Herpes

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fareastmovement

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I recently discovered that the girl I am seeing has had oral herpes (HSV-1) since she was still in high school. She has not had an outbreak for a few years now though so my main concern is virus shredding when she is not having an outbreak. Towards that end, I asked her that we can no longer do french kiss and no bbbj. Is there any other precaution I should take in order to minimize the risk of me getting it? Perusing the internet has not given me anything useful so far..

p.s. I myself have nothing against Herpes but since I am married, I want to be as cautious as possible.
 
A loooot of people have HSV-1. You can already have it and never had an outbreak. It’s very hard to prevent it really, cause it transmits skin-skin. You can change the girl. :p
 
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Might want to get tested yourself - I forget where you're from, but in some countries it's estimated that up to 90% of adults will have been exposed to HSV-1 by the time they are 50. There's a surprisingly high chance that you're already carrying it.

Also worth mentioning that up to 20% are carriers of HSV-2. Far more common than people think.
 
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Sudsy said:
Might want to get tested yourself - I forget where you're from, but in some countries it's estimated that up to 90% of adults will have been exposed to HSV-1 by the time they are 50. There's a surprisingly high chance that you're already carrying it.

Also worth mentioning that up to 20% are carriers of HSV-2. Far more common than people think.
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I am from a SEA country, and herpes is not really prevalent there. That statistics is most likely from the US or Canada. I was thinking about going to get tested as well but waiting a bit since I only discovered this fact a few days ago and the last unsafe encounter with her was less than a week ago.
 
Majora said:
A loooot of people have HSV-1. You can already have it and never had an outbreak. It’s very hard to prevent it really, cause it transmits skin-skin. You can change the girl. :p
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Skin to skin? I thought oral herpes can only come from the mouth? :nailbiting:
Changing the girl... but I have finally found someone perfect in my book :(
 
fareastmovement said:
I am from a SEA country, and herpes is not really prevalent there.
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HSV-1 is still present in nearly 50% of the population in most SEA countries - it doesn't require mouth-to-mouth contact to spread. A very common vector is grandparents kissing grandchildren on the cheek.
 
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TAG Manager said:
This data is old... but I don’t expect that the numbers have changed so much:

http://www.who.int/news-room/detail...are-infected-with-herpes-simplex-virus-type-1
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I fully understand how prevalent herpes is globally. It is just that in my country it is not a very popular thing. I have gone all my life without seeing anyone with the symptoms and it has never been discussed/known among local mongers. Thus I am getting tested soon, because if I already have it then unlucky me (or lucky me since i can safely go back to dfk with her :LOL:)
 
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fareastmovement said:
if I already have it then unlucky me (or lucky me since i can safely go back to dfk with her :LOL:)
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Haha - that was exactly the point I was trying to make :) You might already have it, and if you do, carry on!
 
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fareastmovement said:
I fully understand how prevalent herpes is globally. It is just that in my country it is not a very popular thing. I have gone all my life without seeing anyone with the symptoms and it has never been discussed/known among local mongers. Thus I am getting tested soon, because if I already have it then unlucky me (or lucky me since i can safely go back to dfk with her :LOL:)
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Many adult men just don’t get symptoms even if they have it.
 
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fareastmovement said:
It is just that in my country it is not a very popular thing. I have gone all my life without seeing anyone with the symptoms and it has never been discussed/known among local mongers.
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Just because you don’t see anyone with symptoms doesn’t mean they don’t carry it. Just because someone doesn’t tell you they have it, doesn’t mean they don’t have it, perhaps they just don’t want to tell you or perhaps they don’t even know they have it. Without being tested you wouldn’t ‘know’ unless you’re symptomatic.

You asked her to no longer French kiss you, but what about regular kisses? Her mouth on you anywhere? To address your original question, what you can do to minimize getting it from your girl, if you haven’t contracted it already, would be to stop seeing her or just be platonic. But really you don’t know if the next girl has it either. Or the next time a relative or close friend kisses you on the cheek...
 
J
fareastmovement said:
I recently discovered that the girl I am seeing has had oral herpes (HSV-1) since she was still in high school. She has not had an outbreak for a few years now though so my main concern is virus shredding when she is not having an outbreak. Towards that end, I asked her that we can no longer do french kiss and no bbbj. Is there any other precaution I should take in order to minimize the risk of me getting it? Perusing the internet has not given me anything useful so far..

p.s. I myself have nothing against Herpes but since I am married, I want to be as cautious as possible.
Click to expand...
If she has not had an outbreak in several years, and if when she did have outbreaks they were far between (like once or twice a year), then the likelihood of you contracting it from her is very low. I wouldn’t worry about it. In all likelihood, you have probably had other encounters in your life where you were much more at risk of HSV ie. you kissed somone just once who was just about to have an outbreak or just had an outbreak, has a high viral load and has monthly outbreaks. This is the scenario where viral shedding is real. The risk of getting it from someone who hasn’t had an outbreak in years is low.

But some people like to worry about everything. And some people worry about getting cold sores and somehow think it is a big deal. These same people probably smoke, eat fast food and drink too much. They probably have too much stress too from worrying about shit that they don’t need to worry about. I am not saying that is you. But some people are like that.
 
warubuta said:
J

If she has not had an outbreak in several years, and if when she did have outbreaks they were far between (like once or twice a year), then the likelihood of you contracting it from her is very low. I wouldn’t worry about it. In all likelihood, you have probably had other encounters in your life where you were much more at risk of HSV ie. you kissed somone just once who was just about to have an outbreak or just had an outbreak, has a high viral load and has monthly outbreaks. This is the scenario where viral shedding is real. The risk of getting it from someone who hasn’t had an outbreak in years is low.

But some people like to worry about everything. And some people worry about getting cold sores and somehow think it is a big deal. These same people probably smoke, eat fast food and drink too much. They probably have too much stress too from worrying about shit that they don’t need to worry about. I am not saying that is you. But some people are like that.
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If out of the blue I start getting cold sores, it would raise some red flags with my wife. I can pull all the statistics and research out there and even go as far to lie that I have had it since I was little but you know wives, they only listen to their gut feelings, not reasons. Cold sores on its own is not a big deal for me, not by any means. Just trying to cover all my tracks, thats all :D
 
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fareastmovement said:
If out of the blue I start getting cold sores, it would raise some red flags with my wife. I can pull all the statistics and research out there and even go as far to lie that I have had it since I was little but you know wives, they only listen to their gut feelings, not reasons. Cold sores on its own is not a big deal for me, not by any means. Just trying to cover all my tracks, thats all :D
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Aaaah now we understand the real background issue ... :)
 
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fareastmovement said:
If out of the blue I start getting cold sores, it would raise some red flags with my wife. I can pull all the statistics and research out there and even go as far to lie that I have had it since I was little but you know wives, they only listen to their gut feelings, not reasons. Cold sores on its own is not a big deal for me, not by any means. Just trying to cover all my tracks, thats all :D
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So if your wife gets cold sores, what will you do?
 
fareastmovement said:
If out of the blue I start getting cold sores, it would raise some red flags with my wife. I can pull all the statistics and research out there and even go as far to lie that I have had it since I was little but you know wives, they only listen to their gut feelings, not reasons. Cold sores on its own is not a big deal for me, not by any means. Just trying to cover all my tracks, thats all :D
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Here is the research: My doctor says Herpes is still a mystery and medical professionals don’t know how exactly it behaves in someone’s system. Some people don’t show symptoms for years and when their immune system finally gets weak they may get a cold sore. (It can be a sign for a problem with a spouses health, not his morals.) For some others it could be more severe and lower the quality life with frequent outbreaks. Type 1 causes genital sores in some people. (Which is usually caused by type 2 virus) Babies can suffer fatal effects from HSV2.

I occasionally run into misconceptions about Herpes. People are way too paranoid and judgmental, whereas one out of two people posting on these forums probably carry the virus. Considering the nature of the forum it could be more than that. Some just have stronger immune systems than others and don’t show any symptoms. I’d like to add that a person with open sores is also more likely to catch other STD’s during intercourse. I think it’s a good idea to put some effort in protecting my future children, but in our case the best we can do is to avoid excessive alcohol etc and put some effort in keeping ourselves healthy.
 
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warubuta said:
So if your wife gets cold sores, what will you do?
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Try my best to argue that it did not come from me? I know that she does not cheat on me so any cold sores she might start getting, its not due to infidelity. Anything other than that, I don't really care about.
 
Simonka said:
Here is the research: My doctor says Herpes is still a mystery and medical professionals don’t know how exactly it behaves in someone’s system. Some people don’t show symptoms for years and when their immune system finally gets weak they may get a cold sore. (It can be a sign for a problem with a spouses health, not his morals.) For some others it could be more severe and lower the quality life with frequent outbreaks. Type 1 causes genital sores in some people. (Which is usually caused by type 2 virus) Babies can suffer fatal effects from HSV2.

I occasionally run into misconceptions about Herpes. People are way too paranoid and judgmental, whereas one out of two people posting on these forums probably carry the virus. Considering the nature of the forum it could be more than that. Some just have stronger immune systems than others and don’t show any symptoms. I’d like to add that a person with open sores is also more likely to catch other STD’s during intercourse. I think it’s a good idea to put some effort in protecting my future children, but in our case the best we can do is to avoid excessive alcohol etc and put some effort in keeping ourselves healthy.

Judging a persons cold sores is very cruel, and tbh it indicates that the shamers are not educated on STD’s, the person with the sores might have caught the virus as a child or currently have a condition that affects the immune system.
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I don't think anyone on this thread has made any judgement about cold sores but thank you for the info!
 
fareastmovement said:
I don't think anyone on this thread has made any judgement about cold sores but thank you for the info!
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I wasn’t pointing out that :) Some people do, and since we are talking about Herpes I wanted to share some info my doctor has told me when I started escorting.
 
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fareastmovement said:
Try my best to argue that it did not come from me? I know that she does not cheat on me so any cold sores she might start getting, its not due to infidelity. Anything other than that, I don't really care about.
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So she doubts you enough to assume or accuse you of having sex with others just because you have cold sores? But you wouldn’t doubt her? Sounds like a double standard. But in any case, I think you are safe kissing your girl. I would worry more about getting hit by a truck or attacked by a swarm of hornets.
 
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