I would buy a massive hard-sided suitcase and stand in various entranceways during peak hours.
If I had a traveling companion or made friends, id be sure to stand 5 metres apart and shout at them in order to communicate rather than standing near them.
Id need to keep my friends back home updated in real time on literally every thing i did, so i would enjoy speaking on the phone by holding it as far away from my mouth as possible and shouting at it in crowded areas, making sure to kind of zig-zag and stop randomly on busy pathways.
After all that id be hungry and thirsty so id go to gonpachi, goldengai and asian feeling and tell my friends back home that Id seen the ‘real japan’ that the guidebooks wont tell you about.