Communication etiquette between SB/SD

[Frenchy]

it’s something that often puzzled me... I must be old school but usually when someone writes me I answer relatively quickly. Even If I’m sick or busy I say so, takes just a few seconds to text it, no big deal.

But I noticed that in this wonderful land of Sugar it seems totally ok to cancel dates at the last moment, ghost someone for days or even weeks , then suddenly re-appear out of the blue with lame / vague excuses which sound like BS (“I was sick”, “my mum came” etc) and continue the dialog as if nothing had happened inbetween. I find that rude and frankly very unappealing.

Just texted “Odaijini” to a pot-SB who seems constantly sick and had already cancelled our first date. Too bad, she seemed really nice at the M&G meeting.

 

[faboo2001]

I'm pretty old school in that way as well. I return calls or texts pretty quickly and try to reply back to emails within 24 hours if possible.

But regarding communications with a SB specifically, I think part of it is that sometimes the girl speaking to and involved with multiple Daddies. When she takes a while to reply back or just simply ghosts you it might be because she's currently busy with another SD and doesn't want to tell you that fact as she still wants to keep you as an option. Last minute date cancellations though, a dick move unless there's a legitimate reason.

 

[oLUXo]

I understand the quick responses, but I try not to respond right away. The reason being is that then it becomes an argument later about why you didn't text for so long, etc. I at least respond daily, but usually more than one liners. It also keeps the conversations from being too stale when you meet. If you've already talked about everything through texts, there is not much else to talk about in person. This is just my preference, but I prefer to talk more in person than texting back and forth. Also, if I'm busy at work or doing another activity, I don't want my phone blowing up with texts and calls as it's a bit annoying.

I definitely don't cancel dates or appointments last minute unless it's out of my control, but it has happened once in a blue moon.

 

[Frenchy]

I'm pretty old school in that way as well. I return calls or texts pretty quickly and try to reply back to emails within 24 hours if possible.

But regarding communications with a SB specifically, I think part of it is that sometimes the girl speaking to and involved with multiple Daddies. When she takes a while to reply back or just simply ghosts you it might be because she's currently busy with another SD and doesn't want to tell you that fact as she still wants to keep you as an option. Last minute date cancellations though, a dick move unless there's a legitimate reason.

Thanks. Yes obviously but I really don’t care if there are other guys and she tells me or doesn’t tell me , especially at such an early stage. But if a girl cancels just before the meeting coz she’s sick (might be true after all) , and I reply « ok , sorry to hear that, when are you available next week? » and she takes the whole week to answer back, it just shows a complete lack of respect.
And the older I get the less patience I have for obvious BS.

 

[Frenchy]

I understand the quick responses, but I try not to respond right away. The reason being is that then it becomes an argument later about why you didn't text for so long, etc. I at least respond daily, but usually more than one liners. It also keeps the conversations from being too stale when you meet. If you've already talked about everything through texts, there is not much else to talk about in person. This is just my preference, but I prefer to talk more in person than texting back and forth. Also, if I'm busy at work or doing another activity, I don't want my phone blowing up with texts and calls as it's a bit annoying.

I definitely don't cancel dates or appointments last minute unless it's out of my control, but it has happened once in a blue moon.

I get what you mean, there’s another who has the opposite , annoying habit of answering quasi-immediately all the time and that bothers me too

 

[oLUXo]

I get what you mean, there’s another who has the opposite , annoying habit of answering quasi-immediately all the time and that bothers me too

But Mike just likes to prove he is right so it's ok

 

[Frenchy]

But Mike just likes to prove he is right so it's ok

Lol! Yeah, was not thinking about him though but come to think of it I should introduce those two to each other. They would text all the time and never fuck

 

[Desktop]

Isn’t this the flakiness of dating in general but sometimes the need of cash makes them come back? In a normal dating situation they might be just as flaky.

 

[Frenchy]

Isn’t this the flakiness of dating in general but sometimes the need of cash makes them come back? In a normal dating situation they might be just as flaky.

True . To be honest I don’t have much recent experience of “dating in general”
Actually it’s not even just about dating . If you miss a meeting and the other person asks you when are you available next , a “normal” person would not wait 1 week radio-silent to give an answer. Anyway, she’s off the list now. Pissed me off from the start .

 

[oLUXo]

True . To be honest I don’t have much recent experience of “dating in general”
Actually it’s not even just about dating . If you miss a meeting and the other person asks you when are you available next , a “normal” person would not wait 1 week radio-silent to give an answer. Anyway, she’s off the list now. Pissed me off from the start .

I had a few like that before as well. Easy to just scratch them off the list.

 

[vargas]

But I noticed that in this wonderful land of Sugar it seems totally ok to cancel dates at the last moment, ghost someone for days or even weeks , then suddenly re-appear out of the blue with lame / vague excuses which sound like BS (“I was sick”, “my mum came” etc) and continue the dialog as if nothing had happened inbetween. I find that rude and frankly very unappealing.

I've been annoyed by this too, not after establishing a fairly steady relationship but before. Generally just assume that they have some daddies already, but maybe things are a little rocky and they're hedging. Or just spent too much on brand name goods that month and need some extra cash.

And of course sugaring doesn't attract your normal, levelheaded, hard working girls with their lives together haha

 

[Frenchy]

And of course sugaring doesn't attract your normal, levelheaded, hard working girls with their lives together haha

I’ve met a few exceptions but yes, overall its true.
But hey they are sooooo good at writing or saying “sorry but...” afterwards. If I had saved 10k each time I got the “sorry but...” [ then take your pick: sick/periods/travelled abroad/ too much study/ family came/ hangover / puppy is sick/ no wifi etc] I would be a millionaire by now.

Doesnt even matter if its true or not , why writing it so long after the (supposed) facts?

 

[vargas]

Doesnt even matter if its true or not , why writing it so long after the (supposed) facts?

They want to keep the opportunity open, not so dissimilar from regular girls who have a bf but keep other guys available just in case that sort is usually bad about responding in a timely fashion or meeting up too. Plus I don't suppose these sugar babes are trying to be mean, don't want you to dislike them, so try to come up with a believable excuse rather than "someone else is paying me more/has more potential/is more attractive/whatever"

 

[Frenchy]

They want to keep the opportunity open, not so dissimilar from regular girls who have a bf but keep other guys available just in case that sort is usually bad about responding in a timely fashion or meeting up too. Plus I don't suppose these sugar babes are trying to be mean, don't want you to dislike them, so try to come up with a believable excuse rather than "someone else is paying me more/has more potential/is more attractive/whatever"

Yeah , but here’s the thing: I may actually prefer they say frankly “I’m currently with other guy(s)” , can’t answer immediately as I don’t know the schedule yet”. Prefer that to BS and especially to late BS.

 

[vargas]

Yeah , but here’s the thing: I may actually prefer they say frankly “I’m currently with other guy(s)” , can’t answer immediately as I don’t know the schedule yet”. Prefer that to BS and especially to late BS.

Haha yeah I get you, and agree. That's a very masculine approach to communication though bit too direct for most women I'd say. And I suppose even most sugar daddies don't want reminders of what the relationship is really about but yeah it's also very rude and selfish because clearly a big reason is hedging their bets. Last time I tried sugar I met a really gorgeous girl, easily an 8-9 but she kept rescheduling and so "next", just not worth it.

 

[MikeH]

But Mike just likes to prove he is right so it's ok

Close but no cigar. I am always right so that doesn't need proving.

I answer fast because I like to show off that I am right.

I usually message my girls once per day. If they message me more then they still get answered in bulk once in a day.

I always keep my phone in silent anyway so I am not bothered if they message me all the time; of course they would, it's me they want to communicate with!

 

[Frenchy]

Close but no cigar. I am always right so that doesn't need proving.

I answer fast because I like to show off that I am right.

I usually message my girls once per day. If they message me more then they still get answered in bulk once in a day.

I always keep my phone in silent anyway so I am not bothered if they message me all the time; of course they would, it's me they want to communicate with!

Oh don’t be delusional... mine may just want the ¥¥¥, yours just want the BO, anyway all greedy sluts except Mum!

 

[MikeH]

That's a very masculine approach to communication though bit too direct for most women I'd say.

Well, the smart girls would go "my aunt is visiting me right now, I don't know my schedule yet but will contact as soon as I know". In any customer oriented service business it's not good idea to keep the customer hanging.

 

[BB0523]

It is especially rude if you are using an app where u can see when they were last active .. Shows that they are ignoring you . .Unless they have sooo many in the que ur not getting visibility ...I'm old school as well ...Reply when written to same day if possible otherwise no point in the reply at all .
One technique to try is ask the schedule for next free day and just wait. ..If they reply then take the same amount of time they did.. .I know a bit immature ..But it often helps for future communication .

Don't forget ..It's all about "me" or "them" when exchanging msgs . . So easy to get offended

 

[Frenchy]

It is especially rude if you are using an app where u can see when they were last active .. Shows that they are ignoring you . .Unless they have sooo many in the que ur not getting visibility ...I'm old school as well ...Reply when written to same day if possible otherwise no point in the reply at all .
One technique to try is ask the schedule for next free day and just wait. ..If they reply then take the same amount of time they did.. .I know a bit immature ..But it often helps for future communication .

Don't forget ..It's all about "me" or "them" when exchanging msgs . . So easy to get offended

Good points, thanks

 

[scorpioni6ths]

True . To be honest I don’t have much recent experience of “dating in general”
Actually it’s not even just about dating . If you miss a meeting and the other person asks you when are you available next , a “normal” person would not wait 1 week radio-silent to give an answer. Anyway, she’s off the list now. Pissed me off from the start .

first you must accept the fact that you're probably not the only SD she has ... if that other, maybe richer, SD is touring with her ... you won't get any replies. she's busy ~

longest i've waited was a month before my messaged was "Read" ... another week for a reply and weird part ... i'm still seing this girl

 

[Frenchy]

longest i've waited was a month before my messaged was "Read" ... another week for a reply and weird part ... i'm still seing this girl

Just out of curiosity , how did she explain the 1 month wait? And did you not feel neglected , like, at all? (Come on, be honest )

 

[vargas]

Well, the smart girls would go "my aunt is visiting me right now, I don't know my schedule yet but will contact as soon as I know". In any customer oriented service business it's not good idea to keep the customer hanging.

But everyone knows the aunt doesn't visit that frequently or irregularly plus, at least in my experience, sugar babes have no concept of customer service. If you want that better to go with an escort.

 

[vargas]

Just out of curiosity , how did she explain the 1 month wait? And did you not feel neglected , like, at all? (Come on, be honest )

Easy solution for that, just have other girls handy For every girl you're really into but she doesn't reciprocate, need one who is cuter or warmer or sexier. Then it's not such a big deal if she doesn't reply but yeah kinda expensive to do with sugar babes. I've gone back and forth on the subject but come to the conclusion that a real girlfriend or two is better even if they get terribly emotional sometimes.

 

[MikeH]

But everyone knows the aunt doesn't visit that frequently or irregularly plus

She might have a large family! Just wait until the water buffalo gets sick.