/have to so no problem there. She also mentioned she privately meets with a few people occasionally but who knows what a few means these days haha.

That’s about it! I’ll keep on updating as long as the thread is still alive. T-Minus 3 weeks for now.

Sounds like you have the right approach/attitude.

I mean fuck it, take her out and have fun and roll with it, even if you have to pay. How many guys can say they got to take a Tobita girl out, or any SW? Even if she's still expecting to be paid, she clearly has some preference for you (and your money) over the majority of the other John Q. Mongers, so may as well appreciate it and roll with it. Then again if she's really quitting soon, then who knows, maybe she really is trying to feel you out as a potential boyfriend. I'd be excited as hell to take her out to dinner, shit like this is what makes life worth living.

Take it from a guy who is 40 - I had a lot of fun in Japan when I was living there in my mid-20s, I regret absolutely nothing. Say yes to everything, keep an open mind, and have as much fun as possible. Will it be a bust? Who knows, who cares - it's only money, you can make more money everyday but you won't have Tobita girls handing out their personal contact info when you're my age (unless they are down off nenkin street, lol). And I would have zero, and I mean zero hangups about dating an ex-SW, or even a current one; the older I get the more comfortable I get and the less I care about stuff like pedigree and provenance or what other people think.

Have fun, keep it light, don't have any expectations, and do keep us updated - I'm legit excited for you.

 

[Kevt]

She didn’t really mention dos and don’ts but what she did mention was that she’d really appreciate a tip and that she does not care about the amount. I was going into this thinking I should/have to so no problem there. She also mentioned she privately meets with a few people occasionally but who knows what a few means these days haha.

Sounds great if you two get along. She might be trying to transition into an inexperienced (maybe) SB if she isn't setting firm requirements.

Here are some tidbits that might help. Keep these with a grain of salt since its just my own personal experiences.... Since you two are nearly the same age, she might actually be looking for more along the lines of a boyfriend.

I'd steer clear of referring to anything as payment for sex... and just say any money is "support", "pocket money", or "gifts". Then it's not prostitution...

IHMO.. if you want to keep her, then go with typical rates of support for Japan... The costs really are not much different than paying for fuzoku... I personally switch almost all fuzoku costs to SBs which has it's positives and negatives.

Going rates for SBs in Japan range from 3-5万 on a pay per meet. College girls get more from what I read on a SB blog. The lowest I pay is 2万 for girls that purely meet just for quickies and that i wouldn't be heartbroken when they moved on. From what I understand, a Papa trying to stop or decrease payments is fairly common in their world... and probably would drop in priority.. Also the "support" is separate to the costs of any dates or gifts.... SBs depend on their Papas and its not just the fancy dates. Lowest limits of support can go down to free... but would be very dependant on your SB's needs.

Highest limits of support are in the realm of rumors and myths.... but keep in mind that you'd be competing for attention with possibly some wealthy Papas.

Some SBs are active SWs in established fuzoku also... and imho these expect higher support.... although I get a sense that SBs that are retired SWs can be more reasonable and are Less apt to buy into the fantasy of massive amounts of money.

For my BAE SB.... she understands that I have a limit on disposable income. She doesn't normally dip into fuzoku but has told me when she does temporarily. She has rejected support a fair amount of times (I always offer) by her own discretion. If funds are tight, then she has ok with not going out to fancy places. She will tell me when she expects her periods to see if I'd like to postpone. We have real life info of each other and have met each others friends. Plans to meet family gets discussed but hasnt happened. She and my wife havent met but know a fair amount about each other. My wife refers to her as my girlfriend. It's really all open communication.

It is harder to just run out and get laid since they have full time schedules, so I do still go to typical fuzoku on rare occasions.

Warning... be ready for potential heartbreak... due to the direct real-life personal interactions, there could be a lot of emotional attachments... sugar dating is really a lot of trust and is very much like real dating.... and my wife gets waaay more money from me than I'd ever give a SB.

 

[maikeru]

No, the age portion of my reply was not directed to Homer at all, it was clearly directed to OP:



I don't care how old Homer or his anecdotal example are. I am talking about the OP here who created this thread - I want to know his age relative to the girl he started the thread about. Don't confuse that with the part of my reply saying that Homer need not educate a SW on Japanese social norms around cheating. Those are two different topics, clearly parsed out separately in my reply in post #20. Perhaps scroll up and read it again.

Noted, that's right

 

[Maxblack]

Be a gentleman; pay for everything and at the end of the evening give her 2-3 man for “taxi and expenses”. Don’t make a big deal about it and have fun!
If you end up marrying her you will still be shoveling money into her purse so don’t think it’s all that weird. 😆

 

[Kevt]

Slightly off topic.... I believe that my wife had a Papa in her college years, but I have no idea on details. It's really not important to me so no reason to ask. She is on good speaking terms with his wife and maybe current SB? He's been to our wedding and have met our families and kids. It feels more normal than it sounds.

My own SB and I have committed to being in each other's lives forever even after she eventually gets married.

 

[SpecialK]

Slightly off topic.... I believe that my wife had a Papa in her college years, but I have no idea on details. It's really not important to me so no reason to ask. She is on good speaking terms with his wife and maybe current SB? He's been to our wedding and have met our families and kids. It feels more normal than it sounds.

My own SB and I have committed to being in each other's lives forever even after she eventually gets married.

Wow, you have a very open and honest set of relationships there. Not many can pull that off, but happy for you.

 

[Maxblack]

Slightly off topic.... I believe that my wife had a Papa in her college years, but I have no idea on details. It's really not important to me so no reason to ask. She is on good speaking terms with his wife and maybe current SB? He's been to our wedding and have met our families and kids. It feels more normal than it sounds.

My own SB and I have committed to being in each other's lives forever even after she eventually gets married.

It does not sound even remotely normal but glad it’s working for you.

 

[fort3cred31]

Sounds great if you two get along. She might be trying to transition into an inexperienced (maybe) SB if she isn't setting firm requirements.

Here are some tidbits that might help. Keep these with a grain of salt since its just my own personal experiences.... Since you two are nearly the same age, she might actually be looking for more along the lines of a boyfriend.

I'd steer clear of referring to anything as payment for sex... and just say any money is "support", "pocket money", or "gifts". Then it's not prostitution...

IHMO.. if you want to keep her, then go with typical rates of support for Japan... The costs really are not much different than paying for fuzoku... I personally switch almost all fuzoku costs to SBs which has it's positives and negatives.

Going rates for SBs in Japan range from 3-5万 on a pay per meet. College girls get more from what I read on a SB blog. The lowest I pay is 2万 for girls that purely meet just for quickies and that i wouldn't be heartbroken when they moved on. From what I understand, a Papa trying to stop or decrease payments is fairly common in their world... and probably would drop in priority.. Also the "support" is separate to the costs of any dates or gifts.... SBs depend on their Papas and its not just the fancy dates. Lowest limits of support can go down to free... but would be very dependant on your SB's needs.

Highest limits of support are in the realm of rumors and myths.... but keep in mind that you'd be competing for attention with possibly some wealthy Papas.

Some SBs are active SWs in established fuzoku also... and imho these expect higher support.... although I get a sense that SBs that are retired SWs can be more reasonable and are Less apt to buy into the fantasy of massive amounts of money.

For my BAE SB.... she understands that I have a limit on disposable income. She doesn't normally dip into fuzoku but has told me when she does temporarily. She has rejected support a fair amount of times (I always offer) by her own discretion. If funds are tight, then she has ok with not going out to fancy places. She will tell me when she expects her periods to see if I'd like to postpone. We have real life info of each other and have met each others friends. Plans to meet family gets discussed but hasnt happened. She and my wife havent met but know a fair amount about each other. My wife refers to her as my girlfriend. It's really all open communication.

It is harder to just run out and get laid since they have full time schedules, so I do still go to typical fuzoku on rare occasions.

Warning... be ready for potential heartbreak... due to the direct real-life personal interactions, there could be a lot of emotional attachments... sugar dating is really a lot of trust and is very much like real dating.... and my wife gets waaay more money from me than I'd ever give a SB.

Thanks for the insight! As for $$ Idk how to feel about the “I don’t care about the amount” part. Is that just the Japanese indirect way of saying she doesn’t care but has a minimum amount in mind? Or does she really not care? Granted I’m not gonna pull up with a low amount lol. But then again everyone’s definition of “low” varies so…

 

[qcryp]

Thanks for the insight! As for $$ Idk how to feel about the “I don’t care about the amount” part. Is that just the Japanese indirect way of saying she doesn’t care but has a minimum amount in mind? Or does she really not care? Granted I’m not gonna pull up with a low amount lol. But then again everyone’s definition of “low” varies so…

If she doesn't give you a price it's just hard to say... But she told you she'd "really appreciate a tip" so she certainly expects some payment. I should not be giving advice because I don't have experience in this area, but what I would do is probably go on the date and see how things go and decide at the end how much to give her. I'd probably use the range that @Kevt mentioned.

It's sort of an awkward situation haha but good luck. Give a large amount and she'll expect that with future meets, give too small and she might write you off.

I don't think I could stop myself from just trying to be direct and establish what sort of relationship this is and what she is really looking for ha. This is why I suck at relationships though.

 

[Airnest]

Thanks for the insight! As for $$ Idk how to feel about the “I don’t care about the amount” part. Is that just the Japanese indirect way of saying she doesn’t care but has a minimum amount in mind? Or does she really not care? Granted I’m not gonna pull up with a low amount lol. But then again everyone’s definition of “low” varies so…

Think Tobita rates.

 

[Kevt]

Thanks for the insight! As for $$ Idk how to feel about the “I don’t care about the amount” part. Is that just the Japanese indirect way of saying she doesn’t care but has a minimum amount in mind? Or does she really not care? Granted I’m not gonna pull up with a low amount lol. But then again everyone’s definition of “low” varies so…

I'm guessing it's that Japanese indirect way of speaking. But you two are around usual dating age of each other... so could be that she would accept or want more than a typical sugardaddy relationship.

Think Tobita rates.

Probably not so simple but depends on her time availability. A P4P session is a finite time whereas a SB time is often not. If she spends several hours with you, then you don't want to spend several hours worth of Tobita time for instance.

I spend more than at a low end soap and less than a high end soap... but have spent anywhere between 2 hours and up 3 days for same support.

 

[Maxblack]

10,000 yen for taxi money. 10 minutes or 10 hours it doesn’t matter. Give her 10k.
“Adult” add 20,000 yen. Quickie HJ in the karaoke to all night passionate love making at the onsen, doesn’t matter. She touches your dick give her 20,000.
So typically meet with adult is 30,000.
Obviously pay for food and whatever else. Some shopping? Be reasonable but go with it and give her some guidelines;
“You need some basics to get though spring?” 10,000-20,000
“would love to buy you some new lingerie for you to model for me” 30,000 - 50,000.
“Get dressed up for dinner” 80,000.
“Let’s GO I’m getting you red-bottom’d shoes and bling bling” 100,000+ …

 

[Kevt]

10,000 yen for taxi money. 10 minutes or 10 hours it doesn’t matter. Give her 10k.
“Adult” add 20,000 yen. Quickie HJ in the karaoke to all night passionate love making at the onsen, doesn’t matter. She touches your dick give her 20,000.
So typically meet with adult is 30,000.
Obviously pay for food and whatever else. Some shopping? Be reasonable but go with it and give her some guidelines;
“You need some basics to get though spring?” 10,000-20,000
“would love to buy you some new lingerie for you to model for me” 30,000 - 50,000.
“Get dressed up for dinner” 80,000.
“Let’s GO I’m getting you red-bottom’d shoes and bling bling” 100,000+ …

LOL.. yeah.. my SB life is kind of like this. sometimes it's cost effective and sometimes it's not... pseudo dating.. still cheaper than a wife though..

Although sometimes it has also been free since my SB has refused support from time to time

 

[Katie Kinako]

10,000 yen for taxi money. 10 minutes or 10 hours it doesn’t matter. Give her 10k.
“Adult” add 20,000 yen. Quickie HJ in the karaoke to all night passionate love making at the onsen, doesn’t matter. She touches your dick give her 20,000.
So typically meet with adult is 30,000.
Obviously pay for food and whatever else. Some shopping? Be reasonable but go with it and give her some guidelines;
“You need some basics to get though spring?” 10,000-20,000
“would love to buy you some new lingerie for you to model for me” 30,000 - 50,000.
“Get dressed up for dinner” 80,000.
“Let’s GO I’m getting you red-bottom’d shoes and bling bling” 100,000+ …

If you’re getting a girl red bottoms, prepare to spend more than 100,000+ (unless you’re getting pre-loved pairs) on the shoes alone 😹

 

[SpecialK]

If you’re getting a girl red bottoms, prepare to spend more than 100,000+ (unless you’re getting pre-loved pairs) on the shoes alone 😹

I think he was talking about Nike Air Force One's with the red sole.

 

[fort3cred31]

Sounds like you have the right approach/attitude.

I mean fuck it, take her out and have fun and roll with it, even if you have to pay. How many guys can say they got to take a Tobita girl out, or any SW? Even if she's still expecting to be paid, she clearly has some preference for you (and your money) over the majority of the other John Q. Mongers, so may as well appreciate it and roll with it. Then again if she's really quitting soon, then who knows, maybe she really is trying to feel you out as a potential boyfriend. I'd be excited as hell to take her out to dinner, shit like this is what makes life worth living.

Take it from a guy who is 40 - I had a lot of fun in Japan when I was living there in my mid-20s, I regret absolutely nothing. Say yes to everything, keep an open mind, and have as much fun as possible. Will it be a bust? Who knows, who cares - it's only money, you can make more money everyday but you won't have Tobita girls handing out their personal contact info when you're my age (unless they are down off nenkin street, lol). And I would have zero, and I mean zero hangups about dating an ex-SW, or even a current one; the older I get the more comfortable I get and the less I care about stuff like pedigree and provenance or what other people think.

Have fun, keep it light, don't have any expectations, and do keep us updated - I'm legit excited for you.

Heck ya you’re absolutely right!

Update: we ended up going back into the conversation of dos and don’ts, and she mentioned that “fun time” is for the shop only. Sad, but not a problem. Just wondering what the motive could be as others had mentioned on the thread. Of course being in college money is surely a big factor.

 

[Kevt]

Heck ya you’re absolutely right!

Update: we ended up going back into the conversation of dos and don’ts, and she mentioned that “fun time” is for the shop only. Sad, but not a problem. Just wondering what the motive could be as others had mentioned on the thread. Of course being in college money is surely a big factor.

Didn't you say she was planning on leaving the shop? Then "fun time" for shop only doesn't make sense.

fyi- sugardating for meals only are usually low compensation.. ignore all the cost estimates from earlier. they could progress towards adult activities.. or not.. if she already has sugar daddies, then I'd expect she already has fun time outside of shop. proceed with caution and watch out for being milked (not in a good way)

 

[fort3cred31]

Didn't you say she was planning on leaving the shop? Then "fun time" for shop only doesn't make sense.

fyi- sugardating for meals only are usually low compensation.. ignore all the cost estimates from earlier. they could progress towards adult activities.. or not.. if she already has sugar daddies, then I'd expect she already has fun time outside of shop. proceed with caution and watch out for being milked (not in a good way)

Yup she did. But the time she mentioned was almost a year later. I just imagined I wouldn’t be back to Osaka for more than a year but my work is sending me there again to my surprise.

 

[WagyuManko]

Heck ya you’re absolutely right!

Update: we ended up going back into the conversation of dos and don’ts, and she mentioned that “fun time” is for the shop only. Sad, but not a problem. Just wondering what the motive could be as others had mentioned on the thread. Of course being in college money is surely a big factor.

That kinda sucks, but it helps manage expectations and will help keep things lighter on the date. Just go into it now with the mindset that you two will share a meal, have some drinks, and that you'll get to know her a bit - it'll be fun even without the adult activities.

Also @Kevt that is wild that you have a SB and your wife knows all about her and is cool with it. Definitely not normal. How did you manage to pull that off? Trying to imagine that initial conversation of either asking for or telling about...

 

[Maxblack]

If she just wants to hang as friends for a meal or whatever with low likelihood of “adult”; pay for the date and have fun.

 

[WagyuManko]

Yup she did. But the time she mentioned was almost a year later. I just imagined I wouldn’t be back to Osaka for more than a year but my work is sending me there again to my surprise.

So what's up, did this date happen?

 

[Airnest]

So what's up, did this date happen?

Maybe not. If it happened, OP would have already updated us. OP might have backed out if there was no fucking happening after dinner (with pay of course). That’s what I would have done.