Guest viewing is limited

Critique My First Pua

Roman said:
Thanks for the info. Looking back, I wasn't even attempting to show that I wanted to sleep with her. I just showed that I liked her. I was too afraid of it falling apart if I went to far, I still didn't have quite the understanding of boundaries that I'm able to set. Now while reading shock and awe, I have gotten some ideas. I'm still chatting with her though. She's showing me photos of her trips by herself in Tokyo. She's actually kind of playing around with me saying that I'm a cute guy with a hot and sexy body. But then she just said she's joking. Ahhhh, this damn women, she's great.
Click to expand...
When you see her next you can break down and use shock and awe.
 
Wwanderer said:
Maybe it would be better to let the women here do that. What a thought, eh?!

But fwiiw, my guess at the definition of success from the woman's perspective is getting a good chance to evaluate a guy as a potential lover...get a clear impression of his social, physical, romantic, intellectual etc charms and potential, be allowed a decent opportunity to make up her mind, getting to express her decision and having it respected. As far as I can judge, that more or less happened in this case. (Tbh, I didn't read the whole account carefully...got too long and detailed for me.)

-Ww
Click to expand...
The women here are biased so can't do that.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Mr Cat
Wwanderer said:
The words "break down", both of them, are used very appropriately here!

-Ww
Click to expand...
Its a know fact women love sex by the size of the romance novel industry. Its the number category. Its a known fact women will deny anything that undermines their image. And since every woman is a saint, there is a conflict. But $$$ don't lie.
 
4vibes said:
Its a know fact women love sex by the size of the romance novel industry.
Click to expand...

No, it means women that read romance novels love romance, of which sex is a part.

Its the number category. Its a known fact women people will deny anything that undermines their image.
Click to expand...

Fixed that for you.

And since every woman is a saint, there is a conflict. But $$$ don't lie.
Click to expand...

Nice strawman.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wwanderer
meiji said:
No, it means women that read romance novels love romance, of which sex is a part.



Fixed that for you.



Nice strawman.
Click to expand...
Women define sex differently than men. Men just count the act of sex. Women count the whole encounter leading to and the act of sex. It is a proxy for women in regard to sex. When numbers are not available, researchers use proxy as stand in. The result works.
 
Last edited:
4vibes said:
And? A male bias that is based on experiences for a male. I see nothing wrong with experience earned male knowledge. Wait you want women propaganda?
Click to expand...

Your honor, I rest my case.

-Ww
 
  • Like
Reactions: MikeH
In before the thread gets locked because of the pretty obvious arguments that a certain user is bound to have generated, I'll just answer my thoughts (as a definite non PUA) on what I read into your initial post. These may go against the typical PUA ethos, but work for me.


Firstly you sound far too desperate, and most women find this a turn off. Always complimenting them on their looks (so much so that eventually she tells you to stop) just makes it sound like you think they are out of your league, or that you are superficial. There's no need to put a woman on a pedestal, as she'll either think you are beneath her, desperate, or a liar (or worse, a PUA). "You are pretty", "You are beautiful", kind of lame and more stuck for things to say than actually saying anything. Show respect for something she can actually affect, like an item of clothing or jewelry (to me, "I like that shirt" is far better than complimenting looks), just don't overdo it and make it casual.

I would also cut out so much of the "can I tag along", as this makes you sound like a poodle. It leads to you sounding weak and desperate, rather than "can I tag along" I would have phrased it to understand if she wanted to meet the next day, as a lot of the time people just don't want to say no to someone else (yes you get to "tag along" but you invited yourself). Why not, "Hey I'm not doing anything tomorrow, here's my contact details in case you want to go out again"). This puts her in control, but also gives her the option of messaging you in the middle of the night if she's feeling like she wants some company.

The staring also sounds a little creepy, and talking about underwear just seems a little inappropriate as it sounded like she'd tried to tell you that she already had a boyfriend, but you were still pressing for more. To me, the fact she told you she had a boyfriend, and even went as far as showing you pictures to prove it should have been a red flag. Pushing someone into cheating just leaves feelings of guilt afterwards. I would tend to think "Well, if he's happy for me to cheat on my boyfriend, that shows he has no morals, and expecting him to be faithful in return is stupid, especially as I've shown him that I can't be" Also, telling someone, to try and woo tham that her boyfriend is bad is just insulting her choices in life. It's becoming more common in today’s society, especially amongst politicians to show the negatives of the opposition, rather than the positives of themselves, and it's normally because the positives are just not that appealing.

You also seem to be wanting to define this experience as a failure, despite having a few enjoyable days in good company. You can either look at life as "success" and "failure" dependent on whether you get your dick wet or not, or actually look at life based on whether you had an enjoyable time. I know this is completely against some of the PUA strategy, to think of women as human beings, but if you both had a great time (which it sounds like you did) then getting laid happens an awful lot more than the PUA crowd would lead you to believe. Maybe not this time, but I certainly wouldn't call your days a failure.

To me, despite sounding a little too desperate, you seemed to have enjoyed yourself, and she wasn't too put off by it as she's still in contact. I'd avoid going down some of the PUA routes (especially any recomended by 4vibes), maybe listen to some of the well rounded members of the community and just be yourself. You sound like you don't need much tweaking, so no manipulation or mind games to make women like you, you just need to continue being a well-rounded human being that is good company and things will fall into place as you go through life and pick up more experiences.
 
  • Like
Reactions: owlet, Roman, Anna Summer and 1 other person
Wwanderer said:
Perhaps it would be useful to remind the jury of the question under discussion:



(I wish you wouldn't make this so damn easy, takes the sport out of it!)

-Ww
Click to expand...
If you find a female academic sex researcher who will come here and contribute, I'm open. Not some angry site members. Is that it? You want some angry member's input?
 
Wwanderer said:
Perhaps it would be useful to remind the jury of the question under discussion:



(I wish you wouldn't make this so damn easy, takes the sport out of it!)

-Ww
Click to expand...
You guys are fine. Go at it lol
 
4vibes said:
And? A male bias that is based on experiences for a male. I see nothing wrong with experience earned male knowledge.
Click to expand...

Well, if you want the opinion of a highly experienced man, there is this:

Wwanderer said:
my guess at the definition of success from the woman's perspective is getting a good chance to evaluate a guy as a potential lover...get a clear impression of his social, physical, romantic, intellectual etc charms and potential, be allowed a decent opportunity to make up her mind, getting to express her decision and having it respected. As far as I can judge, that more or less happened in this case. (Tbh, I didn't read the whole account carefully...got too long and detailed for me.)
Click to expand...

-Ww
 
NormalGuy said:
In before the thread gets locked because of the pretty obvious arguments that a certain user is bound to have generated, I'll just answer my thoughts (as a definite non PUA) on what I read into your initial post. These may go against the typical PUA ethos, but work for me.


Firstly you sound far too desperate, and most women find this a turn off. Always complimenting them on their looks (so much so that eventually she tells you to stop) just makes it sound like you think they are out of your league, or that you are superficial. There's no need to put a woman on a pedestal, as she'll either think you are beneath her, desperate, or a liar (or worse, a PUA). "You are pretty", "You are beautiful", kind of lame and more stuck for things to say than actually saying anything. Show respect for something she can actually affect, like an item of clothing or jewelry (to me, "I like that shirt" is far better than complimenting looks), just don't overdo it and make it casual.

I would also cut out so much of the "can I tag along", as this makes you sound like a poodle. It leads to you sounding weak and desperate, rather than "can I tag along" I would have phrased it to understand if she wanted to meet the next day, as a lot of the time people just don't want to say no to someone else (yes you get to "tag along" but you invited yourself). Why not, "Hey I'm not doing anything tomorrow, here's my contact details in case you want to go out again"). This puts her in control, but also gives her the option of messaging you in the middle of the night if she's feeling like she wants some company.

The staring also sounds a little creepy, and talking about underwear just seems a little inappropriate as it sounded like she'd tried to tell you that she already had a boyfriend, but you were still pressing for more. To me, the fact she told you she had a boyfriend, and even went as far as showing you pictures to prove it should have been a red flag. Pushing someone into cheating just leaves feelings of guilt afterwards. I would tend to think "Well, if he's happy for me to cheat on my boyfriend, that shows he has no morals, and expecting him to be faithful in return is stupid, especially as I've shown him that I can't be" Also, telling someone, to try and woo tham that her boyfriend is bad is just insulting her choices in life. It's becoming more common in today’s society, especially amongst politicians to show the negatives of the opposition, rather than the positives of themselves, and it's normally because the positives are just not that appealing.

You also seem to be wanting to define this experience as a failure, despite having a few enjoyable days in good company. You can either look at life as "success" and "failure" dependent on whether you get your dick wet or not, or actually look at life based on whether you had an enjoyable time. I know this is completely against some of the PUA strategy, to think of women as human beings, but if you both had a great time (which it sounds like you did) then getting laid happens an awful lot more than the PUA crowd would lead you to believe. Maybe not this time, but I certainly wouldn't call your days a failure.

To me, despite sounding a little too desperate, you seemed to have enjoyed yourself, and she wasn't too put off by it as she's still in contact. I'd avoid going down some of the PUA routes (especially any recomended by 4vibes), maybe listen to some of the well rounded members of the community and just be yourself. You sound like you don't need much tweaking, so no manipulation or mind games to make women like you, you just need to continue being a well-rounded human being that is good company and things will fall into place as you go through life and pick up more experiences.
Click to expand...
Thanks for you input. I will find out how to adjust my ways so that I don't end up sounding like I want some LTR. I will give shock and awe a try and see what happens.
 
Wwanderer said:
Well, if you want the opinion of a highly experienced man, there is this:



-Ww
Click to expand...
Not for P4P...... He doesn't have your $$$ yet.. He just turned 21.

He is looking for someone who can at least attract the opposite sex without $$$ and don't have to ask do you want to have sex. Its a life long skill he is trying to learn.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Roman
4vibes said:
Not for P4P...... He doesn't have your $$$ yet.. He just turned 21.
Click to expand...

You asked for the woman's definition of success. Do you see any way at all that my answer has anything to do with p4p?

Also is there some reason that you think all of my experience with women involves p4p? The truth is that I have much more np4p experience with women, with more different women at least, than the vast majority of men...quite possibly more than you.

-Ww
 
  • Like
Reactions: owlet
Wwanderer said:
You asked for the woman's definition of success. Do you see any way at all that my answer has anything to do with p4p?

Also is there some reason that you think all of my experience with women involves p4p? The truth is that I have much more np4p experience with women, with more different women at least, than the vast majority of men...quite possibly more than you.

-Ww
Click to expand...
I don't ask women: do you want to have sex? Your skills didn't grow with age. You don't need $$$ to seduce young women. They don't want a relationship. They want the experience. With PUA skills you can have women 20+ yrs younger than you. I'm not the only one.
 
4vibes said:
I don't ask women: do you want to have sex? Your skills didn't grow with age. You don't need $$$ to seduce young women. They don't want a relationship. They want the experience. With PUA skills you can have women 20+ yrs younger than you. I'm not the only one.
Click to expand...

Even if true, this has what to do with "defining success from a woman's perspective"?

-Ww
 
Mr Cat said:
What you did wrong : DO NOT TRY TO STEAL SOMEONE'S GIRLFRIEND
Click to expand...

Hahaha, it's not anybody's responsibility to preserve a relationship except the girl and her bfs. If she cheats, it's because she wanted to and the relationship wasn't satisfying her. I find it ironic and misogynistic to imagine that the woman doesn't have the full responsibility and it must be imposed upon men (who have no idea the nature or strength of the relationship) to preserve that relationship (presumably because the women can't be trusted to do it on their own)

I have no qualms hooking up with a girl with a boyfriend. It's happened many times and it will happen many more. If you don't like it, love your woman better ;)
 
  • Like
Reactions: Roman, MikeH and AliceInWonderland
Wwanderer said:
Even if true, this has what to do with "defining success from a woman's perspective"?

-Ww
Click to expand...
Apparently my version of what women want is more accurate. I have applied it to women of all ages. Sex matters to women. If a man is her lover and she only wants conversation, she is too old for PUA and most men.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.