Japan Vets: Were the Old Days Better and if so, How?

[SugoiBoy]

South Korean banks used to have similar restrictions on ATMs back in the day. In that case I was told that it was because of the labor unions trying to protect the jobs of human bank tellers.

 

[Sudsy]

I was told that it was because of the labor unions trying to protect the jobs of human bank tellers.

To be fair, Korean labour unions are fucking scary. Twice I've been hustled off Korean worksites because labour actions were about to start, and they had already been stockpiling bricks and bottles to throw.

 

[Durg50]

Ahh Bacchus. One of the hostesses gave me a blow job in a booth and then gave me her number asking me to go see her DJ in Daikanyama. All before I was given a bill for some silly amount. Was 20 years ago, but I think it may have been 50k. Luckily a friend fronted me, to which I immediately went to that Citibank atm.

I think i knew her

 

[Durg50]

A little off-topic but perhaps somewhat pertinent...does anyone here ever go walk past his/her original apartment in Japan?? The place it all started?

I have to admit, I do it every once in a while, maybe every other year, whenever it is I force myself to go back to Osaka. NOVA stuck me in shoebox 1K in some shithole cookie-cutter suburb just north of central Osaka. They probably paid around 25k/month and charged me 65k. I actually tolerated it for almost exactly a year before moving to another boring suburb into an absolute shithole building owned by some rich Japanese family that happily leased out their apartments to foreigners because no self-respecting Japanese would pay 55k to live there. But it was a large 2DK and I was all alone, so plenty of space and I no longer had to eat, sleep, smoke (I used to), masturbate and occasionally fuck in the same room. I was so fucking lazy I ended up staying there for my remaining years in Japan.

I have this recurring nightmare once or twice a year, where I wake up on the floor of that 2DK and the past nearly 14 years--coming home, getting on with life, having all these new careers and experiences, etc.--were just a dream, and it's 6:15am and a dreary gray morning and I've got to get up, shit, shower, shave, throw on my shirt and v-neck sweater and slacks and hop on my bicycle and rush to the train station because I can't be late for my 8am 2-nen listening comprehension class at the high school.

I think that's why I walk back to that old building when I'm back in Osaka, just so I can prove to my wary sub-conscience that I really don't live there anymore. I stand underneath the balcony and stare up for a few moments then walk back to the station. Not sure what the deal is but the landlord never rented that unit out again and it's been empty all these years. My MUJI drapes are still hanging on the windows, my Daiei clothesline is still hanging across the balcony, the old plant pot where I put out my cigarettes is still on the patio shelf and I can see my old "Hikari Fiber Internet" hardware coming out of the wall and dangling in the bedroom. Sometimes I'm tempted to let myself in (it's so easy to break into Japanese apartments) just to have an overdose of nostalgia. In Osaka, time really can stand still.

Yep, have done a few times. Its a nice reminder that i have actually made some progress here.

 

[Fifty Fifty]

Does anyone drive by places where they've had sex before that wasn't a love hotel?
Oh, is that just me?

Just one place in particular that isn’t that far from me now. I was looking for an apartment and was dealing with a real estate agency that didn’t necessarily cater to foreigners, so it pretty much saves at least 20% right off the top. Still, I needed some help, so asked a girlfriend.

The agent wasn’t able to show me the apartment when I was free, so they gave us the number to that key pad lock they often use.

It’s a really old building, by now, 50 years old.

We go inside, and the tatami smell just does it to me. Within a few minutes I pulled down her leggings, and finished probably 3 minutes after that.

Nowadays, they may have cameras, back then, it wasn’t even a thought.

 

[TAG Manager]

Just one place in particular that isn’t that far from me now. I was looking for an apartment and was dealing with a real estate agency that didn’t necessarily cater to foreigners, so it pretty much saves at least 20% right off the top. Still, I needed some help, so asked a girlfriend.

The agent wasn’t able to show me the apartment when I was free, so they gave us the number to that key pad lock they often use.

It’s a really old building, by now, 50 years old.

We go inside, and the tatami smell just does it to me. Within a few minutes I pulled down her leggings, and finished probably 3 minutes after that.

Nowadays, they may have cameras, back then, it wasn’t even a thought.

Ok, since you've shared... I'll share something, or at least 2.

1) There's an older building that you can see on the highway when you're passing down through the Ginza/Nihonbashi area. It's one of the more elevated highway zones and it's pretty close to the windows of that building. We had sex in that corner room and every time I drive down to Yokohama, I think about that night we were in that building.

2) There's a small strip of road in Roppongi, back behind some buildings. The girl I was seeing back then was very impatient and needed to have something like right then. So, she drug me to some secluded stairs behind some building and we just did it right there in the open. I'm sure someone had to have seen something, but it was dark and late at night... so maybe not. (It was somewhere behind the current City Heights Roppongi condo building.) Other than the Karaoke room incident, this was the most non-vanilla thing I had ever done, haha.

 

[Discr]

Now this is the kind of erotica I enjoy reading haha
I'm too young to have tales of bygone days but at least I'm currently living my best life making memories to speak of in the future

 

[Maxblack]

My mate met a lovely lady in Gas Panic, the fell in love and immediately consummated the relationship by having unprotected sex in the ladies toilet.
Soon thereafter she was pregnant, they got married, and moved to New York. Has two kids now.

 

[shadowboxer]

My mate met a lovely lady in Gas Panic, the fell in love and immediately consummated the relationship by having unprotected sex in the ladies toilet.
Soon thereafter she was pregnant, they got married, and moved to New York. Has two kids now.

"Mom, dad, where did you father me?"

 

[Keihan]

14 years? How old were you when you got here? I need to get high on copium that 30-31 isn't too late to put the work in to move and live here permanently.

I was 22 years old when I landed at KIX, and just shy of 29 when I gleefully surrendered my gaijin card at KIX and promised myself I was never coming back again. I'm going to be brutally honest with you: moving to Japan "permanently" in your 30s is not a good idea. Unless you've got an extraordinarily lucrative job lined up (I wouldn't even consider moving back unless the gig was in downtown Tokyo and paid me well above 1-million JPY/month and came with fancy accommodations near the office), everything is working against you. And if you're considering coming over to join the Eikaiwa (or even worse, ALT) rat-race, you're setting yourself up for a very sad, depressing, regrettable experience.

For one, you're "old" in Japan. If you're single (and not considerably handsome and/or wealthy) that's going to be a problem. I remember at my first NOVA location, I found out one of my coworkers was 32, the oldest in the branch. Turns out he had to give up his comfy career stateside because his bitch wife (Japanese) wanted to move back to Osaka and be near relatives. He was miserable. Too old to come out and do all the things us early-20s types were normally doing. Not enough money to cheat on his wife with a younger girl. He lasted three years then threatened to divorce his wife if they didn't move home. I believe he's somewhere in Michigan now.

The only guys I know around my age (early 40s) who are still up there either bailed on NOVA, went back to school, got advanced degrees and certs and teach at universities, or were sons of wealthy Japanese nationals with all sorts of connections--two of them are still with Goldman Sachs, last I heard, and one of them is a hotel executive, is stationed in Tokyo and gets rotated all over Asia.

Japan is a young man's game. I couldn't imagine doing it again at my age. Even when I come back for vacations, after two weeks of stuffing my fucking face, getting shitfaced drunk, buying all sorts of dumb shit and having my dick pulled up and down the country, I'm ready to collapse. By the end I often just spend the day sleeping at the hotel or soaking in the rotenburo. I come home and take an extra few days off of work just to sleep. I can't even imagine how bad it's going to get on my next trip if a buck gets me 150+ yen.

 

[Sudsy]

For one, you're "old" in Japan. If you're single (and not considerably handsome and/or wealthy) that's going to be a problem.

You kidding? There are tons of unattached/divorced Japanese women in their 30s and up that are practically begging for dates. My older single friends' only complaints are that they have too many options.

 

[Nagoyaboy83]

I was 22 years old when I landed at KIX, and just shy of 29 when I gleefully surrendered my gaijin card at KIX and promised myself I was never coming back again. I'm going to be brutally honest with you: moving to Japan "permanently" in your 30s is not a good idea. Unless you've got an extraordinarily lucrative job lined up (I wouldn't even consider moving back unless the gig was in downtown Tokyo and paid me well above 1-million JPY/month and came with fancy accommodations near the office), everything is working against you. And if you're considering coming over to join the Eikaiwa (or even worse, ALT) rat-race, you're setting yourself up for a very sad, depressing, regrettable experience.

For one, you're "old" in Japan. If you're single (and not considerably handsome and/or wealthy) that's going to be a problem. I remember at my first NOVA location, I found out one of my coworkers was 32, the oldest in the branch. Turns out he had to give up his comfy career stateside because his bitch wife (Japanese) wanted to move back to Osaka and be near relatives. He was miserable. Too old to come out and do all the things us early-20s types were normally doing. Not enough money to cheat on his wife with a younger girl. He lasted three years then threatened to divorce his wife if they didn't move home. I believe he's somewhere in Michigan now.

The only guys I know around my age (early 40s) who are still up there either bailed on NOVA, went back to school, got advanced degrees and certs and teach at universities, or were sons of wealthy Japanese nationals with all sorts of connections--two of them are still with Goldman Sachs, last I heard, and one of them is a hotel executive, is stationed in Tokyo and gets rotated all over Asia.

Japan is a young man's game. I couldn't imagine doing it again at my age. Even when I come back for vacations, after two weeks of stuffing my fucking face, get shitfaced drunk, buy all sorts of dumb shit and having my dick pulled up and down the country, I'm ready to collapse. By the end I often just spend the day sleeping at the hotel or soaking in the rotenburo. I come home and take an extra few days off of work just to sleep. I can't even imagine how bad it's going to get on my next trip if a buck gets me 150+ yen.

Just be rich before you come here, easy.
🤑🤑🤑

 

[Keihan]

You kidding? There are tons of unattached/divorced Japanese women in their 30s and up that are practically begging for dates. My older single friends' only complaints are that they have too many options.

And there are even more available who are "happily married." But you know as well as I do that no normal male is going to want to indulge in that flavor of batshit-fucking-crazy more than once or twice, just for the experience, and certainly not let her figure out where you actually live. Obviously I'm off the market (for the good of mankind) but if I'm giving advice then I'm still sticking to the warning signs of my 20s: If the girl is pretty and single and 27, be careful; if she's pretty and single and 32, stick to LH dates and LINE so she doesn't know your address and consequential contact info; if she's pretty and single and 39, run the fast-fuck-far-away and just have a wank instead and count yourself lucky; if she's above 45 and down for dick, she's happily married, probably to a rich dude, and just needs an itch scratched so lay that pipe and enjoy all the expensive gifts and your new gigolo man-whore status.

 

[Sudsy]

And there are even more available who are "happily married." But you know as well as I do that no normal male is going to want to indulge in that flavor of batshit-fucking-crazy more than once or twice, just for the experience, and certainly not let her figure out where you actually live. Obviously I'm off the market (for the good of mankind) but if I'm giving advice then I'm still sticking to the warning signs of my 20s: If the girl is pretty and single and 27, be careful; if she's pretty and single and 32, stick to LH dates and LINE so she doesn't know your address and consequential contact info; if she's pretty and single and 39, run the fast-fuck-far-away and just have a wank instead and count yourself lucky; if she's above 45 and down for dick, she's happily married, probably to a rich dude, and just needs an itch scratched so lay that pipe and enjoy all the expensive gifts and your new gigolo man-whore status.

And that's perfectly fine when you'Re a 20 year old. If she's 37, unattached, and looking for 20 year old dick, red flag.

If she's 40, unattached, and flirting with a 50 year old guy - game on.

A lot of your advice only applies to early 20s FOBs, not actual adults....

 

[Keihan]

And that's perfectly fine when you'Re a 20 year old. If she's 37, unattached, and looking for 20 year old dick, red flag.

If she's 40, unattached, and flirting with a 50 year old guy - game on.

A lot of your advice only applies to early 20s FOBs, not actual adults....

Yes, but OP is supposedly early 30s. That, to me, is a danger zone. You're too old to attract the traditional "I want to be married with kids by 25" idiot Japanese officer worker female, and the (pretty) females in your age bracket present significant liabilities and are probably fucking crazy (crazier than your average Japanese female, anyhow). And I did preface it with "pretty and single." If you're 32yo and single and meet a fellow 32yo who's single AND homely and overweight and you're still attracted then go in peace and enjoy, because chances are she's a decent lady and cooks well and treats you well and would be happy to drop her Uniqlo old-lady panties and spread-eagle for you whenever it strikes your fancy.

And then I did make clear the income contingency. If you're 32 and coming to Japan to trade for Goldman, have $750k in the bank and earn $250k/year before six-figure bonuses, then the world is your oyster and you'll easily sample every 22yo clerk in the building before settling on one for wife material, no matter how ugly or awkward you are, if that's what you're after. But if you're 32 and moving to Japan to sing the alphabet at ECC for 9 hours a day and for maybe 240k/month before rent, and don't resemble a young Leonardo Dicaprio, you're going to find it a very, very lonely existence in the long run.

I'm just saying, a 30yo guy with a promising/lucrative career and healthy social life doesn't just up and move to Japan on a whim to go "teach English." Given that, we shouldn't be giving people false hope.

 

[Nagoyaboy83]

Yes, but OP is supposedly early 30s. That, to me, is a danger zone. You're too old to attract the traditional "I want to be married with kids by 25" idiot Japanese officer worker female, and the (pretty) females in your age bracket present significant liabilities and are probably fucking crazy (crazier than your average Japanese female, anyhow). And I did preface it with "pretty and single." If you're 32yo and single and meet a fellow 32yo who's single AND homely and overweight and you're still attracted then go in peace and enjoy, because chances are she's a decent lady and cooks well and treats you well and would be happy to drop her Uniqlo old-lady panties and spread-eagle for you whenever it strikes your fancy.

And then I did make clear the income contingency. If you're 32 and coming to Japan to trade for Goldman, have $750k in the bank and earn $250k/year before six-figure bonuses, then the world is your oyster and you'll easily sample every 22yo clerk in the building before settling on one for wife material, no matter how ugly or awkward you are, if that's what you're after. But if you're 32 and moving to Japan to sing the alphabet at ECC for 9 hours a day and for maybe 240k/month before rent, and don't resemble a young Leonardo Dicaprio, you're going to find it a very, very lonely existence in the long run.

I'm just saying, a 30yo guy with a promising/lucrative career and healthy social life doesn't just up and move to Japan on a whim to go "teach English." Given that, we shouldn't be giving people false hope.

Yeh, everything you've just said are generalisations about Japanese women, FOB otaku nerds and "us"mid 30, Leo lookalikes. 😉
I definitely know of people from each demographic, that by your thought process i guess would consider "unicorns".

 

[Danbo]

Yeh, everything you've just said are generalisations about Japanese women, FOB otaku nerds and "us"mid 30, Leo lookalikes. 😉
I definitely know of people from each demographic, that by your thought process i guess would consider "unicorns".

Sure it contains a lot of generalizations, but also a lot of truth....not only about the women. The percentage of foreigners who sacrifice having a career just to stay in Japan to do some shit job despite being overqualified is quite high. It is hard to make the right decisions. To be fair, with a low salary and not looking like Leo you will probably have a hard time later in life everywhere.

 

[Nagoyaboy83]

Sure it contains a lot of generalizations, but also a lot of truth....not only about the women. The percentage of foreigners who sacrifice having a career just to stay in Japan to do some shit job despite being overqualified is quite high. It is hard to make the right decisions. To be fair, with a low salary and not looking like Leo you will probably have a hard time later in life everywhere.

Sure.
But the same could be said for the people who stay in the same shitty job/marriage/etc. People sacrificing their happiness, working ridiculous hours, living a life they hate are everywhere.
I'd say the amount of friends back home in an overworked, underappreciated but well paid job, or a loveless/sexless marriage would only be marginally lower than the friends, foreign and Japanese, that i have here.

 

[Sudsy]

Yes, but OP is supposedly early 30s. That, to me, is a danger zone. You're too old to attract the traditional "I want to be married with kids by 25" idiot Japanese officer worker female, and the (pretty) females in your age bracket present significant liabilities and are probably fucking crazy (crazier than your average Japanese female, anyhow). And I did preface it with "pretty and single." If you're 32yo and single and meet a fellow 32yo who's single AND homely and overweight and you're still attracted then go in peace and enjoy, because chances are she's a decent lady and cooks well and treats you well and would be happy to drop her Uniqlo old-lady panties and spread-eagle for you whenever it strikes your fancy.

And then I did make clear the income contingency. If you're 32 and coming to Japan to trade for Goldman, have $750k in the bank and earn $250k/year before six-figure bonuses, then the world is your oyster and you'll easily sample every 22yo clerk in the building before settling on one for wife material, no matter how ugly or awkward you are, if that's what you're after. But if you're 32 and moving to Japan to sing the alphabet at ECC for 9 hours a day and for maybe 240k/month before rent, and don't resemble a young Leonardo Dicaprio, you're going to find it a very, very lonely existence in the long run.

I'm just saying, a 30yo guy with a promising/lucrative career and healthy social life doesn't just up and move to Japan on a whim to go "teach English." Given that, we shouldn't be giving people false hope.

You haven't lived here for like 20 years, man. Your perceptions of dating life in Japan are a wee bit outdated. The "I want to be married by 25" trope hasn't been a thing since before the turn of the century... the average age of marriage for women was 26-27 when you lived here and it's 30-31 now - but the number that are getting married at all is falling drastically - we've gone from 7 annual marriages per 1,000 people to 4. Women now are more educated and more integrated into the workforce, and more interested in career than simply being a homemaker. Plenty of prime, attractive, and sane single women in their 30s and 40s out there these days.

 

[MrDuBois]

I was never really a career guy, worked as an accountant + HR for 8 years until I had enough of my bosses and coincidentally Japan made working holiday visas available again earlier this year when COVID was still " a thing". So I quit my job (this happened BEFORE the visa thing - I just needed a break in general), applied for the visa, got it and have been travelling around since June, living off my savings. I never aspired to become some big boss man, head of a department or CEO. I went to work, clocked in, pretended to work for 6/8 hours I was there and then clocked out (that's before I reduced hours to 6 a day at the cost of my income because I wanted more free time). It's been mostly good here in Japan, wish I had done some stuff differently (especially regarding my Japanese skills) but mostly great. Not many people get to have a year "off", travelling for a year so I am trying to enjoy my time and be grateful for what I have. But yeah - he's right in certain points. It would take way too much effort and - more importantly - time to even realistically move to Japan. Also, I have been to Japan plenty of times and know enough about the culture to know that living here would be a vastly different experience compared to what I do now.

I'd have to actually study Japanese and get to N2/N1 levels, which would take ages. I'd also have to go to uni and get a degree. Germany's education system simultaneously blessed and cursed me. Blessed in Germany because I didn't need to go to uni to get a well paying job. Cursed because the 3 years of training + certified graduation are somehow not the same as some random bum going to college, getting a degree in Mickey Mouse and applying to be an ALT. So that'd cost me another 2-3 years at least and after all that, the 8 years of work experience I have would basically be reset to 0 anyway and the jobs I could get in Japan are the ones I certainly do not want. Fuck being an English teacher, I hate kids. Me in a class with children would end in disaster.

Reality is that I should've done this shit 10 years ago and not at 30 and I guess I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that I am not gonna have that nice 20s experience where I stay in Japan for a prolonged period of time, learn the language, play around with Japanese ladies and talk about it on TAG. It'll be me going back home in May next year, back to the boring 30-40 hour work days in a small-ass town, thinking about my poor life choices until I am 55 and get a stroke.

 

[Danbo]

Fuck being an English teacher, I hate kids. Me in a class with children would end in disaster.

You don't have to teach kids....there are also jobs teaching adults/businessmen. Haha, but yeah...if you haven't studied something related to education it is just a huge waste if time and potential.

 

[just4fun]

I hate kids too.....well.....I hate everyone but Kids especially.

 

[Sudsy]

You don't have to teach kids....there are also jobs teaching adults/businessmen

You say that like there's a difference in mentality....

 

[Keihan]

You haven't lived here for like 20 years, man. Your perceptions of dating life in Japan are a wee bit outdated. The "I want to be married by 25" trope hasn't been a thing since before the turn of the century... the average age of marriage for women was 26-27 when you lived here and it's 30-31 now - but the number that are getting married at all is falling drastically - we've gone from 7 annual marriages per 1,000 people to 4. Women now are more educated and more integrated into the workforce, and more interested in career than simply being a homemaker. Plenty of prime, attractive, and sane single women in their 30s and 40s out there these days.

That's 14 years, but I'm also in a likely unique situation here on TAG of having met, dated, gotten engaged and then married to my Japanese spouse, all in Japan, all in the not-so-distant past and when I was well into my 30s. I was extremely lucky--most of my friends in Japan and stateside tell me she's far too pretty to be married to me--but I also came with some undeniable perks. I can guaran-fucking-tee you that if I were still commanding the NOVA KIDS classroom when we met, I would still be single (or married to a 19yo Filipino bar girl). Of course if I were still working at NOVA in my 30s I would've died by self-inflicted gunshot wound years ago.

I'm not saying it's impossible for a guy in his 30s to come to Japan and have a great time. I've got tons of friends who do. They're called U.S. Federal Employees. If you're a GS-13 civilian supervisor making $85k before allowances and generous overtime plus free housing and possibly a vehicle, and the shipyard offers you a posting in Yokosuka, of course you can come over and easily score some ass and very likely meet some girl in her 20s who'd love a green card and life at your home port. If you're an FSO for the U.S. State Dept--a job I was offered a decade ago and turned down--and get posted at the embassy in Tokyo or Osaka, with your subsidized EVERYTHING and lifetime posts all around the world, it'd be no problem at all finding some adventurous young thing who'd love to come along with you and enjoy all those federal spouse benefits. And then obviously if you're some corporate executive posted in Tokyo with a seven-figure salary before stock options, you need not lift a finger to have young vagina coming at you from every direction, no matter how old you are.

But if you're some 35yo JET ALT singing the body-parts song every morning at some shithole elementary school, going home to your 1K flat and Lawson's bento and 300k/month salary, you are not going to be flooded with dating opportunities. I know you're sympathetic/empathetic toward those looking for a "better" life in Japan, but again, I think it's irresponsible to give false hope. Say there's some balding, single 35yo "barista" at Starbucks with a junior college degree, living with his parents and when not masturbating on Pornhub he comes across TAG where certain posters enthrall his imagination with the same silly womens' rag statistics I remember seeing on TV in 2003 (and still see today since I have to watch the same stupid Japanese TV programming you all do) such as "9 OUT OF 10 JAPANESE WOMEN SAY THEY PREFER SMALL DICKS," or "4 OUT OF 5 JAPANESE WOMEN WANT TO GET MARRIED IN THEIR 90S" or "6 OUT OF 7 JAPANESE WOMEN DON'T CARE IF THEY DIE BROKE," and that actually persuades said "barista" to quit his lifetime career and apply for an eikaiwa job that pays him less than a cook at McDonald's and he somehow finds himself in Japan and left to figure out how to survive on 240k/month and he's still 35, still bald, still ugly, still fat, still awkward, still stunted but now expecting teenaged girls to be throwing their pussies at him just because he's white and speaks English.

That's a recipe for a school shooting. Or, since it's Japan, perhaps a school stabbing. Or at the very least a date with the front windshield of JR express train.

I'm just saying, sometimes no hope is better than false hope.