I am just hoping that everything will be fine during the upcoming std check.........................
like akasam said , " you won't know what's going on in their mind" , and it was a big mistake to be receptive anal,because you are at the mercy of the other party........ "
a big lesson i learnt... hopefully not fatal....
Japan HIV awareness lags behind many of the developed countries.
In one instance, I happen to come across a japanese forum where a man was confused on how he can catch STD from Unprotected Anal Sex. His Argument was anal sex is not "normal sex" , so STD shouldn't affect this, because anal sex is not SEX, and STD only affects SEX.
Try to chill. I know its difficult and 9/10 it is guilt emotion driving your fears. By chance are you married or have girlfriend/boyfriend? I dont judge its just the fear can be ramped up guilty emotion.
First of all you don't actually give any indication she took the condom off, just your perception that if you were stroking that hard, it would have come off. But think about it. Did you hear the sound of stretched condom being snapped off? Did you feel a difference?
OK so lets pretend that for whatever reasons she does decide to take the condom and insert after:
1) It doesn't mean she has HIV. Yes prevalence can increase in certain communities. But HIV isn't in 100% of individuals of that "at risk community". While absolute numbers of HIV infections is high comparatively to say Ebola, it is still a rare occurrence.
2) IF she HIV positive and does not use protection, she will not infect 100% of individuals she has sexual encounters. Yes receptive anal is by far the most 'risky' exposure (that is sexual activity) but its still like a 3/100 chance?? Compared to other viruses, HIV is actually incredibly bad passing from human to human.
There are many reasons why it is such a low chance. One is that the virus itself is not very stable and can easily die, you really need blood to blood contact to guarantee transmission. Some cell linings are more transmissible, such as the anus (hence the higher risk) but the virus still has a hard time passing from one individual to the other. IF not blood, then semen contains the next highest levels of virus but it is far less. Furthermore, remember the body can actually do a great job of keeping the virus at bay, killing a great many of them. So the highest levels usually peak around 3-9 months and then it tails off (both in blood and semen) to pretty low levels for several years. It is debatable whether at this level transmission can actually occur. There is evidence to suggests most new exposures are from individuals who have been relatively newly infected themselves. Unfortunately, the virus does hide out in specific cells of the body, and slowly builds up to later overpower our immune system decades later the person will pass away from complications of other infections.
3) Those who know they are HIV infected, if they want to live, will take antiviral therapy. This therapy is incredible effective, so much that some people can still have children of there without the risk of infecting their partner. It can't remove all of the virus but it goes pretty far in doing it.
Of course, we can have debate about how poor sexual health education is in Japan but is it really true? There are idiots who don't get how biology works but many people do want to live a healthy life and aware of the risks. Don't paint everyone within a community with the same brush of a few ignorant individuals.
All this goes to say, you need to calm down, NOT that you shouldn't get tested. You should get tested on a regular basis, and particularly if you have had a high-risk exposure (anal receptive without condom). The only way to know if to get tested, I think if you told the doctor what happened, they would likely say you dont need to be tested BUT they always offer because they 'peace of mind' is what the patient really wants. Fancy 4th generation tests can detect antigens of HIV within 4 weeks and supposed to be concluded at 6 weeks. Older tests that detect the antibodies raised against HIV antigens varies on the individual, but they can pickup infection 4 weeks after exposure but the test will on be conclusive 12 weeks after exposure.
Sorry for such a long reply but I have been there. I get your feeling. My exposure was different and thinking back it was equally stupid to worry about it. Basically I went don't on a girl I didn't;t know. I didn't actually think about HIV risk at the time until the day after I was worried about some yeast infection I had on the all chap that I saw on reputable websites that cunnilingus does actually have a very small risk of HIV transmission. Of course when I read this my head was spinning, I was looking for days at the internet trying to understand how big a risk ( its an incredibly low risk, and some argue no risk at all) but point is at that time, I could not reason with my inner turmoil. I also felt incredibly guilty because basically I cheated on my girlfriend, now fiancé, it was HE massage that turned into something a lot more. I am for sure if I did not have a girlfriend at the time I would never even considered looking up the risk or worrying about my chap. It is the guilt that drives you.
It goes without saying, ALWAYS use protection with persons you dont know their recent STD check status, if you are really paranoid, ALWAYS use protection WITH your partner.
Don't fret, stop looking at google links (I bet your are), go see a doctor as they will tell your first hand how worried you should be, and will offer you a test.
IF you don't know already, there are great free testing in most major cities in Japan, I assume you are in Tokyo. They are anonymous and can also test for other STDs depending on the clinic. I am unsure how long ago your exposure was, but even if it was within 3 months, go get tested anyway for ease your worry/guilt but make sure if it is negative to get re checked at 12 weeks post exposure to make sure it is definitely negative.