Mongering coming full circle

[zawarudo777]

If you search through my post history here, you'll find that I love me some big titted Japanese women. So much, in fact, that I managed to hunt down the one that gave me the best sex of my life, only to be given the cold shoulder years later.

Allow me to paint a picture: I'm young, dumb, and full of cum. I've been living in Japan for a few years and I decide to visit a fuzoku shop I had only been to a few times thus far on a whim. I see a picture of a girl with all of my ideal features: wide face, pouty lips, and big tits. I choose her as my companion for the day and sure enough, she delivers. Not just in terms of looks but technique, too. I fuck her six ways to Sunday and mentally bookmark her. I'm fortunate enough to get one more visit before she effectively disappears.

In the meantime, I've added her official Twitter account, though I don't want to approach her as she's still listed as an active girl on the roster of the joint I visited. Years go by and it's clear that despite still being listed, she's no longer active. Life has taken me back to my home country and I decide to search for her one day, only to find that she's trying to learn English. I message her and we start to form a relationship; we even start to watch subtitled movies together as the pandemic rages on.

Fast forward to last month, when I finally had a chance to visit her. She's living in Mexico to work for a family business, and I'm not too far away. We get along well enough and are familiar with each other, but she gives me the separate bed treatment for the first night of my trip. Fair enough, I suppose. Second day goes by and we've hit it off, or so I thought. As soon as I go for her shoulder, I'm met with a reflexive rejection and we continue the night as if nothing happened. After that, she sees me off for the last leg of my trip, and barely gives me the time of day once I return home.

I know what you're thinking: I must be some obese slob who doesn't know how to carry himself or be around women. To the contrary: I'm tall, good looking, charming, and generally able to pick up who I want. On the other side of that token, I know that this woman is in all likelihood damaged goods, but I'm surprisingly willing to put up with that given what I know she's capable of. That said, I can't help but think she's simply too far gone: I likely value her far more than she has ever valued me.

I'm not sure why I'm posting this here, or why I continue to feel so strongly over this. The odds were stacked against me from the beginning, no matter how good looking or good in the sack I am, and yet I held out for all these years that I would at least get one last time with the woman who rocked my world all those years ago. I guess the moral of the story is to never place pussy, no matter how good it is, on a pedestal, and that whores rarely if ever become housewives. At least for me, it only set me back a round trip ticket from the US to Mexico and a bit of emotional distress. I can only imagine the toll this would take on a lesser man.

 

[requiemmorrow]

Reading this, I'm reminded of the operas "La Boheme" and "La Traviata." It's as if you were the lead tenor, getting the girl on stage, while the baritone gets her in the dressing room. Still a good read, and well...there are always other pouty big tits in the sea. Even here in Japan.

I know what you're thinking: I must be some obese slob who doesn't know how to carry himself or be around women.

Excuse me? I actually happen to be that slob!
And yeah...I don't know how to carry myself around women, either, but holy shit it makes no sense that I have more confidence than you. Channel your inner monger energy, and empty your feelings for her in another woman's mouth.

It will all make sense when you realize a real connection only matters when she plays with the ball in her court. It has to go both ways.

 

[Karbon]

If you search through my post history here, you'll find that I love me some big titted Japanese women. So much, in fact, that I managed to hunt down the one that gave me the best sex of my life, only to be given the cold shoulder years later.

Allow me to paint a picture: I'm young, dumb, and full of cum. I've been living in Japan for a few years and I decide to visit a fuzoku shop I had only been to a few times thus far on a whim. I see a picture of a girl with all of my ideal features: wide face, pouty lips, and big tits. I choose her as my companion for the day and sure enough, she delivers. Not just in terms of looks but technique, too. I fuck her six ways to Sunday and mentally bookmark her. I'm fortunate enough to get one more visit before she effectively disappears.

In the meantime, I've added her official Twitter account, though I don't want to approach her as she's still listed as an active girl on the roster of the joint I visited. Years go by and it's clear that despite still being listed, she's no longer active. Life has taken me back to my home country and I decide to search for her one day, only to find that she's trying to learn English. I message her and we start to form a relationship; we even start to watch subtitled movies together as the pandemic rages on.

Fast forward to last month, when I finally had a chance to visit her. She's living in Mexico to work for a family business, and I'm not too far away. We get along well enough and are familiar with each other, but she gives me the separate bed treatment for the first night of my trip. Fair enough, I suppose. Second day goes by and we've hit it off, or so I thought. As soon as I go for her shoulder, I'm met with a reflexive rejection and we continue the night as if nothing happened. After that, she sees me off for the last leg of my trip, and barely gives me the time of day once I return home.

I know what you're thinking: I must be some obese slob who doesn't know how to carry himself or be around women. To the contrary: I'm tall, good looking, charming, and generally able to pick up who I want. On the other side of that token, I know that this woman is in all likelihood damaged goods, but I'm surprisingly willing to put up with that given what I know she's capable of. That said, I can't help but think she's simply too far gone: I likely value her far more than she has ever valued me.

I'm not sure why I'm posting this here, or why I continue to feel so strongly over this. The odds were stacked against me from the beginning, no matter how good looking or good in the sack I am, and yet I held out for all these years that I would at least get one last time with the woman who rocked my world all those years ago. I guess the moral of the story is to never place pussy, no matter how good it is, on a pedestal, and that whores rarely if ever become housewives. At least for me, it only set me back a round trip ticket from the US to Mexico and a bit of emotional distress. I can only imagine the toll this would take on a lesser man.

You were lucky to have been able to see her again and to put an end to your fetish/love/whatever you can call it. Some people keep their ideal woman all their life in their head without being able to eject it ...

 

[DrCoffee]

Can you please explain a bit more OP? She doesn't seem broke, after all her family owned an overseas business. Why on earth was she working in the watery business of fuzoku? Seriously,. She sounds like a nympho, and yes I can see why you like her so much!

 

[just4fun]

It's bothering you so much because you got rejected. No one likes the word "No".

 

[designer08]

Why on earth was she working in the watery business of fuzoku?

whores rarely if ever become housewives

Maybe this is the unpopular opinion on this forum but why are there judgmental comments about people who sell their bodies? I know that when I was hurt, I shared the OPs feelings towards my provider, but after careful consideration, I could understand that "getting rejected" got the better of my emotions.

Somehow we live in a society where it's ok to sell yourself on TikTok or become an Instagram Influencer with scantily clad photos, but if are in the business of selling your body, you are looked down upon. But, isn't that a business also? And, just because someone's family is successful if you have a gifted body and skill, why not capitalize on it?

Sorry, wasn't looking to start an argument. Just some food for thought. It's my personal opinion but I feel all providers are just trying to elevate their lifestyles similar to the rest of us. A job is a job, no?

 

[zawarudo777]

Excuse me? I actually happen to be that slob!
And yeah...I don't know how to carry myself around women, either, but holy shit it makes no sense that I have more confidence than you. Channel your inner monger energy, and empty your feelings for her in another woman's mouth.

It will all make sense when you realize a real connection only matters when she plays with the ball in her court. It has to go both ways.

Something I've come to accept is that many women look for a man they can "fix" and/or manipulate. As much as it sounds great to get with a man who fits the 6/6/6 rule, in reality it ends up being a stark reflection of her own self worth and she ends up ditching him. I've had women straight up admit this to me, even. If I'm not physically intimidating then with my presence, I'm mentally intimidating them by not being a junkie, making good money, and knowing what I want out of life.

You'd think it wouldn't be so hard to find a decent woman with my stats, but the truth of the matter is that women's stated preferences rarely match their revealed preferences. Additionally, I just really don't have time for their petty bullshit. Even the women I've met who are fairly intelligent (one had a verified childhood IQ of 140) simply cannot admit that they do not play the same game as men in virtually any arena. They insist on being both more of a woman and more of a man than me, which is if nothing else, a sign of deep rooted insecurity about being neither. The reality of our age is that most families will require both parents earning money, but women seem to have internalized this in possibly the most self sabotaging way imaginable.

 

[DrCoffee]

Maybe this is the unpopular opinion on this forum but why are there judgmental comments about people who sell their bodies? I know that when I was hurt, I shared the OPs feelings towards my provider, but after careful consideration, I could understand that "getting rejected" got the better of my emotions.

Somehow we live in a society where it's ok to sell yourself on TikTok or become an Instagram Influencer with scantily clad photos, but if are in the business of selling your body, you are looked job is a job, no?

We are all P4P aficionados, thats why we are on this forum

I am unsure of the statistics in Japan, but, in the early 90s, I worked briefly at a STD clinic in my home country....back then, P4P providers had three times the suicide rate of non providers. For me, that was a sobering thought...and reason aplenty to be respectful and to not demand services which are too demeaning. I always like to think that the lady who is serving me is somebody's sister, mother, daughter...deserving of respect...it costs nothing extra for me to be classy and kind.

The other thing to consider is this: yes, they appear to be well compensated, but heck I have never met anyone who got mega wealthy from pulling tricks. It's a job. A tough job. Not for everyone. Unsure about Japan but in the developed country where I am from most providers take drugs to cope.

 

[zawarudo777]

Can you please explain a bit more OP? She doesn't seem broke, after all her family owned an overseas business. Why on earth was she working in the watery business of fuzoku? Seriously,. She sounds like a nympho, and yes I can see why you like her so much!

Only one family member does business outside of Japan. Past that, she seems to be comfortably middle class. I don't know for certain why she got into the business but she definitely has some type of past trauma. Not just based on how she acted with me, either: I spotted some self harm scars on her that I hadn't noticed before.

Maybe this is the unpopular opinion on this forum but why are there judgmental comments about people who sell their bodies? I know that when I was hurt, I shared the OPs feelings towards my provider, but after careful consideration, I could understand that "getting rejected" got the better of my emotions.

My friend, I would love nothing more than to have a beautiful wife who at least somewhat aligns with my values and can get through her day without nervous breakdowns, episodes of explosive anger, popping Xanax and downing a bottle of wine. The nice thing about mongering in Japan is that you at least get to taste the beautiful part.

It's unfortunate, but it seems that most women today are deeply unhappy and cannot resolve their internal conflicts, so they exhibit the behaviors above. It's not so much that the sex industry makes people this way, rather that people who are already damaged tend to gravitate towards it. I don't necessarily judge women for the choice of profession alone, but it's hard to say that the emotional toll of the job doesn't exacerbate pre-existing problems to such a degree that it ends up significantly altering their course in life.

 

[DrCoffee]

Only one family member does business outside of Japan. Past that, she seems to be comfortably middle class. I don't know for certain why she got into the business but she definitely has some type of past trauma. Not just based on how she acted with me, either: I spotted some self harm scars on her that I hadn't noticed before.



My friend, I would love nothing more than to have a beautiful wife who at least somewhat aligns with my values and can get through her day without nervous breakdowns, episodes of explosive anger, popping Xanax and downing a bottle of wine. The nice thing about mongering in Japan is that you at least get to taste the beautiful part.

It's unfortunate, but it seems that most women today are deeply unhappy and cannot resolve their internal conflicts, so they exhibit the behaviors above. It's not so much that the sex industry makes people this way, rather that people who are already damaged tend to gravitate towards it. I don't necessarily judge women for the choice of profession alone, but it's hard to say that the emotional toll of the job doesn't exacerbate pre-existing problems to such a degree that it ends up significantly altering their course in life.

Past trauma, evidence of self harm. I'm sure she is nice but these circumstances can only make your life more complicated. There's someone for everyone but maybe you can find a more suitable partner if you give up on her.

 

[zawarudo777]

It's bothering you so much because you got rejected. No one likes the word "No".

Honestly, it's not even that. It's more about how we shared the most intimate interaction two people can have, yet left with perhaps the most opposite takeaways possible. It's like when a dog pees on a fire hydrant: the dog thinks it's their territory, but the fire hydrant knows better.

 

[requiemmorrow]

Something I've come to accept is that many women look for a man they can "fix" and/or manipulate. As much as it sounds great to get with a man who fits the 6/6/6 rule, in reality it ends up being a stark reflection of her own self worth and she ends up ditching him. I've had women straight up admit this to me, even. If I'm not physically intimidating then with my presence, I'm mentally intimidating them by not being a junkie, making good money, and knowing what I want out of life.

You'd think it wouldn't be so hard to find a decent woman with my stats, but the truth of the matter is that women's stated preferences rarely match their revealed preferences. Additionally, I just really don't have time for their petty bullshit. Even the women I've met who are fairly intelligent (one had a verified childhood IQ of 140) simply cannot admit that they do not play the same game as men in virtually any arena. They insist on being both more of a woman and more of a man than me, which is if nothing else, a sign of deep rooted insecurity about being neither. The reality of our age is that most families will require both parents earning money, but women seem to have internalized this in possibly the most self sabotaging way imaginable.

I understand what you’re saying man, but reading this I feel like you are harboring some frustration towards the female gender that isn’t getting you anywhere.

You’re going about this the wrong way man; women are individuals just like you and me. Some adhere to the 6/6/6 rule, some take shitty advice about men that you say, but I dare to say the overwhelming majority don’t do any of that shit.

I am a fat fuck at this point in my life, and just yesterday I had a hottie I met at an art gallery a few months ago come to my place and suck my fat cock. I don’t do drugs (I don’t even drink alcohol for fucks’ sake), I have a torturously busy job but I fucking own it, and overall my self-confidence made her cunt wet. She isn’t the only free conquest I had since I started doing p4p—you are confusing that nut blast with some profound understanding of the female gender, when that is all smoke and mirrors that comes out of MGTOW communities’n’shit.

Listen, dude, I am fucking awesome. I need to lose weight, am still a bit too sensitive about it and could definitely take better care of myself, but I have zero fucks to give about the game. Because for ¥22,000 for 75 minutes I beat it.

You won the game, too. You are awesome, too. So here’s a recommendation: Try asking out girls in places where they are not drunk and/or not fuzoku. Think of something about yourself that is really awesome, and let her see that. I have a hell of a singing voice, and it gets me laid pretty much all the time.

If you get blueballed, stop in Horinouchi to relieve it. Mongering isn’t a full circle lifestyle, it’s the diametric line that helps you get to the other side when you need to.

 

[zawarudo777]

Please don't confuse me for a MGTOW. If anything, I just spat in the face of one of their core tenants. Just because they happen to stumble upon kernels of truth doesn't mean the ideas or conclusions they reach from them are worth anything. I am simply stating my perspective based upon my experience and combining that with at least a cursory amount of research on the subject.

I wish I were still in Japan, because dating was absolutely more rewarding over there. Even the foreign chicks I met were a notch above the average slag. It was easy to use mongering as a release valve over there because there was something to look forward to on the other side. Here in clown country, however, the pickings are slimmer than they have probably ever been, whether you decide to pay with cash or time. Most women are simply not in good shape here, physically or otherwise, and it's really gotten me to the point where I can't even bother wanting to try anymore.

I'm long past the point of "what's wrong with me?" and well into the territory of "what the fuck is wrong with everyone else?". Flawed as I may be, I'm doing better than almost anyone I meet without even trying. It's not a lack of confidence in myself, it's a lack of confidence in others, which has unfortunately been proven right a few too many times for my liking.

 

[TheWumpus]

My current partner was an escort way before I knew her. She didn’t tell me for years, but I knew it soon after meeting her by connecting the commonalities between the way she was and the vast number of other women I’ve met here in this hobby. The profession leaves its mark. I actually like that she’s experienced a lot; I have too, so we relate to each other well. And she doesn’t know I hobby, but if she did, I think she’d understand it’s just a transactional thing.

 

[Babaram]

We are, especially in America, trained to believe that the sex industry is amoral, illegal, and that the women working in it are doing it because they are poor, addicted to drugs, or outright "trafficked" to work in the industry against their will - - - because otherwise, why would they. When coming to Asia, and especially Japan, one should leave that emotional baggage behind. Buddhism pretty much just teaches not to overdo sex, that's it, the Shinto religion does not address sex at all. After all, according to Shinto belief, the world was saved from eternal darkness by Ame-no-Uzume, the goddess of dawn, myrth, meditation and revelry, who climbed upon a barrel and performed a strip-tease to the delight of the other gods.

Brought up in the West, we might experience guilt and shame after being with a prostitute, the Japanese (on both sides of the equation) don't. The Japanese wife assumes that the husband seeks professional services, and she doesn't think it is cheating as long as money changes hands. Japanese law thinks the same. We might assume that all ladies in the trade are from an impoverished background, drug addicts, or mentally damaged, but that's our moralistic upbringing speaking, and it's more than often far from the truth.

We should not assume that a Japanese lady with experience in the water trade is "damaged goods." Some sources assume that one in ten Japanese women in their twenties have worked in the sex industry. Among high school and university girls, it is quite common to improve their cash-flow with a fuzoku side-hustle.

Some here expressed astonishment why a female member of a well-to-do family would steep to turning tricks. I have met quite a few very Yamanote ladies who do it for the excitement, and if pleasure can be combined with business, even better. Again, try leaving your moralistic baggage behind.

I have no opinion on OP's quandary, but I suggest to him not to assume that a lady will spread her legs for him just because she's done it in the past.

 

[Babaram]

And she doesn’t know I hobby, but if she did, I think she’d understand it’s just a transactional thing.

Trust me, she knows. And she thinks you are silly for trying to hide it.

 

[Babaram]

Female intuition

 

[Keihan]

To the contrary: I'm tall, good looking, charming, and generally able to pick up who I want. On the other side of that token, I know that this woman is in all likelihood damaged goods, but I'm surprisingly willing to put up with that given what I know she's capable of. That said, I can't help but think she's simply too far gone: I likely value her far more than she has ever valued me.

I'm sorry, dude, but to be perfectly blunt you sound like a borderline stalker and you definitely have issues with relationships, insecurity and women in general. Have you considered that you may be suffering from a condition like Asperger's? You describe yourself as tall, handsome, good with women, charming and "good in the sack." And yet...you're single, obviously lonely and obsessing over an old P4P worker who obviously doesn't want anything to do with you romantically and displays evidence of self-harm.

This has all the warning signs of a future murder-suicide story on Dateline NBC. It might be time for you to seek out professional help.

 

[Sudsy]

"La Boheme" and "La Traviata."

That's the one by Queen, and that guy from Friends?

 

[requiemmorrow]

That's the one by Queen, and that guy from Friends?

There are no lead tenors in Queen that aren't getting laid...
...and nobody really is getting laid at all from Friends.

 

[zawarudo777]

I'm sorry, dude, but to be perfectly blunt you sound like a borderline stalker and you definitely have issues with relationships, insecurity and women in general. Have you considered that you may be suffering from a condition like Asperger's? You describe yourself as tall, handsome, good with women, charming and "good in the sack." And yet...you're single, obviously lonely and obsessing over an old P4P worker who obviously doesn't want anything to do with you romantically and displays evidence of self-harm.

This has all the warning signs of a future murder-suicide story on Dateline NBC. It might be time for you to seek out professional help.

Without going into too much detail, I had valid reasons for not wanting to pursue things further with her until I chose to. It helps that she's out of the business now (of course I have no doubt she's still having sex, as am I) and I'm in a very different place in life myself. We've talked a few times since and we're still on friendly terms if nothing else. I also learned everything I know about her directly from her, so if I'm a stalker, I'm a pretty shitty one.

The point of describing myself as being tall good looking etc was not to toot my own horn. The point was to illustrate that I'm not what often comes to mind when people think of mongers. To illustrate that there's zero chance of this being a purely transactional (in the gold digging sense) relationship. All of those things I said about myself are true, but as I've known my entire life, they're not a ticket to easy or fulfilling relationships. I had to put in some effort to become good with women due to my upbringing and have been mostly disappointed with the fruits of that labor, especially here in the good ol' US of A. So pardon me for being frustrated when the incels think I live life on easy mode while the women I do attract see me as an easy lay at best or a future ex husband at worst.

I had something of an obsession over her, sure, but is that really a problem? She came in my life at exactly the right time for that to happen and leave a lasting impact. There's always been other romantic interests in my life since then. Hell, I was on and off with another woman when I made the decision to visit her (this was during a decidedly off period). So, needless to say, your assumptions are not as true as you believe them to be.

As you can hopefully tell, the initial frustration has long worn off and I'm able to see things more clearly now. I knew it wasn't the end of the world then, though I couldn't help but feel that I ended that trip with more questions than answers. Despite wanting to take things in stride going in to the visit, I wasn't really in the headspace for it due to how emotionally invested I was in the outcome. That was a recipe for failure and I knew it, but I simply didn't see any other way out of it.

The good news is as stated before, we still keep in touch and amicably at that. Maybe this was a necessary thing for both of us. I'm no longer emotionally invested in where things go from here and she has the peace of mind that I'm not trying to use her. I actually do enjoy her company and appreciate her better personality traits. I didn't decide to rape her in a country where the cops show up in a week. We enjoyed a handful of good moments in a short amount of time. And, not for nothing, but if either of us is on the autism spectrum, it's definitely her. She managed to stare at a progress bar on her computer for a solid half hour at least. I'd rather blow my brains out, personally.

 

[MikeH]

The point was to illustrate that I'm not what often comes to mind when people think of mongers.

That is an interesting take. Around 80% of the tall good looking guys I know are mongerers. Though that is the same percentage for the short average looking guys I know.

 

[Cinnabums]

I'm not what often comes to mind when people think of mongers.

Neither am I, the girls think they won the lottery when I show up!

 

[zawarudo777]

That is an interesting take. Around 80% of the tall good looking guys I know are mongerers. Though that is the same percentage for the short average looking guys I know.

Something society bottom text.

I figured that among regulars here the perception would skew a bit different than most, but you know what I mean when I say that. The idea that comes to most people's minds (not necessarily to the patrons of a place like this) of a monger, especially one in Asia, is not flattering. I'm about as close to the opposite to that as one can get is all I'm saying. In fact, I'd even be willing to bet I got started at a younger age than average, too.