Help with low key SB date venue

[krabb]

I have kind of the opposite question to what Frenchy posed in his post about date planning so I thought I'd ask you guys and ladies for your advice since I'm relatively new to SB dating.

I've got a second date set for this weekend and we're both clear this one will involve intimacy.

What I need to figure out is where to take her for the "intimate" part of the date since she's not keen on a love hotel. A bit of background: she's a university student and it seems like this is her first SB experience. She also lives with her family and has a curfew.

So I honestly have no idea where Japanese secondary/university students go when they want to have sex but I can understand why she isn't into the LH idea. Does anyone have any suggestions? I could book a regular hotel but since the agreement is to end our dates before 11PM (last train, she seems to live way out, Kanagawa I think) that seems like a waste. Seriously, where do young people go? I'm honestly curious.

BTW the first half of the date is all set. When we met up a couple weeks back we figured out food preferences, what types of places she likes to hang out, etc. Good news for me is her tastes seem very down to earth and student-like, for lack of a better term.

 

[MikeH]

If she says she doesn't like love hotels she actually means she wants to come to your home.

I only do hotels so any girl who is not keen on them will be a pass for me. Your mileage might vary.

 

[krabb]

Interesting, I never would have read it that way. Or maybe I'm taking you too literally.

But since my place isn't an option, back to square one.

 

[Frenchy]

Errr... a normal hotel?

 

[Desktop]

Book a APA hotel nearby.

 

[krabb]

Errr... a normal hotel?

Yeah I mentioned in the first post a hotel is the fallback.

My question was more about alternatives. The goal is to make this feel like a regular date as much as that can be made possible.

I've only had one other SB relationship which was back when I lived in Korea. She was a bit off her rocker and it ended badly but I remember we'd mix up weekends away at proper hotels with "DVD room" (literal translation) places in Seoul which were very inexpensive. It's kind of a couples thing for the youngsters.

 

[Frenchy]

Yeah I mentioned in the first post a hotel is the fallback.

My question was more about alternatives. The goal is to make this feel like a regular date as much as that can be made possible.

I've only had one other SB relationship which was back when I lived in Korea. She was a bit off her rocker and it ended badly but I remember we'd mix up weekends away at proper hotels with "DVD room" (literal translation) places in Seoul which were very inexpensive. It's kind of a couples thing for the youngsters.

Private booth for two in an internet café ?

 

[krabb]

"DVD room" (literal translation) places in Seoul which were very inexpensive.

And some of them were actually pretty nice.

 

[Frenchy]

And some of them were actually pretty nice.

There are cheap rooms for few hours rents in some locations (Shimbashi notably) which don’t feel like hotels but I never tried.
You can also try a karaoke booth...

 

[krabb]

Private booth for two in an internet café ?

Thanks @Frenchy

Intriguing. Tell me more!

Is there enough privacy? I went to a mangaきっさ once and got yelled at for talking on the phone.

Guessing you have some other type of place in mind?

 

[Frenchy]

Thanks @Frenchy

Intriguing. Tell me more!

Is there enough privacy? I went to a mangaきっさ once and got yelled at for talking on the phone.

Guessing you have some other type of place in mind?

Seriously no, I don’t recommend you to do that there ... your SB may think you’re a weirdo cheapstake. And everybody around could hear you. But for some couples I know its a turn on, or whatever they watch together makes them horny ...

 

[MikeH]

There are cheap rooms for few hours rents in some locations (Shimbashi notably) which don’t feel like hotels but I never tried.

You mean rental rooms? Well, if the SB is not fond of love hotels she will just sprint home and never return if you try to bring her to a rental room.

 

[Desktop]

Rent an airbnb put some photos up & say it’s your buddy’s place that he let you use.

 

[BB0523]

@Desktop says is the best alternative ,check in before u meet and make sure the place is ok. .. Hide all the Airbnb instructions if u choose to use "it's my buddies place " . Otherwise just take her to the Airbnb apt . Of course it will seem like a waste just like a hotel. ..But not much u can do about that. . ..

 

[MikeH]

Hide all the Airbnb instructions if u choose to use "it's my buddies place "

If she was really hot and it was just for one night then I think that is a good advice. But if you are trying to build an SB relationship then that becomes a drag very soon. That's why I said I personally pass any girl who doesn't do hotels for a long term relationship.

 

[Frenchy]

If she was really hot and it was just for one night then I think that is a good advice. But if you are trying to build an SB relationship then that becomes a drag very soon. That's why I said I personally pass any girl who doesn't do hotels for a long term relationship.

Yeah you’re right. Besides if she’s so picky she could propose her alternative ideas too...
OP: why does she hate the idea of a LH so much? I met quite many (too many in fact) ladies and never happened once . If she’s afraid of being seen just go to a more distant location , like Kinshicho or some similar place

 

[Browcoco]

Why not rent an apartment for her? That way you don’t have the curfew problem OR the love hotel problem

I kid of course, but this kind of logistical problem is why I also would shy away from women with curfews and women who dislike LHs.

Maybe it’s that she is concerned that any LH you take her will be run down (I tend to avoid Dogenzaka for this reason...)? Perhaps one of the Bali An locations (which are expensive but I think generally nicer than run of the mill LHs) or other upscale place would be better?

I agree that a rental room is likely to have her running away screaming. Ditto on the manga kissa idea (or its relative, a karaoke box).

 

[Frenchy]

I agree that a rental room is likely to have her running away screaming. Ditto on the manga kissa idea (or its relative, a karaoke box).

Sigh... tough crowd...
ok so its not comfortable and not meant to be for that purpose but I guarantee you, being naughty in a karaoke is something to try at least once!

 

[Browcoco]

ok so its not comfortable and not meant to be for that purpose but I guarantee you, being naughty in a karaoke is something to try at least once!

Haha I do agree on all of those points. But this may not be the right situation for OP.

 

[Desktop]

Maybe she just doesn’t want to be intimate. If this is the case you should know upfront if this is what you are expecting & this is not what she wants.

 

[Ddddd]

What about AirBnB?

 

[krabb]

Maybe she just doesn’t want to be intimate. If this is the case you should know upfront if this is what you are expecting & this is not what she wants.

Nope, we are clear on that as per the second paragraph in the original post.

The first date we had was to sort out chemistry and terms which we even wrote out semi formally.

Thanks for the concern though.

 

[Frenchy]

Nope, we are clear on that as per the second paragraph in the original post.

The first date we had was to sort out chemistry and terms which we even wrote out semi formally.

Thanks for the concern though.

Good idea to write terms down. Never did it but wish I had, for some of them

 

[krabb]

Good idea to write terms down. Never did it but wish I had, for some of them

It's nothing fancy, just a list of things and scenarios to make stuff explicit. It's ultimately a bunch of bullet points in an email.

 

[Frenchy]

It's nothing fancy, just a list of things and scenarios to make stuff explicit. It's ultimately a bunch of bullet points in an email.

The form is not important, and the contents can be revised over time , but I guess it allows you to fix « on paper » the stuff you really want/need and also as importantly what you DON’T want . I always thought that it may be rude or awkward to be too explicit . That it kills the « vibe » in a way. But I was wrong. At some point I was very explicit on my SA profile though...