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Is Asking A Japanese Woman Directly If She Wants To Have Sex...sexual Harassment In Japan?

Guess the haters will just have to trust that nampa is very real ^^ (and not "3s")

Anyway, apologies for distraction.. Missed the rules on that one

Let's get back on topic!
 
Sinapse said:
Missed the rules on that one
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Just in case you're unaware, posting a person's picture online without their permission is legally actionable, and could result in a lawsuit should they become aware of the photo's posting.
 
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Sinapse said:
Guess the haters will just have to trust that nampa is very real ^^ (and not "3s")
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Still not convinced without photographic proof. :facepalm:
 
John Chavers said:
Still not convinced without photographic proof. :facepalm:
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I'm not really on here to convince you of the 'quality' I'm "pulling"... and even if I was it would come across as bragging anyway. Everybody has different types and mine may not be the same as other guys (I tend to go after and pull "hade" girls, gyaru, kyabas, RQs, nailists, and hairdressers [like the ones who work in Lumine EST and 109].. a toned-down one of which is in my profile picture). If I ever end up meeting you (seems unlikely) I can show you whole volumes of pictures if you're that curious. In the meantime - take my word or don't. Seems you've already made up your mind anyway.
 
Sinapse said:
I'm not really on here to convince you of the 'quality' I'm "pulling"... and even if I was it would come across as bragging anyway. Everybody has different types and mine may not be the same as other guys (I tend to go after and pull "hade" girls, gyaru, kyabas, RQs, nailists, and hairdressers [like the ones who work in Lumine EST and 109].. a toned-down one of which is in my profile picture). If I ever end up meeting you (seems unlikely) I can show you whole volumes of pictures if you're that curious. In the meantime - take my word or don't. Seems you've already made up your mind anyway.
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Those girls have such cute style!
I'm dressing down these days (especially cold winter) but i've always admired gyaru and i love wearing kyaba dresses even though not being a kyaba (yet! I'd really like to do it with good Japanese, a solid visa and a good club. So it could take years. But definitely a dream, haha). It's probably the girls i'd go after if i were a man (i do love les play and i'm attracted to girls but its kinda different than my feelings for men. I once read a term discribing it as "hetero romantic bisexual", i guess thats it. But i dont usually flirt with girls and i can play with any kind of girl i guess, if they are nice and clean.)
Anyway the girl in your profile picture is so cute i get kinda happy if i see your posts just for that picture, haha.
You must be quite a looker if you get so many girls. But then again i think a lot of Japanese women are overwhelmed by a young, confident foreigner and are curious to go out with them.

I definitely agree that people who have free time are easy to pick up (sounds obvious of course). When i was a tourist i spend lot of time doing random things with people i just met. Not that much hotel (on a few occassions though). But random hanging out with groups of students, lots of cups of tea with young Japanese boys and sometimes girls who wanna practise their English and karaoke with salary men, i've been taken to girls bars by Japanese men, hilarious. Got talked to by a scout and went to an office and that is how i enrolled into universe club. Haha.
My life got a lot more serious now and i have less free time. And being talked to got annoying because i'm always on my way to somewhere. I sometimes miss that random time of just hanging around and doing weird things.
 
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User#8628 said:
Those girls have such cute style!
I'm dressing down these days (especially cold winter) but i've always admired gyaru and i love wearing kyaba dresses even though not being a kyaba (yet! I'd really like to do it with good Japanese, a solid visa and a good club. So it could take years. But definitely a dream, haha). It's probably the girls i'd go after if i were a man (i do love les play and i'm attracted to girls but its kinda different than my feelings for men. I once read a term discribing it as "hetero romantic bisexual", i guess thats it. But i dont usually flirt with girls and i can play with any kind of girl i guess, if they are nice and clean.)
Anyway the girl in your profile picture is so cute i get kinda happy if i see your posts just for that picture, haha.
You must be quite a looker if you get so many girls. But then again i think a lot of Japanese women are overwhelmed by a young, confident foreigner and are curious to go out with them.

I definitely agree that people who have free time are easy to pick up (sounds obvious of course). When i was a tourist i spend lot of time doing random things with people i just met. Not that much hotel (on a few occassions though). But random hanging out with groups of students, lots of cups of tea with young Japanese boys and sometimes girls who wanna practise their English and karaoke with salary men, i've been taken to girls bars by Japanese men, hilarious. Got talked to by a scout and went to an office and that is how i enrolled into universe club. Haha.
My life got a lot more serious now and i have less free time. And being talked to got annoying because i'm always on my way to somewhere. I sometimes miss that random time of just hanging around and doing weird things.
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Sounds like you have good taste in Japanese women ^^

Sounds like you've had a lot of really cool experiences as well and you seem pretty open minded so it's not surprising! I find that many Japanese women are actually more open minded than most give them credit for - having had a LOT of same night sex and orgies.. Most of the time with the instant orgies it's a pair of girls that I meet with a friend and things escalate.. Generally 18-20, the young ones seem to be more experimental and open to having sex right in front of their friends! Anyway doors definitely open up to those who know where to look and actively try for things which others might not think possible. I like those encounters because nobody is trying to hide behind pretenses - is impossible because everything is laid out and everybody is naked! Makes for some very interesting conversations post coitus hehe
 
Haha, you too!

Yea, there is a reason there are happening bars here. :))
Japanese people are less stiff as some assume (also once they loosen up to you they totally change).
And they don't seem to have a problem playing in groups.
I've also noticed japanese girls are being in for les play real quick, its usually the first time they experience it (or so they say) but they are very curious about it.

I think a lot of people on TAG have experienced great things in Japan that probably would have happened as easy and as spectacular in their homecountries.
 
Sinapse said:
I'm not really on here to convince you of the 'quality' I'm "pulling"
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Isn't that one of the sales points of hiring you as a PUA life coach? I mean, no one pays hundreds of dollars so they can seduce Yoko Busu-tan. :bag::eek:
 
lol... sometimes I've been tempted to offer a cute combini girl go man yen (or more) for a "date".. Never done it.. But tempted to try.. :-P

I've never really tried street pickups because my Japanese just sucks too bad..
 
If you weren't afraid to say that stuff in China then why don't you try it here?

I heard there is a group of foreign PUA standing on a busy street in Shibuya and saying these type of one-liners to every passing girls. Apparently some do get lucky.
 
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basketcase said:
lol... sometimes I've been tempted to offer a cute combini girl go man yen (or more) for a "date".. Never done it.. But tempted to try.. :-P

I've never really tried street pickups because my Japanese just sucks too bad..
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so.. Have any of the mongers on here every actually tried something like this? With enjo kasai being not unheard of and as polite an approach as one could do such a thing.. lol.. I think opening your wallet to a gal as someone suggested is a less than polite way to go about it.. :-P
 
On the street is probably not the best place for an approach of that kind I think you should probably make a bit of a process of it like take her somewhere more private and talk a bit before waving cash at her. Though with limited Japanese your options are limited. Personally would go with exchanging details then talking compensation later when they have free time. Less threatening than as a stranger in person. Like everything though somebody probably managed it before though if taken the wrong way I feel like it could get you in trouble lol.
 
Sinapse said:
I think it's much more about how you say it than the fact that you are being very direct. If you seem just sleazy, aggressive, or weird, or if she gets the slightest suspicion you might not be serious about your request, it's not likely to go over well. Still, almost all women won't call the cops, and even if they did you could always just run away before they came (not that it's illegal.. But who wants to talk to cops)

By and large the response you will get if you are respectful yet confident and assured will just be to simply turn down your offer. A percentage will giggle and admire the directness of your approach and stick around for a conversation and see what you're like (and maybe something might happen from there) and a smaller percentage still will take you up on your offer then and there.

In general the ones which will take you up on it will be because someone cancelled their plans with them and they're bored, lonely, horny, or some combination of those. Great times and locations to go in with apocalypse openers are around 12-1:30am (just missed last train), Friday/Saturday night in Tsutaya/movie stores (don't have plans on a prime social night), or around 4:30am (post club crowd, good mood, didn't meet someone they liked yet, tired and want to be somewhere warm) and perhaps most surprisingly, around 4pm on weekdays. Other than that every once in a while you just get lucky finding the right girl.

I met a girl, a theatre actress from kansai in the afternoon in Shibuya when I just arrived back in Japan from a trip to southeast Asia. It was about 2:30pm and I was killing time until I went to see a party with my friends around 6pm, so I didn't have much time which led me to be pretty direct using the 休憩しよう (Let's have a rest) line. She agreed and we went right to a hotel. Was probably about 15 minutes from hello to entering hotel, mostly just walking directly there. We had sex stone cold sober, she went back to Osaka that night and I went to my party. Most people don't realize that girls walking around with little to do are often really open to having a little adventure..

The big purple blob is me (kinda started looking like a dick so I ran with it) ;)
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For me, with the majority of women, we have a non vulgar sex related conversation. The extent we go into various sexual topics, depends on the woman. Based on the conversation, I can usually gauge their enthusiasm for sex. This creates a very strong HINT, that most women understand.

On top of that, is our direct physical interaction. If we are hugging or have tongue kissed, it's pretty much a go for attempting the hotel.

In various situations, I have to say nothing, and just walk to the front of the hotel. Especially past the last train time frame. It's mutually understood. In other situations, where the hotel is out of the way or where the physical interaction was ambiguous, I may be very direct about the hotel or going to her or mine apartment.

In general, I've found Japanese women are very good at and often better than many Western women, at talking about sex if you break through their social protective facade. In fact, many Japanese being refreshingly honest and actually guiding the guy on how she likes sex, her experience, and readiness.

That's why being smooth at indirectly getting into sexual discussions is often so critical in breaking down reluctance to having sex.

For instance, yesterday, I went on date with a Japanese women I met at a coffee shop. In the course of the conversation, she told me: she was living with a Japanese boyfriend who they don't have sex often, was occasionally having sex with an older Japanese gentleman in his 40s for a few years, and likes cosplay. She told me things about herself sexually, that even her boyfriend or girlfriends don't know and most guys wouldn't dream of ever finding out or talking about. It came about by me telling various stories of the sexual escapades of my friends and co-workers, so she felt comfortable talking about herself and her own sexual situation. Consequently, we also agreed to become sex-friends. Going to the hotel after such a conversation was a given, not any type of problematic process. The art of conversation shouldn't be underestimated.
 
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For the record, I (and most of this thread) was talking about apocalypse openers specifically. You're now talking about just making a longer interaction sexual, which is a separate, but still valuable, discussion.

Solong said:
She told me things about herself sexually, that even her boyfriend or girlfriends don't know and most guys wouldn't dream of ever finding out or talking about. It came about by me telling various stories of the sexual escapades of my friends and co-workers, so she felt comfortable talking about herself and her own sexual situation. Consequently, we also agreed to become sex-friends. Going to the hotel after such a conversation was a given, not any type of problematic process. The art of conversation shouldn't be underestimated.
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I agree and just wanted to bold this sentence. I think a HUGE part of good game is

1. Not being judgmental about the girl and her sexuality (seems very hard for guys who want to always talk trash and call girls sluts or shame them. Well.. news flash, they're still gonna have sex.. if you don't like it the only thing they won't do is talk about it or have it with you!!)
2. Go there first. This is an old NLP/hypnosis idea but I don't think it's necessary to think about pickup as either of those things. However, the concept is important. If you go there first by leading the conversation where you want and confessing something personal or sexual about yourself, this is often enough to bring it out in the girl.
 
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@Sinapse
Not sure where you have grown up. Waving your pocket/cash in such a suggesting way will be classified as sexual harassment at least where I come from and I think that holds true for some more European countries.
Unless you try it on underage women you are not directly getting a prison sentence, but the fines can get hefty and obviously repeaters tend to get special love from the judges.
I don't know japanese law in that regard, but I would be careful.
 
RandomTokyoGuy said:
@Sinapse
Not sure where you have grown up. Waving your pocket/cash in such a suggesting way will be classified as sexual harassment at least where I come from and I think that holds true for some more European countries.
Unless you try it on underage women you are not directly getting a prison sentence, but the fines can get hefty and obviously repeaters tend to get special love from the judges.
I don't know japanese law in that regard, but I would be careful.
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It's a free country and you can wave money at whoever you like! I never said to solicit prostitution! And, I actually never do this anyway.. doesn't really sit well with me.

User#16452 said:
Most of NLP is junk and I say this having read several of Bandler's books. I'm not quite sure what confessing something has to do with hypnosis, it more likely falls under some other form of psychology.

However, I do agree that confessing your own views on something first can make someone more open to sharing their view too, presumably as they feel that they will not be judged for it.
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Well the connection with hypnosis of "going there first" is the idea that mental states are contagious. Milton Erickson would put himself into trance before putting his subjects into trance. This sort of effect has been repeated in many many situations and ways and yeah, it isn't the exclusive realm of hypnosis but few things ever fall neatly and completely under one banner.
 
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Sinapse said:
For the record, I (and most of this thread) was talking about apocalypse openers specifically. You're now talking about just making a longer interaction sexual, which is a separate, but still valuable, discussion.



I agree and just wanted to bold this sentence. I think a HUGE part of good game is

1. Not being judgmental about the girl and her sexuality (seems very hard for guys who want to always talk trash and call girls sluts or shame them. Well.. news flash, they're still gonna have sex.. if you don't like it the only thing they won't do is talk about it or have it with you!!)
2. Go there first. This is an old NLP/hypnosis idea but I don't think it's necessary to think about pickup as either of those things. However, the concept is important. If you go there first by leading the conversation where you want and confessing something personal or sexual about yourself, this is often enough to bring it out in the girl.
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And yes you are quite right, it's an NLP-like technique. However, it's very practical and easy to implement, where a lot of NLP is taught in an overly complex and convoluted way, or presented as if guaranteed to always work.

Simply talking about sex or sex related topic, can make many women excited and interested in having sex, if done in a careful way.
 
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