No country for chubby women

[Misslorena]

In Africa (including north Africa) they love chubby women.

As far as I'm concerned I prefer slim women but I had some nights of passion with more than one chubby woman and none of them was as cute as you are (according to your avatar).

That went from informative, to neutral, to interesting to adorable, what a rollercoaster of a comment thank you!

 

[User#8628]

In countless occasions I've had to tell someone I'm not interested or that I am married (in a nice way) just to receive a "you're a fat ugly bitch anyway" sure, he was interested 5 min ago, until I didn't comply and now I'm a disfigured manatee.

This just doesn't make sense to me. I assume they say things like this to protect their "honor" or "pride", but dont they realize how stupid it looks to be hitting on a girl and telling her you want her and then call her fat and ugly if she says no.

 

[User#8628]

Unfortunately the ones that are, ruin the expeirence for the rest of you. Kind of how the yakuza ruined onsen for me.

I don't know if its really their fault though. In many countries, certain tattoos are associated with criminality or bad organizations but i don't know of other countries who ban all tattoos, even totally different looking ones, out of public places for that reason.

 

[MikeH]

This just doesn't make sense to me. I assume they say things like this to protect their "honor" or "pride", but dont they realize how stupid it looks to be hitting on a girl and telling her you want her and then call her fat and ugly if she says no.

Maybe their type is fat and ugly girls? Or maybe they are just insecure stupid assholes. The latter is my guess.

 

[Misslorena]

This just doesn't make sense to me. I assume they say things like this to protect their "honor" or "pride", but dont they realize how stupid it looks to be hitting on a girl and telling her you want her and then call her fat and ugly if she says no.

To my understanding, it comes down to ego. A lot of people can't deal with rejection, so their instinct is to hurt back as soon as they've been "hurt"
How can you not want them if you're not incredibly attractive?
Which sets me off honestly, because chubby or bigger women tend to be seen as the bottom of the dating chain and they expect us to be grateful, like they're doing us a big favor by finding us attractive. It's infuriating

 

[Misslorena]

I don't know if its really their fault though. In many countries, certain tattoos are associated with criminality or bad organizations but i don't know of other countries who ban all tattoos, even totally different looking ones, out of public places for that reason.

They are, even in Mexico since we do have the Mara. But that doesn't prevent people from entering establishments, we even have anti discrimination laws that stop companies from not hiring people with tattoos or having to cover them up.

 

[e-smile]

This just doesn't make sense to me. I assume they say things like this to protect their "honor" or "pride", but dont they realize how stupid it looks to be hitting on a girl and telling her you want her and then call her fat and ugly if she says no.

Very childish reaction indeed.

 

[Misslorena]

Maybe their type is fat and ugly girls? Or maybe they are just insecure stupid assholes. The latter is my guess.

It really is about ego and insecurity I think.
But it has happened to me in multiple occasions and one was really scary, since it happened in person. I was genuinely scared for my life, I even called the police.

 

[Sudsy]

It really is about ego and insecurity I think.

Bingo.

Many men (and women) never learn to deal with their ego when they're younger, and it manifests in an inability to handle rejection and disappointment in adulthood.

 

[foobarxyzabc]

Bingo.

Many men (and women) never learn to deal with their ego when they're younger, and it manifests in an inability to handle rejection and disappointment in adulthood.

In the end it is a matter of perspective as rejection itself is a valuable feedback. If you know that person is not interested, then its time to move on.

 

[Sinapse]

I like some extra cushion in the right areas.. but thats exactly it.. it's gotta be in the right areas. Hip to waist ratio is important, and curvy is good but actually obese is not attractive IMO.

 

[ShowaJidai]

A fool who never learns to control his ego lives his life being controlled by it.

 

[Sinapse]

So here's some images of body fat % in women. I'm not sure how accurate the percentages are, and the angle and lighting account for a lot, but there's at least something to discuss here.

The 15% girl has no "attributes" (breasts, ass etc) and is just sort of a skinny plank, so kind of a no go for me. On the higher end, I think all of the ones listed at 25% and 25-26% (possibly excluding the middle one in the orange bikini) look worse than the girl at 30%. If you compare the girl at 30% to the one listed 25-26%, she has larger hips and bigger breasts, which carry her fat much better than the 25-26% girl, who has a lot more in the stomach comparatively. Up at 35% she has curves yes, but would look better without the belly fat. Although, if she had bigger breasts and ass than it looks like she does, she would still be a "yes" for me. As she look in this picture, I'd let her pass. In other words, the important characteristics are the ratios: T&A (and hips) to belly fat.

https://deepstrength.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/tumblr_inline_noq8yi4d2y1t6co2z_500.png


I think my ideal girl in terms of body looks like the girl at the beginning of Hotling Bling, which is curvy in the best possible way:

 

[Misslorena]

I like some extra cushion in the right areas.. but thats exactly it.. it's gotta be in the right areas. Hip to waist ratio is important, and curvy is good but actually obese is not attractive IMO.

It's completely fine. Some people do find very big guys and gals attractive, but many don't.
I have a small belly because none at all is almost impossible, unless you get lipo like a Kardashian.
I personally feel attracted to a hip-waist ratio myself, from years of being obsessed with art and classical paintings. But I do find beauty everywhere.

 

[Misslorena]

So here's some images of body fat % in women. I'm not sure how accurate the percentages are, and the angle and lighting account for a lot, but there's at least something to discuss here.

The 15% girl has no "attributes" (breasts, ass etc) and is just sort of a skinny plank, so kind of a no go for me. On the higher end, I think all of the ones listed at 25% and 25-26% (possibly excluding the middle one in the orange bikini) look worse than the girl at 30%. If you compare the girl at 30% to the one listed 25-26%, she has larger hips and bigger breasts, which carry her fat much better than the 25-26% girl, who has a lot more in the stomach comparatively. Up at 35% she has curves yes, but would look better without the belly fat. Although, if she had bigger breasts and ass than it looks like she does, she would still be a "yes" for me. As she look in this picture, I'd let her pass. In other words, the important characteristics are the ratios: T&A (and hips) to belly fat.

https://deepstrength.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/tumblr_inline_noq8yi4d2y1t6co2z_500.png


I think my ideal girl in terms of body looks like the girl at the beginning of Hotling Bling, which is curvy in the best possible way:

I'm sorry but it's really hard to have a lot of curves with no belly fat. You can exercise, but that shrinks you down in all directions usually, even when you just target belly fat.

I'm between 30% and 35% right in the middle.

Although we like what we like, measuring girls in terms of ratios and body fat is fine, until you fall in love, then you stop really caring (unless someone is like super big, and it's not your thing I get it) but sometimes even then.

I used to have all this likes and dislikes: tall, corpulent, beard, like a Viking. and fell in love and married the skinniest man possible, it can happen!

 

[Misslorena]

So here's some images of body fat % in women. I'm not sure how accurate the percentages are, and the angle and lighting account for a lot, but there's at least something to discuss here.

The 15% girl has no "attributes" (breasts, ass etc) and is just sort of a skinny plank, so kind of a no go for me. On the higher end, I think all of the ones listed at 25% and 25-26% (possibly excluding the middle one in the orange bikini) look worse than the girl at 30%. If you compare the girl at 30% to the one listed 25-26%, she has larger hips and bigger breasts, which carry her fat much better than the 25-26% girl, who has a lot more in the stomach comparatively. Up at 35% she has curves yes, but would look better without the belly fat. Although, if she had bigger breasts and ass than it looks like she does, she would still be a "yes" for me. As she look in this picture, I'd let her pass. In other words, the important characteristics are the ratios: T&A (and hips) to belly fat.

https://deepstrength.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/tumblr_inline_noq8yi4d2y1t6co2z_500.png


I think my ideal girl in terms of body looks like the girl at the beginning of Hotling Bling, which is curvy in the best possible way:

Also damn I agree. Sure I wish I looked like her!

 

[Kaspar]

I'm not going to read all previous posts, it's almost dinner time and if I don't cook for myself, nobody will.

I might be more inclined to like a certain body type rather than another one, that's true... But but but if we're talking what kind of person I like to hang out with, it all boils down to personality, interests, ability to hold a conversation etc... Sexiness is a mind game, body can be secondary.

 

[User#8628]

Hmm, i think i might be closest to the orange bikini girl, so maybe 25 percent.

 

[Misslorena]

Hmm, i think i might be closest to the orange bikini girl, so maybe 25 percent.

I thought you look smaller than that! beautiful either way.

 

[User#8628]

I thought you look smaller than that! beautiful either way.

I got some curves hiding under those Japanese clothes ^^
Its like they only make sacks nowadays which don't make curves pop out like before.

 

[Sinapse]

I'm sorry but it's really hard to have a lot of curves with no belly fat. You can exercise, but that shrinks you down in all directions usually, even when you just target belly fat.

Yeah, for sure! Must be hard

I'm between 30% and 35% right in the middle.

Sounds good!
Definitely something you can't easily find in Japan (or Thailand, where I'm at atm)! I sometimes do wonder why I'm in Asian countries with the preferences I have haha.. but I guess I do have a lot of "types"... they are each pretty specific but in different sectors or "looks"

Although we like what we like, measuring girls in terms of ratios and body fat is fine, until you fall in love, then you stop really caring (unless someone is like super big, and it's not your thing I get it) but sometimes even then.

100% agree.

I spend an inordinate amount of time chasing bitchy blonde kyabajos but often end up dating the sweetest girls ever... and my one of my longest exes wasn't curvy in the least.

 

[Misslorena]

I got some curves hiding under those Japanese clothes ^^
Its like they only make sacks nowadays which don't make curves pop out like before.

Nice! *wink* baggy clothes really don't work for my body type I look like a mad bloated potato.

 

[TheScientist]

don't forget this: at least in many occasions and I've experienced this first hand, men become aggressive and offensive when you turn them down, even in the most polite way. Shit even when you reply with "thanks" you're sometimes an entitled ugly whore.

If you ever have a son, give him the talk my mom gave me: "if you ask a girl out and she says no, just say 'OK' and move on to the next girl". This will not only teach your son to be polite in the situation described but will also help him not to develop the paralyzing fear of rejection which holds back lots of young men from getting a girlfriend or wife.

because chubby or bigger women tend to be seen as the bottom of the dating chain and they expect us to be grateful, like they're doing us a big favor by finding us attractive. It's infuriating

And OTOH I've also encountered lots of larger women who get ultra defensive when I hit on them or even into the dating process no matter how many times I re-assure them. That too gets infuriating.

 

[Misslorena]

If you ever have a son, give him the talk my mom gave me: "if you ask a girl out and she says no, just say 'OK' and move on to the next girl". This will not only teach your son to be polite in the situation described but will also help him not to develop the paralyzing fear of rejection which holds back lots of young men from getting a girlfriend or wife.

Count on it!

And OTOH I've also encountered lots of larger women who get ultra defensive when I hit on them or even into the dating process no matter how many times I re-assure them. That too gets infuriating.

I get that this can be annoying, I do. And you have good intentions. Like I mentioned, the bad guys are ruining it for the good ones.

Even being married I sometimes wonder why my husband picked the chubby Latina over all the gorgeous skinny white girls in Texas. He always says:
"Well because you are not like them, exactly. If I wanted to be with them I would"

It's tough to break old habits, and many girls are ultra defensive because they've been burned too many times. Not an excuse or even a good reason, but it sort of explains it.

But believe me when we do come out of our jiggly shells, its worth it!

 

[TheScientist]

I get that this can be annoying, I do. And you have good intentions. Like I mentioned, the bad guys are ruining it for the good ones.

Even being married I sometimes wonder why my husband picked the chubby Latina over all the gorgeous skinny white girls in Texas. He always says:
"Well because you are not like them, exactly. If I wanted to be with them I would"

It's tough to break old habits, and many girls are ultra defensive because they've been burned too many times. Not an excuse or even a good reason, but it sort of explains it.

But believe me when we do come out of our jiggly shells, its worth it!

You get that you could flip genders in any of what you said and it would still be true?