Do you ever go out alone?

[Chocoballs]

I tried going to bars by myself a few times but I always felt too self-conscious. Standing alone in a bar makes me miserable

 

[User#18046]

I tried going to bars by myself a few times but I always felt too self-conscious. Standing alone in a bar makes me miserable

I've never liked going to bars alone if my goal is to meet people. I have never been attractive enough to compete in an environment that depends almost entirely on physical beauty. That said, when I do go out, I'm usually alone but I sing karaoke or I take my MacBook and write, in which case I choose peaceful bars with good whiskey.

 

[Jbagz]

Almost always go alone, especially if wanting to pick up someone for a one nighter.

 

[Quietlife]

At a good and friendly bar with great staff you never stay alone for long. I have met some great people while out alone. My local bar has many people out on their own - male and female, foreigners and Japanese. Just dive in and meet people.

 

[TheScientist]

I can go to a bar, a movie, whatever by myself. I don't understand hesitancy about that.

 

[User#8628]

No. I really don't see the point in doing it without at least knowing anyone there.
Maybe possible if you know the crowd or the people who work there but i wouldn't go somewhere just by myself.

 

[Quietlife]

I really don't see the point in doing it without at least knowing anyone there.

There's always a first time to meet anyone . Chance meetings can lead to everything from a short but interesting chat to a lifelong friendship. Of course, it might be simply boring, increase ones sense of isolation or lead to hassle, but I do enjoy the opportunity to discover new people.

 

[User#8628]

There's always a first time to meet anyone . Chance meetings can lead to everything from a short but interesting chat to a lifelong friendship. Of course, it might be simply boring, increase ones sense of isolation or lead to hassle, but I do enjoy the opportunity to discover new people.

Yes but you also might get bothered by people you'd rather not get to know better and an environment with alcohol is not the safest.

 

[User#18046]

Yes but you also might get bothered by people you'd rather not get to know better and an environment with alcohol is not the safest.

If you are a pretty blonde girl with a gorgeous neck and steely blue eyes, you might get bothered. Some of us melt quite easily into anonymity whether we want to or not.

 

[User#8628]

If you are a pretty blonde girl with a gorgeous neck and steely blue eyes, you might get bothered. Some of us melt quite easily into anonymity whether we want to or not.

I'm not talking only about girls though, some men who wander off alone to unfamiliar places get drugged and have their credit cards stolen.

 

[User#6517]

Most of my friends prefer bars while I prefer nightclubs.. and almost all of them can't handle their alcohol and/or don't like staying up all night.. so I usually go out alone.

As much as I love going out solo.. there are times I wish I had friends to party with. There are pros and cons to it.

PROS

1) You don't have to leave the bar/club when your friends get tired or bored. You can leave whenever you feel like it.

2) You don't have to take care of your drunk friends. I don't mean to sound heartless. I'm just saying that some people can get REALLY loud and annoying when they get totally wasted.

3) You can improve your social skills by not just talking to your group of friends. You can start up conversations with other customers, bartenders, DJs, etc.

4) You won't have friends around filming you when the alcohol hits you.. and hits you hard. You probably won't care at that moment.. but once you sober up and realize that they've uploaded it online..

5) If you think your friends are more fun/attractive than you, then you can just get rid of potential competition by not bringing them along with you. LOL.

6) If your friends are ghetto, obnoxious, etc.. then you can avoid the "guilt by association" thing by not hanging out with them when you're looking for a one-night-stand or a romantic fling. People can judge you by the crowd you're hanging out with, and you wouldn't want to make a bad impression when you're searching for "love" or whatever.

CONS

1) If you pay to get into a club, and you find out that it's pretty empty inside, then that's going to suck. At least when you have friends around, you can talk to them while waiting for more people to arrive.

2) If you're alone, especially as a woman, and someone approaches you and there's something off about them or they start harassing you.. it can be a scary experience. When you have good friends around, they should be able to help you out in these scenarios.

3) Dancing with friends is more fun than dancing with strangers.. in my opinion.

 

[Chocoballs]

I can go to a bar, a movie, whatever by myself. I don't understand hesitancy about that.

I can go to a movie by myself. But at a bar, I would think that everyone is looking at me and thinks "that loser is standing there all alone". Of course no one cares but that is just the thought that goes through my mind.

 

[e-smile]

I never went to a bar or even a cafe alone unless I had to (for example to use wifi while waiting for something or someone).
not that I'm afraid or something, I just think I'd get bored.
in my home country people can spend hours in a cafe alone reading newspaper or watching walkers. I envy them.

 

[Kulbutor]

Almost always go alone, especially if wanting to pick up someone for a one nighter.

Agree 100%!

Never go in duo if you want meet!

 

[Kulbutor]

3) Dancing with friends is more fun than dancing with strangers.. in my opinion.

Nope dear!

in my opinion

 

[Kulbutor]

There's always a first time to meet anyone . Chance meetings can lead to everything from a short but interesting chat to a lifelong friendship. Of course, it might be simply boring, increase ones sense of isolation or lead to hassle, but I do enjoy the opportunity to discover new people.

Yeah,
nothing is more depressive that to go and return with always the same people... every time, every months, all year

 

[e-smile]

I guess if you're a man and you come with male friends.. it wouldn't be that much fun.. but since I hang out with cute girls whenever the opportunity does arise..

it actually is fun if they are really your friends.

 

[User#6517]

it actually is fun if they are really your friends.

Well then.. nevermind

 

[Kulbutor]

it actually is fun if they are really your friends.

Frankly i NEVER saw a female alone in a night club, except if she "works" obviously...

 

[Pansexual latina]

I go alone to many places and let me tell you it is great. Aside from the strange looks i get from time to time i now prefer to do almost anything alone. I take myself out to eat alone, going out to a bar alone is a great way to meet friends and i love traveling alone because for some reason people pity me for being alone and i get all sorts of cool experiences. People just find me as a friendly face and will approach me and tell me their stories and i genuinely enjoy that.

 

[User#8628]

Why does everyone say that if you come with your friends you have to leave with them though?
We're adults. If someone wants to go home and the other has landed well in a nice atomsphere and met some new people who seem decent, i dont see a problem with spitting up later.
And what happened to the "wingman" idea? Isn't it supposed to be easier to hook up with people if you have friends who can also mingle.

 

[Jbagz]

Why does everyone say that if you come with your friends you have to leave with them though?
We're adults. If someone wants to go home and the other has landed well in a nice atomsphere and met some new people who seem decent, i dont see a problem with spitting up later.
And what happened to the "wingman" idea? Isn't it supposed to be easier to hook up with people if you have friends who can also mingle.

It depends on if you have friends that are on the same wavelength or not.

It has been rare that I've had friends that wouldn't mind if I left them to get home by themselves.

I've never had a true wingman, in that we'd help each other hook up.

 

[namae]

I tried going to bars by myself a few times but I always felt too self-conscious. Standing alone in a bar makes me miserable

I think you need more practice. It takes a while to get comfortable with your own company - bars, restaurants, travel. If your feeling self-conscious, and look a little tense or gloomy then you will not be attractive to any potential friends/acquaintances. You have to bring your smile with you.

 

[Wwanderer]

If I have a friend or friends or a date available, I almost always prefer to go out with them, but if not, I have no problem or unpleasant feelings going out to restaurants, bars, nightclubs, movies or whatever by myself...and it often turns out to be fun and satisfying. When traveling to a place (city or country or...) for the first time, I prefer to spend *some* of the time out alone because I pay more attention to my surroundings and soak in the new experience more thoroughly when I am not directing a part of my attention to my companion.

Basically I agree with @MissInsomnia; both have their pros and cons.

-Ww

 

[TheScientist]

If I have a friend or friends or a date available, I almost always prefer to go out with them, but if not, I have no problem or unpleasant feelings going out to restaurants, bars, nightclubs, movies or whatever by myself...and it often turns out to be fun and satisfying. When traveling to a place (city or country or...) for the first time, I prefer to spend *some* of the time out alone because I pay more attention to my surroundings and soak in the new experience more thoroughly when I am not directing a part of my attention to my companion.

Basically I agree with @MissInsomnia; both have their pros and cons.

-Ww

Having seen similar discussions in other forums with similar patterns, I wonder how much of this is generational? Us older folks seem to have been much more willing from a younger age to venture out on our own according to my observations.