"Oh look, I'm being cool on the internet, somebody please love me hurr durr"
OK, to actually answer your question. Dai jobu, don't worry. I called them using my Skype. You can speak English, but you might be put on hold while the person answering the phones goes and gets the person who speaks English very well. He will take your name, ask you to make up a four digit number that will then be your identity for future visits. He will ask your preference in regards to a young lady, but no guarantee since you are a new customer. He will instruct you to call again at about 30 minutes before your appointment. He will instruct you to call again once you have checked into the love hotel.
I have always used Festae which is gaijin friendly and may have an English speaker around. If not, look at the wall across from the reception and choose a room, then pay. Next call JK. You will have to dial 0 (zero) then JK's number Oh, one more thing-when you check out, you will have to pay 10 Yen for each call you made:
http://www.festae.com/shinjuku/
PS: Please be nice, even to Mr. Chavers. His bark is worse than his bite. Admin will always be helpful and others, as well, as long as you are a bit humble and respectful. After you post a bit you can loosen up.
BTW: I have been in Japan for seventeen years and still do not own a cell phone. Since I don't have any friends, I don't need one-haha!
Best of luck and please post a review.
One Love!