Guest viewing is limited

5 Questions About Picking Up Girls (from A Young Newb In Tokyo)

Previous comments taken on board.

If women are often flirting with a guy. The experience of being in such a position should breed confidence for the guy. One of the things women find attractive about men is this kind of confidence at communicating on a one-to-one level. The so-called 'beautiful' guys should therefore have a pretty decent 'game' after interacting with numerous ladies. If these guys can't communicate with women, I don't know what is up with them.
 
MossBoss said:
Previous comments taken on board.

If women are often flirting with a guy. The experience of being in such a position should breed confidence for the guy. One of the things women find attractive about men is this kind of confidence at communicating on a one-to-one level. The so-called 'beautiful' guys should therefore have a pretty decent 'game' after interacting with numerous ladies. If these guys can't communicate with women, I don't know what is up with them.
Click to expand...

You and me both.

Though I am open to the possibility that communication may be difficult for me and whatever person I'm with due to my extremely niche interests (horror movies, heavy metal, samurai movies, art and weird, wet sex) and difficulty understanding or even attempting to talk about the usual stuff people are into (sports, hip hop / pop music, romantic comedies and other uninteresting stuff), I can't say for sure that this is the issue. Regardless, I'd love to try to improve my communication skills and I'm trying to become more familiar with the Japanese language as a starting point. Beyond that, I don't know what I'll do...

Basically, this is me (in ANY country):

http://www.theonion.com/articles/man-trying-to-enter-conversation-spends-few-minute,37428/

So I went to a different HUB around midnight last night, and some kind guy started chatting me up in English, then introducing himself to random women and dragging me over. Kind of cool, right? Except that resulted in a very drunk 36 year old (who totally looked her age and was definitely never a 'looker' at any point in her life) clinging to my arm and trying desperately to communicate with and hug me.

I noticed that the few girls there who seemed to be closer to my age, and pretty, were already with a Japanese guy or group of people.

So more advice please! How would you guys approach a group of all-Japanese? Or two women? Where would you start? Or is that just weird no matter what? Is the best bet trying to befriend some Japanese guys so there's no awkward loneliness attempting to intrude on anyone else's fun?
 
lovesickdead said:
So I went to a different HUB around midnight last night, and some kind guy started chatting me up in English, then introducing himself to random women and dragging me over. Kind of cool, right? Except that resulted in a very drunk 36 year old (who totally looked her age and was definitely never a 'looker' at any point in her life) clinging to my arm and trying desperately to communicate with and hug me
Click to expand...

Lucky! You have great opportunities to hone your skills on drunken hub gals. Use these opportunities so when you meet a girl more to your liking you will be perform much better.
 
I've always found that sitting at an adjoining table to other people and just striking up a conversation is the best way to go. I know it's hard to do. Meeting new people can be frightening, but honestly a lot of people are at the Hub to talk to foreigners or experience (the Japanese version of) Western society, so a foreigner expressing interest in them might just make their night. The Hub is usually playing a soccer or baseball game, so ask them if they are Yankees fans (or whatever).

I went one time with a friend of mine and sat at an adjoining table to these two college girls and started talking to them. They kept getting approached by different guys trying to chat them up...I swear it was like a swarm of bees surrounding them that they kept swatting away, meanwhile my friend and I just kept talking to them. Yeah, in some cases you end up just being English language practice, but once you get over the hump of meeting them, with a bit of skill you might be able to convert them into a sex friend, etc.
 
  • Like
Reactions: User#3673 and Nitr0
Wwanderer said:
If they are not, how could they be considered attractive??? ;)

-Ww
Click to expand...
Definitely not very intelligent if they are.......otherwise why would you be? :p
 
Hmmm...
I guess, you can think you are or you're not good looking. This is such a relative notion. I guess it's better to be assertive and then to think you are.

But about being attractive, if you're not delusional, it's just a fact. You are above or below average. If you catch easily eyes contacts or interests, you are attractive. If not, you can still work on it, but you're definitely not attractive.

But true, I'm a bit amused by the description of a super good looking guy looking for recommendation to pick up girls. I would tend to say that if you are good looking and assertive (and you seem quite assertive in your comment), it shouldn't be an issue at all.
All the guys I know who think they are good looking (and some are not by any standards) are real womanizers. At the end of the day, girls like assertive guys.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MossBoss
hkAlone said:
Hmmm...
I guess, you can think you are or you're not good looking. This is such a relative notion. I guess it's better to be assertive and then to think you are.

But about being attractive, if you're not delusional, it's just a fact. You are above or below average. If you catch easily eyes contacts or interests, you are attractive. If not, you can still work on it, but you're definitely not attractive.

But true, I'm a bit amused by the description of a super good looking guy looking for recommendation to pick up girls. I would tend to say that if you are good looking and assertive (and you seem quite assertive in your comment), it shouldn't be an issue at all.
All the guys I know who think they are good looking (and some are not by any standards) are real womanizers. At the end of the day, girls like assertive guys.
Click to expand...
I've found that really hot girls like bad guys......
 
Looks might get you an interview, but don't guarantee they'll get you the job. Obviously confidence & social skills are important, but having correct body language a fun personality & understanding of the culture could help.
 
  • Like
Reactions: User#6326
Go to heavy metal concerts.

In Japan, girls listen to heavy metal.

At a typical heavy metal concert, the crowd will be 50/50 guys and girls.

And the girls that listen to heavy metal are also girls that you would want to fuck.

Unlike the US.


lovesickdead said:
Hello TAG,



Additionally, what topics of conversation would you suggest avoiding? I like heavy metal and horror movies, but in all my history with the opposite sex, it doesn't usually seem to provide any common ground ;P

Cheers!
Click to expand...
 
  • Like
Reactions: just4fun
I will be In Japan for the second time. The first time I was mostly in Tokyo, and since I was in a serious relationship, I didn't try to much to look for clubs.
Plus the friend that was with me was one of the worst wingman possible, so even that we planned to go party, it never happened. We only went to golden gai, since it was really close to our hotel.

In May I am returning, but I will only spend 5 days in Tokyo, from wednesday til sunday. And this time I would like to go to clubs/bars and actually meet people. And ofc, if possible, why not getting to know some girls. Last time I felt the language was the biggest barrier. I tried my day-game, for example in Ikebukuro, because the next day was 14st February. But even that the girls seem to "like" my "charm", they didn't speak english and they seem shy.

Anyway, I wanted to ask if in that case, those clubs in Roppongi, recommended by @Solong , are the best start?
To be honest I don't want to go to a typical "newbie" place, where all tourist goes. I would like to try some Gaijin bars, because since we don't speak japanese at all (even that we speak around 4 different languages), is best to go to a place where we have more chance to have nice talk with people in english. Not trying to offend no one, but I think my game (or just having a good moment in general) would have a better outcome in a place that is not crowded with "thirsty"/drunk tourists.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.