It is just not a forum for relationship and moral advice. Discussing that here is a lost battle...lol...
I was kinda surprised when the Nanpa forum blew up because of the gaslighting stuff 🤷🏼♂️ .
For people who partake in this hobby/lifestyle/activities, IMO I think the occasional relationship and moral advice from the users here are welcome.
On relationship/advice forms, at least English speaking ones, by nature of the language used, you’re gonna be stuck with very western views of sex, love, relationships, and marriage. Those forum consensus’ seeming to be marriage/LTR’s = love, partnership, friendship, everything you need from the one person you’re in an LTR with.
When somebody admits to cheating or the beginnings of an affair, either emotionally or physically, they get pounded on (not in the good way😂) by the majority there. Nowhere are you gonna see views like: If it’s not a GF, it’s okay. Don’t ask, don’t tell… and if it won’t cause any problems for the marriage and nobody loses face, and you keep it on the DL, it’s okay. Relationships are more than just the sex aspect of it, especially when in an LTR with a Japanese woman. You can have love and respect in the LTR while fulfilling the (a lot of times missing) sex aspect of it outside. Whereas on the relationship forums, nope, you’re a jerk if you do, you have to talk it out, see a therapist, break up or divorce if you won’t stop, because love, marriage, LTR’s friendship, companionship, and sex are all intertwined and must all be had by the one partner to be a successful relationship.
Granted in countries where p4p is illegal, you don’t have an easy/safe p4p outlet and the only option outside of the LTR is a side GF or fuck buddy, and those can lead to potential trouble down the line, especially if you’re in a small city. Some populations just don’t have the ‘I pay them to leave’ mentality.
At least this site, by nature of topic and country with legal p4p, we can see much less western puritanical views on relationships, love, and sex. Where the ‘alternative’ views are the norm and you can get a mix of arguments on both sides. People are not stuck with one view of the world on here. We got a mix of types and countries represented here.
I’d be curious to know the age, upbringing, and relationship experience of the ones with the stricter views (although privacy and the nature of the internet and the necessity to be anonymous here make that difficult). Me in my younger days had very very strict views on sex and relationships because of my upbringing. This site and p4p in Japan talking with Japanese fuzoku girls have kind of freed me from those views and opened my mind to other ways of thinking of things.
That’s what I said for years when I was the dude who wouldn’t even look at other girls.
That was how I was too.
😭
