Does it ever end?

[Frenchy]

The point was about GIVING orgasms based on a contract . Which is more or less what all TAG is about by the way. Stop your holier-than-thou woke craptalk 😄😘

 

[Alice]

If you can find some swinger-type that's fine with open relationships then marry her if you like, but know that she's probably emotionally-damaged and sure-as-fuck not mother material.

Dude… 😂😭

Why is it ok to cheat without a guilty coincidence but not to have an honest talk with your life partner and allow both parties fair play?

And like it or not, the people who sleep around the most are the most likely to be parents.

 

[Frenchy]

Dude… 😂😭

Why is it ok to cheat without a guilty coincidence but not to have an honest talk with your life partner and allow both parties fair play?

And like it or not, the people who sleep around the most are the most likely to be parents.

For the record I liked Alice’s post and no, that’s not a butt-dial type of like
First because I like the concept of guilty coincidence
Second because yes, I slept around a lot (even snored around a lot ) and I’m a proud daddy. Not only the sugar type .
Third, I like to annoy Keihan but that’s not new and it’s fairly reciprocal

 

[MikeH]

First because I like the concept of guilty coincidence

"I'm your motherfuckin' conscience"

I’m a proud daddy. Not only the sugar type .

Are you salty then?

 

[Keihan]

Dude… 😂😭

Why is it ok to cheat without a guilty coincidence but not to have an honest talk with your life partner and allow both parties fair play?

And like it or not, the people who sleep around the most are the most likely to be parents.

Oh, I'm not trying to declare one thing moral and another immoral. After all, I'm a former political operative. Moral Relativism is our version of religion. I've done things that normal people would find obscenely reprehensible, and I'm actually proud of them.

All I'm saying is--and a whole lot of the regulars here will admit this, even if only privately--that a home where daddy is constantly cheating on mommy (or vice versa) is not a healthy place to raise children. Almost inevitably you will create damaged kids who will act out and risk their futures. And if by "fair play" you mean open relationships (e.g., Will and Jada Smith) then I'm a huge fan and was happily in that mix with a couple of friends before I got married. But as far as starting a family, which obviously requires unprotected sex with spouse, I certainly wouldn't enter into such an arrangement with a woman I knew currently had regular and multiple sex partners. We all have our own acceptable risk quotas but call me cautious, I suppose.

But the world has a place and purpose for everything, even shitty fathers. I got to lose my virginity with a classmate during my sophomore year in high school, all thanks to a shitty father. No complaints here.

 

[Frenchy]

"I'm your motherfuckin' conscience"





Are you salty then?

Yes I know what she meant and I like the song
But “guilty coincidence” is more poetic and in a way more accurate . Besides I’m drowning in sugar, can’t be salty anymore 😉

 

[Frenchy]

Oh, I'm not trying to declare one thing moral and another immoral. After all, I'm a former political operative. Moral Relativism is our version of religion. I've done things that normal people would find obscenely reprehensible, and I'm actually proud of them.

All I'm saying is--and a whole lot of the regulars here will admit this, even if only privately--that a home where daddy is constantly cheating on mommy (or vice versa) is not a healthy place to raise children. Almost inevitably you will create damaged kids who will act out and risk their futures. And if by "fair play" you mean open relationships (e.g., Will and Jada Smith) then I'm a huge fan and was happily in that mix with a couple of friends before I got married. But as far as starting a family, which obviously requires unprotected sex with spouse, I certainly wouldn't enter into such an arrangement with a woman I knew currently had regular and multiple sex partners. We all have our own acceptable risk quotas but call me cautious, I suppose.

But the world has a place and purpose for everything, even shitty fathers. I got to lose my virginity with a classmate during my sophomore year in high school, all thanks to a shitty father. No complaints here.

Well you can be a shitty spouse without necessarily being a shitty parent…. Kids learn to see the difference over time .

 

[SugoiBoy]

You're 34 and still haven't figured yourself out. That's Warning Sign #1. Then, you've been in long-term relationships and cheated on your partner doing P4P and then you feel guilty about it. That's Warning Sign #2. What that tells me, and I'm absolutely not trying to criticize you, is you're of indecisive and weak character. A strong character would either 1) stay faithful to a partner he intended to have a future with (but you already knew you were tired of her), or 2) cheat on her and be perfectly proud of it. Nothing wrong with either path.

You have no idea what direction you want to take in life, you're almost 40 and at this point in life all you know is that you love a rotating assortment of vagina. Honest advice? Don't get married (at least to a normal girl) and for sure don't have kids yet. You're destined to fuck up your marriage and, worse, fuck up your kids. If you can find some swinger-type that's fine with open relationships then marry her if you like, but know that she's probably emotionally-damaged and sure-as-fuck not mother material.

"DLEE." Can I assume from this that you're Korean? If so, I can then assume that you can blame your uber-Christian nutjob upbringing for most of your guilt and self-hate. When you were 13, Pastor Cho and the congregation convinced you that masturbating and banging your classmates was a sin so you had a repressed youth. Now that you're old, it's coming back to haunt you.

Honestly, if I were you, I'd take a six month sabbatical and go live in either Thailand or the P.I., preferably the latter. You said you're financially ok, right? Take $30k with you and go rent a small flat in A.C. Go out and bang the living shit out of every bar girl that strikes your fancy, EVERY FUCKING DAY. Three, four, five, ten...however many girls your 34yo dick/balls can handle. Get all that repressed Korean Bible Camp bullshit out of your system. Fuck a few (dozen) ladyboys, while you're at it, just to make a point. Who knows? You might like it. But put your dick in anything and everything you possibly can, act out every disgusting fetish you've ever had, and then do it another fifteen times.

Then come home and re-evaluate your emotional situation. You might find that you're a very changed person, and perhaps ready to decide whether to become a family man...or perhaps you'll come to the realization that you're destined to just rock on in life banging ladyboys in the WalMart parking lot. Either situation can be a win.

You might not be able to literally take six months off, but, yes, a long trip to SE Asia (Angeles City and/or Pattaya) as a sex tourist might help you to either get things out of your system or else realize that you have become a hardcore hobbyist.

 

[Keihan]

Well you can be a shitty spouse without necessarily being a shitty parent…. Kids learn to see the difference over time .

With "over time" being the operative phrase, right? Now, I'm not going to try starting a debate about proper parenting on TAG, of all places, but no sane person can state that a household where daddy or mommy is out banging multiple partners all the time is a healthy place to raise kids. It's not, and it absolutely will fuck them up. Attending high school and later teaching high school made that clear enough. And again, I'm not trying to posture as some moral authority figure. I'm fundamentally a royal piece of shit, but I draw the line at letting your perversions hurt kids. And believe me, it's not a pleasant path to walk.

On a side note, I may be getting drafted (again) into the national GOP fight to stop Trump from getting nominated. Guess I can't help myself. What energy and enthusiasm I can't expel into the asscrack of a tidy ladyboy I therefore consolidate and donate to politics. Once more unto the breach, or whatever that saying is.

 

[Keihan]

Just realized I should probably clarify, so as not to come off as even more of d-bag. I'm not talking about old-timers like most of us. OP is in his 30s and talking about settling down, starting a family, all that shit. That is absolutely not the time to be going off mongering, IMO. If you've got a pregnant wife at home, or a young wife with young kids to look after (and planning on having more) and you're stepping out at all times of the night to go mongering or bang side-whacks then, sorry, but you're a piece of shit and that kind of guy should just not start a family. If you can't control yourself during this time then stay single and deprive the world of future strippers.

If you're old, in a typical sexless relationship with a typical Japanese wife whose vagina you haven't seen since 2007 and your kids are old enough to think for themselves and, if they haven't already fled your home then they're desperately waiting to, then that's different. Go in peace. Have a great time. Stretch some ladyboy anus and put some "college students" through college.

My point was that a guy in his mid-30s who still hasn't figured out what he wants should just stay single and enjoy the lifestyle.

 

[Frenchy]

With "over time" being the operative phrase, right? Now, I'm not going to try starting a debate about proper parenting on TAG, of all places, but no sane person can state that a household where daddy or mommy is out banging multiple partners all the time is a healthy place to raise kids. It's not, and it absolutely will fuck them up. Attending high school and later teaching high school made that clear enough. And again, I'm not trying to posture as some moral authority figure. I'm fundamentally a royal piece of shit, but I draw the line at letting your perversions hurt kids. And believe me, it's not a pleasant path to walk.

On a side note, I may be getting drafted (again) into the national GOP fight to stop Trump from getting nominated. Guess I can't help myself. What energy and enthusiasm I can't expel into the asscrack of a tidy ladyboy I therefore consolidate and donate to politics. Once more unto the breach, or whatever that saying is.

Well, as the Godfather said, that’s the price you pay for the life you choose…
But you are right. (Happy?) Yes, it’s overall better for the kids if mum and dad are happily in love . And not alcoholics. And totally sane. And financially secure. And having a nice house with a lawn and cute dog. Kid could still grow to become the Unabomber or similar POS but at least it’s not their fault…

 

[Keihan]

Well, as the Godfather said, that’s the price you pay for the life you choose…
But you are right. (Happy?) Yes, it’s overall better for the kids if mum and dad are happily in love . And not alcoholics. And totally sane. And financially secure. And having a nice house with a lawn and cute dog. Kid could still grow to become the Unabomber or similar POS but at least it’s not their fault…

ROOKIE!! That was Hyman Roth. "And I said to myself, this is the life we've chosen!!" Sorry, when other little kids were playing with action figures and dolls and such shit, I was watching Goodfellas, Godfather I, II (not III) and Casino on VHS.

But that's just another example of the cruel nature of life. You only develop those exquisite desires when you're at an age and place in life when it's no longer appropriate. If only I could've had a hankering for 50yo MILFs and Miran when I was age 23, I would've been up to my fucking ears in pussy (and asshole). BUT for now, I walk the straight and narrow and live vicariously through TAG reviews.

 

[Frenchy]

ROOKIE!! That was Hyman Roth. "And I said to myself, this is the life we've chosen!!" Sorry, when other little kids were playing with action figures and dolls and such shit, I was watching Goodfellas, Godfather I, II (not III) and Casino on VHS.

But that's just another example of the cruel nature of life. You only develop those exquisite desires when you're at an age and place in life when it's no longer appropriate. If only I could've had a hankering for 50yo MILFs and Miran when I was age 23, I would've been up to my fucking ears in pussy (and asshole). BUT for now, I walk the straight and narrow and live vicariously through TAG reviews.

Heretic
At 2:49 in this vid. Al Pacino to Andy Garcia.

 

[Alice]

Oh, I'm not trying to declare one thing moral and another immoral. After all, I'm a former political operative. Moral Relativism is our version of religion. I've done things that normal people would find obscenely reprehensible, and I'm actually proud of them.

All I'm saying is--and a whole lot of the regulars here will admit this, even if only privately--that a home where daddy is constantly cheating on mommy (or vice versa) is not a healthy place to raise children. Almost inevitably you will create damaged kids who will act out and risk their futures. And if by "fair play" you mean open relationships (e.g., Will and Jada Smith) then I'm a huge fan and was happily in that mix with a couple of friends before I got married. But as far as starting a family, which obviously requires unprotected sex with spouse, I certainly wouldn't enter into such an arrangement with a woman I knew currently had regular and multiple sex partners. We all have our own acceptable risk quotas but call me cautious, I suppose.

But the world has a place and purpose for everything, even shitty fathers. I got to lose my virginity with a classmate during my sophomore year in high school, all thanks to a shitty father. No complaints here.

I just don’t like that “emotionally damaged” label for women. What does that even mean? TAG is filled with raging alcoholics but still this label seems reserved for women.

I have had couple clients who seemed very happy and successful both in their relationship as in their life in general. Many of them being moms. Adding another woman in the mix does not cause any risk of not knowing who the baby’s dad is (within the couple).
Even so, the dark days of open relationships being too risky should be long behind people who are strategical. With things like condoms, ovulation tests and DNA tests you can pretty much ensure who the father is and still not give up seeing multiple people.
With the current levels of protection, most harmful stereotypes are just outdated stigma.

 

[Sudsy]

I just don’t like that “emotionally damaged” label for women. What does that even mean? TAG is filled with raging alcoholics but still this label seems reserved for women.

Let's be honest - the majority of men are emotionally damaged or stunted, often beyond repair. I think women get the label because it's less common for a woman to be emotionally screwed up. For us men it's so normalised that most of us brag about the toxic traits that come with it.

 

[MikeH]

I think women get the label because it's less common for a woman to be emotionally screwed up.

Also nobody gives a fuck how a man feels. Not even the man himself.

 

[Kindman]

You're 34 and still haven't figured yourself out. That's Warning Sign #1. Then, you've been in long-term relationships and cheated on your partner doing P4P and then you feel guilty about it. That's Warning Sign #2. What that tells me, and I'm absolutely not trying to criticize you, is you're of indecisive and weak character. A strong character would either 1) stay faithful to a partner he intended to have a future with (but you already knew you were tired of her), or 2) cheat on her and be perfectly proud of it. Nothing wrong with either path.

You have no idea what direction you want to take in life, you're almost 40 and at this point in life all you know is that you love a rotating assortment of vagina. Honest advice? Don't get married (at least to a normal girl) and for sure don't have kids yet. You're destined to fuck up your marriage and, worse, fuck up your kids. If you can find some swinger-type that's fine with open relationships then marry her if you like, but know that she's probably emotionally-damaged and sure-as-fuck not mother material.

"DLEE." Can I assume from this that you're Korean? If so, I can then assume that you can blame your uber-Christian nutjob upbringing for most of your guilt and self-hate. When you were 13, Pastor Cho and the congregation convinced you that masturbating and banging your classmates was a sin so you had a repressed youth. Now that you're old, it's coming back to haunt you.

Honestly, if I were you, I'd take a six month sabbatical and go live in either Thailand or the P.I., preferably the latter. You said you're financially ok, right? Take $30k with you and go rent a small flat in A.C. Go out and bang the living shit out of every bar girl that strikes your fancy, EVERY FUCKING DAY. Three, four, five, ten...however many girls your 34yo dick/balls can handle. Get all that repressed Korean Bible Camp bullshit out of your system. Fuck a few (dozen) ladyboys, while you're at it, just to make a point. Who knows? You might like it. But put your dick in anything and everything you possibly can, act out every disgusting fetish you've ever had, and then do it another fifteen times.

Then come home and re-evaluate your emotional situation. You might find that you're a very changed person, and perhaps ready to decide whether to become a family man...or perhaps you'll come to the realization that you're destined to just rock on in life banging ladyboys in the WalMart parking lot. Either situation can be a win.

That's pretty harsh. Some people go through life differently. Some people have their first sex experience at a later age.

You didn't experience his background or upbringing so please don't lecture him like a 12 year old.

Also, going somewhere to have sex everything under the sun for six months, including lady boys in parking lots, isn't a good idea.

Not everyone can maintain a monogamous relationship - I don't even think its healthy or natural.

There should be no stigma to seek sex outside of marriage, but we are socially conditioned to believe monogamy is the only way.

 

[MikeH]

Also, going somewhere to have sex everything under the sun for six months, including lady boys in parking lots, isn't a good idea.

Yeah but not everyone can do a full year so they have to go with the second best idea.

 

[Keihan]

You didn't experience his background or upbringing so please don't lecture him like a 12 year old.

Also, going somewhere to have sex everything under the sun for six months, including lady boys in parking lots, isn't a good idea.

See the glaring, retarded hypocrisy here???

 

[Kindman]

Yeah but not everyone can do a full year so they have to go with the second best idea.

Spending 6 months in a third world country having sex with cheap sex workers is not "the second best idea"

The desire for sex (with other people) isn't something you can wean yourself off in six months.

That's like saying telling people who want to lose weight and attain a healthy weight standard to binge eat for six months to "get it out of your system". It won't work.

OP is in his 30s, most likely horny as heck as I was in my 30s. For the record, I didn't stop being horny like fk until I reached my 50s. I could easily ejaculate 3 to 5 times a day until I reached my 40s. Now I can get by without having sex (or ejaculating) for several weeks without feeling uncomfortable. If I did that in my 20s - 30s, I'd be going insane. I tried cold showers, spending hours in the gym exercising etc.. its just a silly form of repression, you're just fighting your own natural desires.

You can't wave a magic wand of cheap sex in a 3rd world country for 6 months and expect your own human desires to magically go away. Most likely if he followed what Keihan recommended he'll end up with several nasty or even fatal cases of STDs.

Sex with a variety of sexual partners is just a natural craving by most human beings. We aren't really hardwired for monogamy. The trick is how to manage your very human desires so that you can maintain being civil and avoid hurting your partner.

Of course seeing a counsellor or psy to delve into possible underlying issues would be helpful as well.

No point, suppressing your desires until one day it just pops out in the open and you do something inappropriate in public. If you got a need, you gotta scratch it no matter how old you are, otherwise you'll just do something worse.

I grew up in a fairly strong religious family background. AFAIK, my relatives had strict monogamous relationships but they could behave very mean to each other. I blame it on sexual frustration.

If we deny what is natural to our heart's desires, we are most likely going to express it in other ways, negatively.

 

[fireman]

I'm married, and I fuck around a little for fun and self-exploration but am careful not to let it adversely affect my life (one reason why I am grateful for the existence of P4P).

I have a great relationship with my kids, and I really don't care whether my wife puts out because (a) I don't actually need to bust a nut on any particular schedule, and (b) even if I want to, I can just shamelessly jerk off to some of the excellent sexual memories I have built up over the years.

At the end of the day sex is not your purpose as a human being, except to the extent it actually results in procreating or raising a child -- otherwise, it's just another dopamine rush that wears off quickly. You can get a similar effect from drugs or video games or extreme sports or strong flavors of food. All of these things are addictive for the same biological reason. Too many of us guys put sex on a pedestal as the ultimate goal of life when it isn't even something that will register in the longer term. Do you really think you'll ever lie on your death bed trying to count the number of times or people you fucked? I won't, but I will regret a lot of the time and energy I spent chasing pussy when I could have actually been improving myself or making a difference in other people's lives...

Marriage for men is a massively bad deal in many cases. You are locking yourself in with a partner who is likely to become much less sexual and much less physically attractive over time. Too many men approach marriage as if they are never going to find the same kind of woman ever again, which is just stupid-ass self-defeatist thinking. You will find better women in the future, and if you are married, you will be very limited in the kind of relationship you can enjoy with them.

IMO, marriage for men only makes sense as a partnership for the purpose of creating a stable environment to raise children, and you have to make a conscious tradeoff of personal freedom in order to get that. That is what I did, and yes, I sometimes regret not being able to offer to take a hot chick on vacation somewhere for a week and fill her with sperm several times a day, but that would also be incompatible with having well-raised kids in the future, which I know will matter a lot more to me in the long run.

Your mileage may vary greatly, but basically, it pays to take a 35,000' view of these things and think about what you really want your life to be about.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

 

[hrbb]

I'm married, and I fuck around a little for fun and self-exploration but am careful not to let it adversely affect my life (one reason why I am grateful for the existence of P4P).

I have a great relationship with my kids, and I really don't care whether my wife puts out because (a) I don't actually need to bust a nut on any particular schedule, and (b) even if I want to, I can just shamelessly jerk off to some of the excellent sexual memories I have built up over the years.

At the end of the day sex is not your purpose as a human being, except to the extent it actually results in procreating or raising a child -- otherwise, it's just another dopamine rush that wears off quickly. You can get a similar effect from drugs or video games or extreme sports or strong flavors of food. All of these things are addictive for the same biological reason. Too many of us guys put sex on a pedestal as the ultimate goal of life when it isn't even something that will register in the longer term. Do you really think you'll ever lie on your death bed trying to count the number of times or people you fucked? I won't, but I will regret a lot of the time and energy I spent chasing pussy when I could have actually been improving myself or making a difference in other people's lives...

Marriage for men is a massively bad deal in many cases. You are locking yourself in with a partner who is likely to become much less sexual and much less physically attractive over time. Too many men approach marriage as if they are never going to find the same kind of woman ever again, which is just stupid-ass self-defeatist thinking. You will find better women in the future, and if you are married, you will be very limited in the kind of relationship you can enjoy with them.

IMO, marriage for men only makes sense as a partnership for the purpose of creating a stable environment to raise children, and you have to make a conscious tradeoff of personal freedom in order to get that. That is what I did, and yes, I sometimes regret not being able to offer to take a hot chick on vacation somewhere for a week and fill her with sperm several times a day, but that would also be incompatible with having well-raised kids in the future, which I know will matter a lot more to me in the long run.

Your mileage may vary greatly, but basically, it pays to take a 35,000' view of these things and think about what you really want your life to be about.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

TED talk my ass. You don't care whether your wife puts out because you use p4p. End of story. Quit acting like your shit don't stink.