The Anything Goes Thread

[Majestyk]

Just read this. Made me LOL.
Good morning!

 

[Lukes]

Just read this. Made me LOL.
Good morning!

View attachment 15587

The brilliance of that joke unfortunately will be lost on those that don't speak German. But I do

 

[Majestyk]

Yup, I’ve had to “esplanade” on occasion.

During the first few months of pandemic-forced WFH this year, I was absolutely “flabbergasted”.

ANNUAL NEOLOGISM CONTEST

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words. The winners are:

1. Coffee (N.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (V.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (V.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (Adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (Adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (V.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (N.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (N.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (N.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (N.), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (N.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (N), a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (N.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (N.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (N.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

 

[AMcguyver]

 

[Frenchy]

Thats the stuff . You cry . You sneeze. You shit and it kills your anus. It’s nearly spiritual

 

[TSullivan17]

Brow sweat incoming! Four hours.

 

[Frenchy]

Brow sweat incoming! Four hours.

No , thats Giuliani’s gig.

 

[Majestyk]

No , thats Giuliani’s gig.

That’s scary.

 

[TSullivan17]

Homie is like 80 years old and dyeing his hair. 40+ years or so and dis mofo hasn't discovered the close trim.

 

[Sudsy]

That’s scary.

View attachment 15592

We all know what black goo means....

 

[Majestyk]

We all know what black goo means....

Ooohhh ... That’s “Mr. Shadow” calling Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg.

 

[Frenchy]

Ooohhh ... That’s “Mr. Shadow” calling Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg.

guys , stop referencing French movies, that’s so gay

 

[Sudsy]

Ooohhh ... That’s “Mr. Shadow” calling Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg.

Says something about Giuliani's boss, eh?

 

[Durg50]

That’s scary.

View attachment 15592

Is he sweating shit?

 

[Frenchy]

Is he sweating shit?

he’s litterally dyeing

 

[MikeH]

he’s litterally dyeing

Oh fuck Frenchy, I am so proud of you. From a guy who claims not to understand dad jokes to a guy with the best dad joke in TAG history in one single swipe.

 

[just4fun]

Not hair dye........that's just shit seeping from his head.............

 

[hundreddollarman]

That’s scary.

View attachment 15592

When you find out the pretty girl from Kazakhstan is underage

 

[MikeH]

When you find out the pretty girl from Kazakhstan is underage

Nope, rather when you find out she is already fifteen and too old for you.

 

[Majestyk]

The late, great Alan Rickman absolutely had the best lines as the Sheriff of Nottingham in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.

Sheriff (to a wench): You. My room. 10:30 tonight.
Sheriff (to another wench): You. 10:45 ... And bring a friend.

 

[namae]

Not sure why Facebooks AI keeps feeding me BIGO LIVE ads ..... but they are nice eye candy - cute, plump Japanese girls in athletic/yoga wear.

Is BIGO a reference to "big" girls?

 

[Sudsy]

 

[Frenchy]

In a nondescript hotel somewhere in Ibaragi where at least there is the Stones concert in Cuba on NHK BS. And a honky tonk woman

 

[IchigoDave]

View attachment 15597

That sign is like the warning on Preparation H that says “do not take orally”. It is there for a reason.

 

[hundreddollarman]