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It's been all over the international news that around 50% of Japanese don't have sex. Insane!
http://www.thejournal.ie/japan-sex-problem-2194032-Jul2015/
http://edition.cnn.com/2015/06/24/asia/japan-middle-aged-virgins/
And there have been numerous reports over the years of Japanese sexless marriages, 30 year old and even 40 year old virgins, lowest sexual frequency among industrialized countries, etc... Even the Japanese government, who is spending millions of dollars to address the problem, is very perplexed. Nobody seems to know what the hell is going on.
So, after several discussions with Japanese and foreigners living in Japan, putting up some theories on why this happening. Feel free to add yours...
The biggest candidate we got for Japan's sexual disaster, overall, seems to be found as variations of Social Anxiety Disorders.
The classical definition is a person afraid that he or she will make mistakes, look bad, and/or be embarrassed. These fears can lead to panic attacks, reacting weirdly to normal situations, and abnormally trying to avoid any situations that will cause anxiety or stress. This includes sex, and romantically meeting with the opposite sex.
Many Japanese put an inordinate amount of pressure on themselves, and sometimes others, to be either perfect or avoid making a mistakes. This can come at a severe price in numerous ways, as some examples below.
Examples of sexual and relationship fears and insecurities that are excessive or arguably abnormal in Japan:
1) Japanese Female Insecurities About Their Vagina
This is excessive insecurities about it's smell, tightness, size, even being "too wet"... This puts a burden on sex as the woman is embarrassed about what is natural, when she shouldn't be.
These insecurities can lead to women avoiding sex, when that shouldn't be the case.
2) Sexual Performance Anxiety
This is related to the above, but often connected to men, where they have strong issues about penis size, endurance, ability to become erect, etc... Their fears and insecurities can become excessive, where they avoid sex altogether.
In the case of women, fear that they will do bad at sex and in combination with a poor body image of herself, can also lead to avoiding sex.
In addition, any past bad sexual experiences or almost sexual encounters, adds to reinforce their negative thinking. A normal person realizes they can improve, things can be different with different sexual partners, or that was just an isolated incident. But people with Social Anxiety Disorders and related paranoia, will often take the most extreme negative reactions.
3) Japanese Female Insecurities About Their Body
Too many Japanese females obsess with being (too) skinny, worried about being too tall/too big, or wanting to be built like a little girl.
Often the ideal body in Japan is what many in the West would consider a prepubescent girl. And Japan has had a long problem of high school and junior high school girls being sexually objectified or seen as ideal.
This ( http://40.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kqk2x8LudM1qz84n6o1_500.jpg )
Instead of adult women ( https://a4-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/119/d2a46077b1fa451cb3e52793ba78efe1/300x300.jpg ), ( https://bigbrainuniversestudios.fil...11/model-of-the-day-sexy-black-girl.jpg?w=614 ), ( https://elevenly.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/20130526-110926.jpg )
This doesn't work for the majority of adult women, with hips and feminine curves. And this also serves a biological purpose, like the ability to get pregnant.
Idealizing such unfeminine or childish body types, can arguably be a reason for increased female infertility by itself, not to mention the psychological issues associated with females hating their own feminine curves or bodies in general.
Over the years, I've seen many Japanese women very conflicted and confused in this regard, beyond anything in Western countries. This affects, what should be simple, like being naked in front of a man.
4) Excessive Fear Of Meeting New People
In Japan, when talking about meeting a new person, too often the worse thing is imagined. They will be murdered, raped, cheated, etc... This fear isn't based on facts or past experience, but often weird paranoia and phobias.
But more subtle fears come into play, like fear of making a mistake or saying the wrong thing, as if a person must present and be a perfect image. It's how you can have a Japanese person study English for 10 years, yet still be at a low level, because they are afraid of talking to people.
5) Trying To Constantly Present A Fake Perfect Image
This is related to the above, but is where the person fears being themself or fears making any mistakes.
This often destroys the possibility of forming deep and strong relationships, and can result in excessive superficiality, materialistic displays, or acting way too fake. Honesty is destroyed.
Being fake and trying to act perfect often burns a lot of mental energy and makes it more difficult to be around people. You often have to limit your time exposure and interaction, to avoid mistakes, and not let people get too close or know about you.
It also can make it very hard for guys to approach women, where their ego can get too wrapped up in trying to be "cool", and to include fear of rejection. To avoid the anxiety and fear of being rejected or making a mistake, some men will almost never approach women at all.
6) Too Poor For Sex
Very related to above are issues with spending money on women. Often Japanese women expect men to pay for everything, and this can reach a point where women are percieved as parasitic or too arrogantly entitled. This may also include financially taking care of women when married. This can be a financial burden many men don't want to accept. They may not have a lot of money, feel they don't want to waste money on women, or feel the entire situation is unfair. Consequently, they avoid women as troublesome, to include the entire spectrum of paying, sex, approaching them, etc...
Paying for sex directly, via prostitutes, can add to the problem even more. Japanese men pay among the highest prices for sex in the world. High prices, can mean less sexual frequency or avoiding it all together (to save money).
7) Sexual Frequency
Sexual frequency has become unhealthily low in Japan, in such a sinister way, that many Japanese don't realize it. Many married couples have sex only 1x or 2x a month, thus are considered virtually sexless. More like roommates, than a sexually active couple.
Sex is arguably related to physical fitness, body image, and mental health. When sexual frequency is low, it's often a reflection of problems in those areas.
8) Living With Parents At 30 and 40
This appears to create a huge problem for Japanese women psychologically. Where they split between a kind of teenager Cinderella princess mind and that of a 50 year old prude woman, versus developing mentally and sexually as a young woman They simply don't grow up and blossom. Instead they arguably can become spoiled and rotten at home.
Mother and Father continually takes care of them like a child. And more, anything sexual is repressed by their old parents. Sex stays icky, like how a 15 year old would think, and she don't realize that when her mother was 25, she was likely a lot sexually different than she is now at 55.
Many things that an adult woman figures out about sex and how to take care of a man, they don't learn.
Multitude Of Sex Related Problems
Japan is hit with a multitude of problems that results in its sexual disaster. While many countries may have a few at low levels, Japan has many sexual related problems at high levels. The future looks bad for Japan, unless more of a social effort to change is made.
http://www.thejournal.ie/japan-sex-problem-2194032-Jul2015/
http://edition.cnn.com/2015/06/24/asia/japan-middle-aged-virgins/
And there have been numerous reports over the years of Japanese sexless marriages, 30 year old and even 40 year old virgins, lowest sexual frequency among industrialized countries, etc... Even the Japanese government, who is spending millions of dollars to address the problem, is very perplexed. Nobody seems to know what the hell is going on.
So, after several discussions with Japanese and foreigners living in Japan, putting up some theories on why this happening. Feel free to add yours...
The biggest candidate we got for Japan's sexual disaster, overall, seems to be found as variations of Social Anxiety Disorders.
The classical definition is a person afraid that he or she will make mistakes, look bad, and/or be embarrassed. These fears can lead to panic attacks, reacting weirdly to normal situations, and abnormally trying to avoid any situations that will cause anxiety or stress. This includes sex, and romantically meeting with the opposite sex.
Many Japanese put an inordinate amount of pressure on themselves, and sometimes others, to be either perfect or avoid making a mistakes. This can come at a severe price in numerous ways, as some examples below.
Examples of sexual and relationship fears and insecurities that are excessive or arguably abnormal in Japan:
1) Japanese Female Insecurities About Their Vagina
This is excessive insecurities about it's smell, tightness, size, even being "too wet"... This puts a burden on sex as the woman is embarrassed about what is natural, when she shouldn't be.
These insecurities can lead to women avoiding sex, when that shouldn't be the case.
2) Sexual Performance Anxiety
This is related to the above, but often connected to men, where they have strong issues about penis size, endurance, ability to become erect, etc... Their fears and insecurities can become excessive, where they avoid sex altogether.
In the case of women, fear that they will do bad at sex and in combination with a poor body image of herself, can also lead to avoiding sex.
In addition, any past bad sexual experiences or almost sexual encounters, adds to reinforce their negative thinking. A normal person realizes they can improve, things can be different with different sexual partners, or that was just an isolated incident. But people with Social Anxiety Disorders and related paranoia, will often take the most extreme negative reactions.
3) Japanese Female Insecurities About Their Body
Too many Japanese females obsess with being (too) skinny, worried about being too tall/too big, or wanting to be built like a little girl.
Often the ideal body in Japan is what many in the West would consider a prepubescent girl. And Japan has had a long problem of high school and junior high school girls being sexually objectified or seen as ideal.
This ( http://40.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kqk2x8LudM1qz84n6o1_500.jpg )
Instead of adult women ( https://a4-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/119/d2a46077b1fa451cb3e52793ba78efe1/300x300.jpg ), ( https://bigbrainuniversestudios.fil...11/model-of-the-day-sexy-black-girl.jpg?w=614 ), ( https://elevenly.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/20130526-110926.jpg )
This doesn't work for the majority of adult women, with hips and feminine curves. And this also serves a biological purpose, like the ability to get pregnant.
Idealizing such unfeminine or childish body types, can arguably be a reason for increased female infertility by itself, not to mention the psychological issues associated with females hating their own feminine curves or bodies in general.
Over the years, I've seen many Japanese women very conflicted and confused in this regard, beyond anything in Western countries. This affects, what should be simple, like being naked in front of a man.
4) Excessive Fear Of Meeting New People
In Japan, when talking about meeting a new person, too often the worse thing is imagined. They will be murdered, raped, cheated, etc... This fear isn't based on facts or past experience, but often weird paranoia and phobias.
But more subtle fears come into play, like fear of making a mistake or saying the wrong thing, as if a person must present and be a perfect image. It's how you can have a Japanese person study English for 10 years, yet still be at a low level, because they are afraid of talking to people.
5) Trying To Constantly Present A Fake Perfect Image
This is related to the above, but is where the person fears being themself or fears making any mistakes.
This often destroys the possibility of forming deep and strong relationships, and can result in excessive superficiality, materialistic displays, or acting way too fake. Honesty is destroyed.
Being fake and trying to act perfect often burns a lot of mental energy and makes it more difficult to be around people. You often have to limit your time exposure and interaction, to avoid mistakes, and not let people get too close or know about you.
It also can make it very hard for guys to approach women, where their ego can get too wrapped up in trying to be "cool", and to include fear of rejection. To avoid the anxiety and fear of being rejected or making a mistake, some men will almost never approach women at all.
6) Too Poor For Sex
Very related to above are issues with spending money on women. Often Japanese women expect men to pay for everything, and this can reach a point where women are percieved as parasitic or too arrogantly entitled. This may also include financially taking care of women when married. This can be a financial burden many men don't want to accept. They may not have a lot of money, feel they don't want to waste money on women, or feel the entire situation is unfair. Consequently, they avoid women as troublesome, to include the entire spectrum of paying, sex, approaching them, etc...
Paying for sex directly, via prostitutes, can add to the problem even more. Japanese men pay among the highest prices for sex in the world. High prices, can mean less sexual frequency or avoiding it all together (to save money).
7) Sexual Frequency
Sexual frequency has become unhealthily low in Japan, in such a sinister way, that many Japanese don't realize it. Many married couples have sex only 1x or 2x a month, thus are considered virtually sexless. More like roommates, than a sexually active couple.
Sex is arguably related to physical fitness, body image, and mental health. When sexual frequency is low, it's often a reflection of problems in those areas.
8) Living With Parents At 30 and 40
This appears to create a huge problem for Japanese women psychologically. Where they split between a kind of teenager Cinderella princess mind and that of a 50 year old prude woman, versus developing mentally and sexually as a young woman They simply don't grow up and blossom. Instead they arguably can become spoiled and rotten at home.
Mother and Father continually takes care of them like a child. And more, anything sexual is repressed by their old parents. Sex stays icky, like how a 15 year old would think, and she don't realize that when her mother was 25, she was likely a lot sexually different than she is now at 55.
Many things that an adult woman figures out about sex and how to take care of a man, they don't learn.
Multitude Of Sex Related Problems
Japan is hit with a multitude of problems that results in its sexual disaster. While many countries may have a few at low levels, Japan has many sexual related problems at high levels. The future looks bad for Japan, unless more of a social effort to change is made.
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